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  1. The one thing I want everyone to know about me… I lost my husband unexpectedly in May of last year and became homeless within hours of his passing. I found out 90 days later that my husband had been abusing meth when I finally got the tox report. They called it a toxic mix of meth, fentanyl, gabapentin and cyclobenzaprine. I had not idea he was using or abusing meth… when I’d ask him why he was acting the way he was (on the rare occasions that I saw signs and symptoms) he would blame it on his PTSD from his time in the Marine Corps. It has been almost a year… next month… and that alone scares me. But I have been in survival mode since he’s passed which causes nothing but more problems because I cannot fully focus on anything in my life while also throwing on this heavy burden of grief and PTSD that no one seems to truly understand. Life moves on whether we’re ready or able to keep walking with it. So everyday is still a struggle, one foot in front of the other is still difficult even a year later. I’m here to be surrounded with people that will support me as I will support them through all of life’s up and downs.
  2. ,After divorcing my spouse of 25 years, I became increasingly aware of the impact his behavior during the last phase of our marriage had on me. It caused symptoms of anxiety and PTSD (not from physical abuse) which became worse after beginning to date again. Symptoms did not worsen because of lack of effort as I work hard to grow from this. Difficulties worsened as my dating relationship became more serious. The relationship is great. Yet the anxiety and PTSD are more prevalent now even though the relationship I am in is healthy. Wondering if others have experienced this and how you dealt with anxious thoughts and PTSD triggers.
  3. I was a journalist at the top of my career with the Australian Broadcasting Corporation when depression and PTSD took hold. I thought my life was over, but I found purpose and self-worth again by volunteering in a school in rural Nepal, 18 months after the earthquakes which claimed 9000 lives. I still have some bad days, but I now live a life of passion and purpose. I love supporting others and lifting people up. Every person has a story to tell and amazing potential.
  4. Hi, I don’t know why I’m here. Maybe because I’m in a state of depression and anxiety. I cannot cry even though deep inside I am bursting. My psychologist “labeled” me with Complex PTSD. I have seen many psychologists in my past, and don’t think they can help me. That’s why I stopped going. I don’t know if this website will help me either. But, I am giving it a shot.
  5. @elastic man, stress levels may drop with meditation. Additionally, it can lessen the effects of stress-related illnesses like fibromyalgia, PTSD, and irritable bowel syndrome (IBS). Better focus from regular meditation may lead to an improvement in memory and mental clarity.
  6. Hello all I just wanted to reach out and start a conversation about anything, i guess. I'm not sure what i am looking for in life right now. I've hit a spot where nothing feels exciting or the things that do feel exciting feel unattainable. So i'm just downloading any and every app visiting any and every website hoping life will bring the answers to me. I am 33 a single mom, recently diagnosed and medicated for ADHD. I can't stand my job. I'm tired of feeling stuck. I feel like I have this big ball of greatest inside me with no way out. I don't have very many friends and none that I actually hangout with. I'm not sure what to do or where to start. Being diagnosed with ADHD (and at the same time PTSD) was on one hand amazing because I thought i was just a broken person with no real reason as to why but on the other hand i'm really upset that growing up no one in my life took any time to try and help me figure out who i am and what i am the way that i am. Does anyone out there have a similar situation (or had) and can recommend what to do to figure myself out? To figure out what i want and how i can feel like its possible? Thank you for reading
  7. I was also in the military, but my PTSD did not come from my time in Army. It came from the death of my husband. Even though I was military myself, I never experienced war. But the night my husband died... I was the one who found him and within hours I found myself homeless. I had never been in life or death situation; never had to call 911. The fact that he passed so quickly... From being a relatively healthy 40 year old male (11 days past his 40th birthday) to gone in an instant is part of the trauma I am experiencing. He seemed like Superman to everyone that knew him, invincible; a presence that was so big it would never just be "gone". When I close my eyes every night, the night that he passed flashes through my brain and I can't sleep. Reliving the moments before, during and after his passing... The What If's and If I Had Known's plague me every day. The loss of someone I thought I would spend the rest of my life with... And then, add on the trauma of finding myself homeless with 3 dogs within hours of his passing... they pronounced his time of death at just before 11PM on a Saturday and by 4AM that same Saturday I was homeless with only our car and 3 dogs.. All of my family are in California and I am in Texas.. and alone now. A veteran non profit org helped me, put me up into a hotel but it was in a very seedy part of the city I live in. And although I am grateful that I was not truly ever "on the streets", I never felt safe and my only goal was to get out of there as quickly as possible. I have been in survival mode since the day he died. I am now in my own apartment, thanks to the help of that veteran non profit org, but being in survival mode and the grief of my loss being so heavy.. I have found myself overwhelmed into complacency. Not wanting to leave this earth but feeling like I can't succeed on my own, like I can't succeed without him, like I can't succeed in the face of this overwhelming and all consuming grief that I have not been able to fully process and give it the time it needs for me to be able to start to heal from the loss and everything I've experienced as a result of it. I hope this helps explain a little more where the trauma comes from, and please forgive me if any of that sounded as if I was upset by the question, because I am not. I appreciate the question and wanted only to explain where it comes from.
  8. Were you also in the military? I'm wondering if you can share where your PTSD came from.
  9. In answer to the question , I'm a father of three. Hi all . Came across this site and thought why not sign up . Just something quick to share if it's OK. In June I suffered a serious accident at work. Since doing so I'm now having therapy to help with PTSD , so far so good. But my main drive into helping myself recover from my injury is something my father told me on his dying days , is in life you just have to get up and get on no matter what , because if not then what is the point. He thought an illness for eight years with this mindset . I try and keep this in mind when I'm feeling low . May 2023 be the kindest yet for everyone 🙏
  10. Affirming to Tara that she is look strong, confident and perfect when she states " "I find myself now in a state where I can't enjoy all the kind things this new guy is doing to me ..." whilst admirable, is not going to change how Tara feels ... I'm all for being nice BUT you also have to take a stand in this situation and tell him exactly what you just told us. I understand what it's like to be a real victim to being beaten. That's not victim status although can lead to it. It's a cycle. I'm 53 and been through hell with this kind of thing. I was beaten as a child, and went on to become a target for many others and when all else failed I started beating others. I also thought for years to help my daughter and grandson to escape the grips of wife and child beaters and ultimately went on to help setup crisis housing for victims of domestics abuse. The cycle and dynamics at play within this kind of behavior pattern is not something to toy with. I fully hear what your saying Tara and I can't underestimate how laying those boundaries down right now is the best way to go about it. I'm not suggesting this guy is the bad one ... but you would do well to lay those boundaries for yourself. Acknowledge your own feelings here right now and let this guy know. If he is really as nice as he makes out to be then not an issue. In such a case we become more our own problem when holding onto all the stuff that happened to us previously. It took my daughters several tries with the same guy with every episode involving much of the same thing that came before it just like you admit yourself Tara. This is why in my previous post I made sure to include my own vulnerabilities and own my own imperfections because right now your own imperfections with how you really feel can be exploited with all the bubbly talk that does more to make you feel more like someone that needs help when really all you want is to focus on being happy ... being your true self. That's not going to happen if you respond in kind when feeling as you say you do. It's OK to feel as you do (meaning it's understandable) but the only way to move on is to tell others why we feel the way we do. If we hold it in we just keep having a distorted view that leads to an addiction on negative emotion and play the cycle over and over. We also become good play things for others. I can tell you how great you are but means little if your really feeling the way you say. I would much rather cut to the chase and deal with what you and I or anyone else really needs to deal with in these kind of cases. It does not matter how nice this guy is but it does matter how your feeling ... how your really feeling inside regardless of whomever. Dealing with that is a priority and how you deal with that will set the path for what is to follow. When I left all those feeling unresolved (takes a lifetime for many ... myself included) issues unattended and made it about someone else, I just went from one toxic relationship to the other and most of the time is was all me because I just held onto all the unresolved pain. Being nice to others when having to deal with that kind of abusive past -PTSD - or whatever one wants to call it ... is not just about being nice to others. The shame we feel as byproduct or beaten individuals is soul destroying and takes a lot or work to balance. I stand by what I said in my first post above but now sensing more of an issue with how we victims tend to become vulnerable to ourselves in further relations. Hard to explain but feel I have said enough. I am sorry that many of us have had to endure the beatings and chaos that flows as it does. Look inside and love yourself from whatever point you can and work with that. Perhaps your just not ready for another relationship and in some ways is sounds that way to me. Back it off a little but most of all just be honest to yourself as your doing now and also tell this guy how you feel but from your own point of view. We make great targets during this time which is why I'm feeling a little worried for you ... The nice guy routine regardless of genuine or not can really feed the hurt child within in ways that may not be so helpful if we are still damaged. Often I take the stance the many of us can not be fixed, but that is more about others can't fix us, we can only fix ourselves. It also helps to understand that the level or repair need not be as others tell us or whatever self help books portray. We decide the level at which we are more ourselves and that is key to understand. Others can help and the latter is not black and white ... but if we do not take control of what only we can, then the cycle will just keep repeating no matter how many others wish to help. I think I'll back out of this topic now as I've given my best and there is nothing else I can really say that I have not just said. I know about the shame that wells within that keeps us from enjoying life. I also know how the joy and happiness of others can overwhelm us and how we tend to make for good play things for those that love to fix. It's a dynamic that leads to a pattern in ongoing relations and why it works so well in the market place. That's another story but the point is - we got to be honest with ourselves and own the way we feel and choose the path we take. Good luck. Your welcome to PM
  11. Thank you for sharing this, I think it's common to carry anxiety and PTSD from a past relationship, but not everyone is able to come to terms with or acknowledge that, so you are already on the right path ✨ I entered a new, healthy relationship with some baggage from a previous, less healthy one, and it's not always easy to keep in mind that it's not the same person nor the same relationship. I think what helped me was to be open with my new partner about how my previous relationship had been and what situations might still make me a bit anxious. Hope this helps, and I look forward to seeing what other people say too ?
  12. @Tine Thank you for your detailed response! I've extended week 3 for an additional week as I missed a couple of days along the way and didn't have time to do the readings for the next week either. I had one really 'good' yoga session writing my last comment, where I was determined to be present and accept whatever was there. It almost felt like the body scan and led me to feel more in contact with my body, and I felt a sense of relief afterwards. I had one really 'bad' yoga session that I had to cut short as I got so distracted that I started to think of upsetting things to the point I'd totally tuned out and started crying. And I had one that felt 'pointless' as I felt I was just putting my body in different positions but not paying attention to what I was doing at all. I also tried a different 'yoga for ptsd' practice on a day that was difficult for me and was astonished by how much physically weaker I am when feeling very depressed. I think the best day I had with the prescribed video on this course was when I was feeling very low indeed, and even slight movement was a challenge. It provided maybe just enough of a challenge on those days.. Maybe on days when I'm feeling stronger, it would be good to push myself a little more, in order to keep myself more engaged. I think while I'm following this course, I'll try to follow it to the letter as closely as possible, just to be able to notice how the same practice can feel different on different days. But once I've completed it, I'll select practices that I feel will be the most helpful to me on a given day. Just trying not to waste too much time in the mornings wondering which video would be 'optimal' rather than actually just doing something (a very real challenge with ADHD haha)
  13. As a person that has battled depression for many years, along with anxiety and PTSD I believe that I may be able, finally,, to see all experiences, challenges, difficulties, obstacles and so forth as gifts. I regard myself has a person that walks a spiritual pathway. I also regard myself as a person that has experienced extremes, for example going from a British Army Marksman (I entered the Army straight from school) to a Reiki Practitioner and Spiritual Healer, and Medium, with 26 years in Spiritualism. So for me, I've experienced (as lots of us do, I'm not special) polarity/duality, exploring myself on many levels, physically (in the Army) mentally, through deep soul searching, emotionally and spiritually (in meditation, self reflection. Exploring the extremes of myself, really getting to know myself, at many different levels of being. As I look at life from a spiritual perspective, I do see this (difficult and challenging) life as a gift, an opportunity to come here to this world, enter into the density of the physical form, experience cold, heat, hunger, limitation, isolation, separation , deprivation, love, connection, interaction, joy, bliss and everything else beyond and in between. As I believe that the universe (multiverse) is divinely and intelligently orchestrated. I really do feel that this (and every) life , along with everything we experience within them, is a gift, a gift in the sense that it provides us with the opportunity to really get to know ourselves., each other and to be able to truly empathise with others, having suffered ourselves. We are the brave souls that took the opportunity to really have our metal tested, be forged in the fires down here on the earth, ultimately to return to our true home in the spirit realms, richer and finer through experience, knowing ourselves better than ever before. Life, and everything we experience in it, really is a precious gift! Many applied, but not all were accepted, to return to Earth and assist our earth be uplifted and freed from the clutches of those that would rather see us perish. We are the Light Warriors, here to assist in the ongoing Ascension process, and we will ultimately be triumphant. Life is a gift and one that, at soul level at least, we are very grateful for. Yin/Yang, dark/ light, positive/negative, polarity,/duality ~all necessary to generate movement, momentumand growth, all through experience. Our sensitivities and our self awareness is a gift also, for all the same reasons, as difficult as that may be at times.A great servant once said, and I agree entirely " The Meek shall inherit the earth" Our time is coming friends! Hang in there for just a little while longer, great changes are just around the corner I (very strongly) feel. Namaste.?? The image below is my design that I've drawn out after being inspired with it. I'll be giving it the Pyrography (wood burning treatment) soon ?
  14. "Trauma is anything less than nurturing that changes your vision of yourself and your place in the world" - Michelle Rosenthal Traumatic events can involve single experiences or repeating events that completely overwhelm us to the point where we're unable to cope. I don't think anyone is immune to trauma. Maybe some people just find ways to deal with it better than others. I found this super helpful article that talks about trauma and its effects, and it shares self help tips for those dealing with trauma or traumatic experiences. It also touches on when you should seek professional help, or how you can help a loved one or someone close to you overcome trauma. Read it here https://www.helpguide.org/articles/ptsd-trauma/coping-with-emotional-and-psychological-trauma.htm I'm grateful to have this safe space on happiness.com where I can reach out and connect with others going through similar experiences to facilitate our healing processes together.
  15. happiness at times seems to slip thru my fingers unaccountably. a brief image, a song, a wandering thought - these and more can effect my emotions. so i have found simple things that help create an environment to "attract" happiness. making up my bed w/ fresh sheets. a vase of wildflowers, that i have gathered, adorning my home. buying - and then brewing - my favorite type of tea. taking ten minutes to flip thru one of my most beloved poetry books. playing ball w/ my loyal dog - he is so happy to be playing that i can't help smiling. depression & ptsd and grief trip me up daily, so i trip them w/ my simple pleasures. peace.
  16. NICABM Provides excellent resources on healing and preventing PTSD. Also the book “the body keeps the score” is an excellent Review of the key people in development processes in this regard
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