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I was a journalist at the top of my career with the Australian Broadcasting Corporation when depression and PTSD took hold. I thought my life was over, but I found purpose and self-worth again by volunteering in a school in rural Nepal, 18 months after the earthquakes which claimed 9000 lives. I still have some bad days, but I now live a life of passion and purpose. I love supporting others and lifting people up. Every person has a story to tell and amazing potential.
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Tjanks for youd replies everyone I do not come across on the outside as sad. I'm just sad inside. In fact if people knew that I felt lonely they would think I was the last person who felt this way. And i do lòok after myself I hike everyday meditate and have hobbies bug I believe that humans need connection and community to stay mentally healthy we are social animals and that's what I am lacking despite putting in a lot of effort. It's painful when I hear others have their little groups and I am constantly on the outside. It seems very high-schoolish and r surprised that this kind of thing still exists in our 60s. I am feeling that I have to accept that I won't have those close relationships but wondered if others had this experience and although I do appreciate the advice, believe me, I have pursued and still do carry out self exploration different tactics and self preservation. Regards
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Today I clicked onto another members profile who had responded with a like something I wrote yesterday when I signed up. On his profile was a link to an article that appeared in the Guardian Newspaper digging deeper into research that has discovered that humans are at their most miserable at 47 years old, well 47.2 to be precise. Now this may or not be the day it went to press but the day it came into my awareness is exactly 47 years and 2 months to the day when I was born at Kings College Hospital, London. I would be a churlish man to guarantee nothing outside my control could not unexpectedly dissect my life and pose a threat to me or my wellbeing. But as friends will have picked from me throughout 2019 I have experienced recent changes that were traumatic and brought me to a place where I did not recognise people I thought I knew, up from down, true from false. In a dark moment of being alone and very sad I felt as though I may have been the one who betrayed himself. But inside that dark moment and out from that insight. A deep question had flowered within, if 'I' had been the one who betrayed 'myself' then who was 'I' and who is 'myself' since there is only one of me? This was a very important question to ask myself because the answer was nothing that my mind knew or could answer. My mind had been stumped. While my brain shrugged at its lack of knowledge. That realisation resonated with the awareness that has a very strong connection to my gut and my heart, the still, silent awareness at the core of my being. Conscious who 'I' was, I became witness to my mind and mindful of the thoughts that come and go as my brain presents a conceptual understanding of the world around me intended to help me navigate life's path surviving danger and meeting certain fundamental needs. Having awakened to this new found vista of consciousness and allowed my brain enough time to comprehend what it did not itself have scope to have deduced. I found another answer glowing out from the darkness as blatant and as bright as light. Love, self-love will protect against any instance of self betrayal. So I began to practice meditation more and start to change the relationship with myself generating self-compassion, more self-love and a searching enquiry to better understand my needs, to develop a better language related to the needs we all have. If life is dependant on basic needs being met, and those needs are universal and the same for each individual. Then our greater knowledge of our needs is vital to be sensitive and empathic towards our own efforts to meet them and understand what our instincts are doing when we react when they are not being met or something or someone is obstructing us from what we need. So I listen intently to my emotions, guiding me to meet them and this helps me understand more what may be alive in others, who are in conflict with me or others, when something is or is not being done that results in their needs not being met. Knowledge of ones needs lets me see how this drives people to act. They may not know how to say this non-violently, they may just know that their needs are being frustrated and they are blaming the cause of their anxiety. But all conflict results from a need that is not being met. We can learn a language which allows us to be honest and direct with pin point precision of the way we are feeling, what is alive in us, and with practice you can learn how not to blame others or accuse them of wrongdoing and show them what is happening that is blocking you from what you need to thrive and enrich your life and the lives of others willingly. Out of self-love comes compassion and greater empathy I am sure. Essentially I had more growing to do, and as far as I can work out it looks very like the Universe is my best friend too. Because everything being placed on my journey was showing me exactly what I needed to learn the lessons that I needed to know. I am an extremely grateful embodiment of carbon in consciousness. While I am unable to calculate my worth in a material sense, I can be confidently assured in any given moment, that I, like you, am priceless. Anything, including negative thoughts or anyone suggesting otherwise in the direction of worthlessness is not using the language of non-violent communication they most probably just don't know how to speak it. Whether they are conscious of this or not they are abusing you and not willingly sought to enrich your life, and so it spells the end, it is at odds with your true value, they don't have to see it your way, that is their own deficiency, not yours and so this is the time to walk away from their toxicity don't try to steer someone towards a lesson that the universe is very much in command of, forgive them, when you are ready to not feel hurt by holding the hurt, let it go and say a prayer asking the Universe to bless them with the same kind of insight that I feel I have received. Find the life underneath the life situation, the story of things happening to me and don't identify with the ego's fondness for drama and conflict. Let your life love you back to the you you have always been, you are perfect just as you are without conditions attached. And for me personally the most important person who needed to really know this life lesson has been me. Thank you gorgeous universe for the gift of getting more appreciation of living before I die, and for the amazing gift of being me. Xxx P.S they say from here on in - everything starts to look up! ?
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There is a force in the universe that is active in us, and is a great resource in our quest for a animated life and a conscious world. this force exists and is with us — indeed, it is in us — making use of it hinges on a crucial factor: the nature of your mindset. What’s Wrong with our Mindset? Mindset, This is an embracing concept — it does not stand for a rigorously scientific view, nor does it stand for a purely fictional one. But it does stand for a view of the world that people can recognize as their own. This is an embracing view, encompassing the whole gamut of values and feelings associated with one’s beliefs and convictions regarding the nature of the world. In the current scientific literature, there is a more rigorous but also more limited concept: this is “paradigm.” Originally developed by philosopher of science Thomas Kuhn to describe the fundamental changes in physics wrought by the shift from the Newtonian view of physical reality, to the Einsteinian relativistic view, in the course of the past decades the concept of paradigm has acquired a wider meaning. It extends from the concept of physical reality to a general concept of what we hold to be the nature of reality. We can speak of a materialistic paradigm, a vitalistic paradigm, a classical Newtonian paradigm, or a new quantum-science paradigm. Whether we give it thought or not, we all hold some variety of paradigm, even if it is not consciously recognized and articulated. This is also true of the concept of “mindset.” We all dispose of some variety of mindset, and that mindset is active and influential for us whether we recognize it or not. There is something fundamentally wrong with the mindset of most people in the modern world. That mindset is antiquated and misleading. People holding it are focused on acquiring material goods and fostering their own wealth, power and influence. They adopt a wasteful and often ostentatious lifestyle. They think that individuals have little or no influence on the way the world is going, and so there is no real need for individuals to feel responsible for the way the world is actually going. Life is a struggle for survival, where the fittest survives. Popular wisdom such as “make the most of your opportunities and never mind what comes after you — you only go around once” and “the world out there is a jungle, so take care of your own interests, because nobody else will care for it” are fairly typical examples. This is how the mind of the typical modern person is set to perceive the world. The values and behaviors inspired by the modern mindset have led to critical conditions in our social, economic, and ecological systems. They have fractured the integrity of the human community, dividing it into we and others, drawing the line in reference to common interests, or competing and perhaps opposing interests. This creates competition and conflict, and gives rise to violence. It leads to an unsustainable world. If we the modern mindset doesn’t change and evolve, we endanger not just our own well-being, but the survival of our species, but also we endanger the survival of all beings on planet earth. How to Change Your Mindset — Start with yourself. But how do you go about it? The first step is to ask yourself some fundamental questions. How do you relate to people, society, and nature around you? Are you part of them, or are you outside and perhaps above them? The honest answer you give, testifies to the nature of your mindset. Adopting an up-to-date mindset is not a quixotic endeavor: The shift from competition to reconciliation and partnership: a change from relationships, organizational models, and societal strategies based on competition to relationships and models based on principles of healing, reconciliation, forgiveness, and male–female partnership. The shift from greed and scarcity to sufficiency and caring: a change in values, perspectives, and approaches from the traditional self-centered and greedy mode toward a sense of the sufficient and the interpers onal concern of caring. The shift from outer to inner authority: a change from reliance on outer sources of “authority” to inner sources of “knowing.” The shift from separation to wholeness: a recognition of the wholeness and interconnectedness of all aspects of reality. The shift from mechanistic to living systems: a shift of attention from models of organizations based on mechanistic systems to perspectives and approaches rooted in the principles that inform the world of the living. The shift from organizational fragmentation to coherent integration: a shift from disintegrative, fragmented organizations with parts set against each other to goals and structures integrated, so they serve both those who participate in the organizations and those around them.
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There is a force in the universe that is active in us, and is a great resource in our quest for a animated life and a conscious world. this force exists and is with us — indeed, it is in us — making use of it hinges on a crucial factor: the nature of your mindset. What’s Wrong with our Mindset? Mindset, This is an embracing concept — it does not stand for a rigorously scientific view, nor does it stand for a purely fictional one. But it does stand for a view of the world that people can recognize as their own. This is an embracing view, encompassing the whole gamut of values and feelings associated with one’s beliefs and convictions regarding the nature of the world. In the current scientific literature, there is a more rigorous but also more limited concept: this is “paradigm.” Originally developed by philosopher of science Thomas Kuhn to describe the fundamental changes in physics wrought by the shift from the Newtonian view of physical reality, to the Einsteinian relativistic view, in the course of the past decades the concept of paradigm has acquired a wider meaning. It extends from the concept of physical reality to a general concept of what we hold to be the nature of reality. We can speak of a materialistic paradigm, a vitalistic paradigm, a classical Newtonian paradigm, or a new quantum-science paradigm. Whether we give it thought or not, we all hold some variety of paradigm, even if it is not consciously recognized and articulated. This is also true of the concept of “mindset.” We all dispose of some variety of mindset, and that mindset is active and influential for us whether we recognize it or not. There is something fundamentally wrong with the mindset of most people in the modern world. That mindset is antiquated and misleading. People holding it are focused on acquiring material goods and fostering their own wealth, power and influence. They adopt a wasteful and often ostentatious lifestyle. They think that individuals have little or no influence on the way the world is going, and so there is no real need for individuals to feel responsible for the way the world is actually going. Life is a struggle for survival, where the fittest survives. Popular wisdom such as “make the most of your opportunities and never mind what comes after you — you only go around once” and “the world out there is a jungle, so take care of your own interests, because nobody else will care for it” are fairly typical examples. This is how the mind of the typical modern person is set to perceive the world. The values and behaviors inspired by the modern mindset have led to critical conditions in our social, economic, and ecological systems. They have fractured the integrity of the human community, dividing it into we and others, drawing the line in reference to common interests, or competing and perhaps opposing interests. This creates competition and conflict, and gives rise to violence. It leads to an unsustainable world. If we the modern mindset doesn’t change and evolve, we endanger not just our own well-being, but the survival of our species, but also we endanger the survival of all beings on planet earth. How to Change Your Mindset — Start with yourself. But how do you go about it? The first step is to ask yourself some fundamental questions. How do you relate to people, society, and nature around you? Are you part of them, or are you outside and perhaps above them? The honest answer you give, testifies to the nature of your mindset. Adopting an up-to-date mindset is not a quixotic endeavor: The shift from competition to reconciliation and partnership: a change from relationships, organizational models, and societal strategies based on competition to relationships and models based on principles of healing, reconciliation, forgiveness, and male–female partnership. The shift from greed and scarcity to sufficiency and caring: a change in values, perspectives, and approaches from the traditional self-centered and greedy mode toward a sense of the sufficient and the interpers onal concern of caring. The shift from outer to inner authority: a change from reliance on outer sources of “authority” to inner sources of “knowing.” The shift from separation to wholeness: a recognition of the wholeness and interconnectedness of all aspects of reality. The shift from mechanistic to living systems: a shift of attention from models of organizations based on mechanistic systems to perspectives and approaches rooted in the principles that inform the world of the living. The shift from organizational fragmentation to coherent integration: a shift from disintegrative, fragmented organizations with parts set against each other to goals and structures integrated, so they serve both those who participate in the organizations and those around them.
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My Journey? Hmmm - That's actually a bit too cliché for me but will use what works for others in an attempt to be heard. More often than not I find this world more a place in which people do time. I think now think of Eckhart Tolle and his lectures on the subject: If I may share: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mgj7u86e4wc Perhaps not for everyone. I do tend to find him easy on the ear and have spent a more than a few years being open to his core message with respect to here and now. I think I prefer to deal with depression, anxiety, or other mental health challenges through the process of dis-Identifying. Commonly known in Eckhart's circle as dis-Identifying from the mind. Apparently key to becoming present. I make now claims either way but can only say what works for me and share what I see. Quote: "Simple but now easy" Reminds me of Jon Kabat-Zin whom I first came across on YouTube doing a presentation at Google. The quote that just came to mind somewhere from his book 'Wherever you go there you are.' I sense a sadness in him when watching him now but he handles it well. He is his own master of course with his own box of tools. I'd say that source of sadness comes from the irony of having talked at Google and they being what they are. Can be summed up in an article 'Father of virtual reality: Facebook and Google are dangerous 'behavior-modification empires' resulting from a tragic mistake' Jon tried his best and still does today with the odd online meet and greet. I know his has made a positive influence on me. Me ... I'm a sponge and whilst have a failing memory and struggle cognitively when out and about in a world not designed for me, things that resonate with me tend to last for life. Although this can be said for both negative and positive experiences. For me, I am not into cutting people out of my life on a whim because some article claims that's how I will claim my prize. I find such doctrine as it be, a tact like perhaps what google does when assimilating the knowledge of great speakers like Jon then creating an algorithm to hook people in. Everyone promoting themselves behind a veil of excellence and success sold in many other likewise terms. Kind of like how western society adopts and twist other cultures, religion and philosophy. Why not throw into the mix domination and control? Smiles because it's all so challenging that anyone that talks on such things in todays world is quickly such down in a finely tuned machine that sees automated robot responses from humans all over today's info tech world. Indeed, depression, anxiety, or other mental health challenges abound. Just to be clear, I'm not looking for advice myself. Most of my take and approach is also very challenging but not so much for me. It just fly's in the face of main stream ideals as peddled from the machine. I'm acutely aware though of how my own resistance works against me which is why I find the likes of Tolle, Zin and Watts very compelling. That said, I don't find watts as soothing at Eckhart and Jon. He is a little more blunt but still I find enough gold in his sharing to be helpful for me. Grain of salt until it hits a home run, but then I much prefer revisiting such insights until I can either acknowledge them as my experience or not. I don't care much for the dramatic music played in the background and images pasted over the top. That's more part of the trap the Tolle often talks about and even Watt's himself. Much irony abounds in as much at Jon talking at Google and again it being what it be. In that regard the lycra , iconic images and drama used to profile peoples self promoting journeys is also something I recoil from. Smiles again ... no wonder I prefer small groups. arrr ... Now I think of the Life of Brian. Don't ask how I got there. hehe. I also don't take myself too seriously but also keep things true enough for me when creating my own script. I have no purpose that fits into another group ideal although many would propose in their daily speech. "What do you do for a living?" As if to imply I must be 'doing' something in order to live or whatever. "Keeping Busy?" all the way into the new age group that also ask many questions of others "What have you contributed?" Different dynamics, same patterns. The use of exclamations marks following claims of stillness and peace. Tis a crazy world to be sure full of irony at every turn. Yet there are snippets to be had in every irony to be had. "You shall know them by their fruits." The latter being from a book I consider and no more than a book, yet rings true enough. I don't always throw the fruit out either just because it does not look pretty or not pitch perfect in taste. Sadly it seems out culture today is steering more toward said irony more and more. So sad indeed that it's nice to a section like this in a happiness forum that appears to be open to such things. Each to their own of course. This is my world view from what I have seen, experienced and see and seeing. Although it's worth noting such revelations can be hard to cope with. Especially in a world programmed with such an inherent need for validation and approval. Time for some gardening and to quickly share a pic of what keeps me out of such a chaotic and shallow world - more so what keeps me grounded, brings me solace and peace: Is not about the end result but about the experience. Instead of cutting people out of my life on a whim and gong form relationship to relationship, I make friends with that which does do not use open its mouth or take photos of itself: Again ... we all find happiness in our own way. 🙃 Takes more than a fancy profile, well constructed answers to text book questions to build trust in a world of deception. How's that for non-neurotypical? Oh the labels! ← Notes* first exclamation mark. Well done on the drama. Oh how they hand those labels out and how people cling to them. Forgive my candor here but true enough for yours truly. Such is a bit of an epidemic from what I can see. I choose to be none of them but like so many others jump through the hoops in order that I may have the right to live. But yea ... whatever works. I burnt out the sensor on my wife's camera taking the image bellow. It was cheap tiny compact affordable at the time to replace with the newer one - but how lost I was in the taking of that shot. It was an experience which makes this one of so many years later still my favorite. When I am doing well I enjoy taking these kinds of photos. I find much of the essence in the talks given by those I named above in images like these. I'm only just starting to get back into a cycle where I am considering sharing more of these experiences. Minus my world view of course. These kind of shares tend to convey more in a way that's more digestible. That said, writing in our own way from the heart as we see and breathe is also therapeutic. This is why I am often more my own audience but open to all minds. Even those that are not like mine but get the gist of being more open to those that resonate. I'm just not into cutting out people as commonly sold nor all the other aspects of today's selfish algorithm. This makes me a target by being so open, but then I also get to meet real people otherwise isolated by the things of which I highlight. I'm all for those on the fringes - for all those who have been rejected - yet get the boundaries that others use to reason when taking a less painful route. Until next share - have a nice day.
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That is a worthwhile inquiry as well. What do you miss in the relationship? And maybe it's not even about the relationship - maybe you were insecure and looking for validation from outside. In my experience there's never enough validation from outside to fill the hole if we think something is wrong with us. Maybe what you need is self-acceptance, self-love. ❤️
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ON ABUSE AND "SPIRITUALITY" "You attracted it because you desired it". "If you think there's a problem with another's words or actions, YOU are the one who's confused". "Everything is just your projection. Everything is in your mind". "Clear up your vibration and you'll stop attracting bad things to yourself". "You are too attached to the body. Go beyond the body. It's not who you are." "If you have doubts, fears, resistance, pain, anger, then you must be in your ego and totally unenlightened". "The past is an illusion. Let it go right now!". Ugh. I'm so tired of all this New Age spiritual bullshit. I'm tired of ANY spirituality that doesn't fully honour our messy, unresolvable, first-hand, real-time, embodied human experience. That doesn't bow deeply to the struggle of our raw and tender hearts. That guilt-trips us for our imperfections and shames our limitations. No, it's not always your projection. Yes, sometimes other people really ARE abusive and need to be stopped. No, everything isn't always "in your mind". Yes, your body matters. Your feelings too. No, your doubts and fears are not 'wrong' or 'bad' or 'unevolved'. No, you do not 'attract' abuse through a faulty 'vibrational frequency'. No, you do not deserve to be violated in any way, in the name of Truth, in the name of God, in the name of Love, or IN ANY OTHER NAME. Yes, your boundaries deserve to be respected, your 'yes' AND your 'no' too. No, it's not okay for spiritual teachers to abuse people "for their own good" - to shock them into awakening, to enlighten them, to help them drop their "ego". Teachers that use abuse as a tool are simply abusers, not teachers. I reject any spirituality that dismisses our tender, vulnerable, fragile humanity. I reject any spirituality that shames us for our precious human thoughts and feelings. I reject any spirituality that begins any sentence with "If you were enlightened..." I reject any spirituality that divides self from no self, divine from human, sacred from profane, absolute from relative, heaven from earth, duality from nonduality, material from spiritual. I once saw a popular spiritual teacher addressing a recently bereaved woman. He said, "Your heartbreak is illusory and only the activity of the separate self. One day the separate self will vanish, along with all suffering". And in that moment, I saw a deep, deep sickness and inhumanity at the heart of contemporary spirituality. The invalidation of trauma, the false promises, the power games, the suppression of the feminine. And I vowed to bow to that fucking broken heart as if it were God Herself. Until the end of time. - Jeff Foster
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Well, you can't force or plan to get a relationship. In the past I wished I could, but you just can't. But there are some things one can do to be more attractive. I don't know you at all, so I don't know if this helps you, but here are some things to make a person attractive in my opinion. 1. Take care of yourself. So take a shower on a regular basis, work out and wear some nice clothes. It makes you look healthy and it improves your self esteem. 2. Have a personality. If you don't know your favorite food, your favorite music, your favorite hobby, your favorite restaurant, take your time to find out what you like. Knowing what you want is more attractive than: "Uh, I don't know", in my opinion. When you found an activity/hobby you like, try to find a way to do it together with other people. That's a great way to get to know new people. 3. Be less picky. Some people seem to be perfect, but they all have their problems, weaknesses and insecurities. So give people a chance, go on dates and get to know them. And maybe take a look around you. Do you have a best friend, who is always there for you, who is single too? He/she might be the best partner for you.
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Mine is the Elephant! Elephants appear to have self awareness as well as appearing to show empathy for dying and dead family members. Elephants are also among the species known to use tools. They are popularly thought of as having an excellent memory, are highly intelligent and emotionally complex. Elephants are highly social animals that form close bonds and family units. Fun fact: Just like a dog, when an elephant’s tail is swishing from side to side swatting away flies, it is happy. As soon as the tail goes stiff, it means the animal is anxious. These beautiful, compassionate and emotional creatures are my favorite and I consider them to be my spirit animal.
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I know that feeling. Many people feel incomplete, not normal and unhappy without a partner. I did too. I tried to find a relationship desperately and I thought I was doomed to wait for a random coincidence and to be unhappy meanwhile. It's important to understand the fact that you have to make yourself happy. Don't let your happiness depend on random events. Take care of yourself, find a great hobby, make yourself comfortable, cook nice meals for yourself, dress like the person you would like to be seen as and make yourself happy and confident. I used to cook great meals, buy flowers and dress well for dates, but I didn't do it for myself, because I didn't condider it necessary for just myself. But appreciating yourself is important. You are the most important person in your life. So treat yourself like that. And this behavior of self esteem will attract other people. So the "relationship problem" might just solve itself.
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Mental health wellbeing Garden
KatherineStephenson5 replied to Char 's topic in Introduction Circle - A warm welcome to happiness!
Char, I think your project of starting a mental health wellbeing garden is a wonderful idea. Gardening can have many benefits for people who are struggling with mental health issues, loneliness, or isolation. Here are some thoughts and scriptures that relate and offer support and encouragement to your project: Gardening can help people practice acceptance, gratitude, mindfulness, and hope. It can also reduce stress, anxiety, depression, and anger. It can improve mood, self-esteem, creativity, and cognitive function. It can foster a sense of connection to nature, to others, and to God. Gardening can be a way of expressing God’s love and care for His creation. It can also be a way of receiving God’s love and care for ourselves. God is the ultimate gardener, who planted the first garden in Eden and who makes everything grow according to His plan. Some scriptures that can inspire and motivate you and the people who will join your garden are: Psalm 1:3: “He is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields its fruit in its season, and its leaf does not wither. In all that he does, he prospers.” Isaiah 58:11: “And the Lord will guide you continually and satisfy your desire in scorched places and make your bones strong; and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail.” John 15:1-5: “I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser. Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit. Already you are clean because of the word that I have spoken to you. Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.” 1 Corinthians 3:6-9: “I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth. So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth. He who plants and he who waters are one, and each will receive his wages according to his labor. For we are God’s fellow workers. You are God’s field, God’s building.” Galatians 6:9: “And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.” I hope these thoughts and scriptures will help you get your project underway. I wish you all the best in your endeavor. May God bless you and your garden abundantly. 😊 Sincerely In Christ, Katherine Stephenson -
To letting got of that is not ... so easy. It's burned inside me. It's part of the sympthoms to beeing hardly self-critical. Additionally: "All things you doing are timewasted". First of all I#ve to learn the the biggest part of my laziness, self critical behavior, and fears are an illness. And this... will be very hard, because my whole life it was a normal state for me.
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THE HEALING POWER OF LONELINESS Loneliness is not the absence of connection but the full presence of God and a total experience of the Self. It is total "isolation" which is not isolation at all from the perspective of Infinitude. Loneliness contains its own cure, if we are willing to dive in, courageously, or without any courage at all. The dive is everything. Loneliness is utterly misunderstood in our culture, or rather, it is only understood on a very superficial psychological level. Everyone is running from loneliness, keeping busy just to avoid it, never coming to know and taste its sweet and merciful healing nectar. For many, loneliness is an enemy, something shameful to be avoided or covered up at all costs. We reach outwards, habitually, automatically, unconsciously, just to keep our distance from loneliness, just to avoid the deafening silence at the heart of all creation. We fill our time and senses up, addict ourselves to projects, create false personas on social media, try to stay “connected” as much as we can, never letting ourselves rest, to avoid the “void” and the gaping chasm of loneliness. But in its terrifying depths, loneliness is not harmful or shameful at all; it is a highly misunderstood spiritual experience of Oneness with all creation, a full and life-giving immersion in the staggering beauty – and utter horror - of life itself, a deep and timeless connection to all living things. Loneliness is not an emptiness but a full presence and an abundance of life. It is pure potential and freedom and surrender all at once, but as long as we are running from it we will never know its nourishing, healing and transformative powers. Loneliness is not a negative state or some mistake in our being or biology, it is inherent in existence itself, built-in ontologically to our very consciousness and it transcends the psychological story. It is connection, not disconnection. It is wholeness, not lack. Loneliness is a naked spiritual state and subsumes all other states. It is an utter letting go, a paradigm of pure receptivity and perfectly tender openness. It is the ground of being itself, and the base of our subjectivity. We run from it at our peril. Nobody can experience our joys and sorrows for us. Nobody can live for us and nobody can die for us. Nobody can experience our own subjective reality, see what we see, feel what we feel, experience what we experience, love what we love, heal from what we need to heal from. We can act as witnesses for one another but we cannot enter each other’s subjectivity or breathe for each other or process each other’s pain. We exist in utter aloneness and uniqueness always, and this is true even when we are in deep connection and relationship. Our ability to relate authentically has its roots in our profound loneliness, and this is what makes every connection with another being such a miracle. When we run from our loneliness, we run from the miraculous and we run from ourselves. Without loneliness, we exist in utter spiritual poverty, no matter how 'evolved' we believe we are. Loneliness is a journey we must take alone. Like falling in love, or like dying, we must fall, without protection and without guarantees. Loneliness is the artist in the midst of creating something utterly new, the scientist on the verge of a breakthrough. Loneliness is the woman crying out on her deathbed, the child being born, the spiritual seeker kneeling prostrate before the ordinary world, the adventurer forging a new path in the dark forest. Loneliness is a risk, but utterly safe. Loneliness is the heart of trauma but it is a loving heart after all. Loneliness feels like shame and total abandonment from the perspective of the mind but for the soul loneliness is a full encounter with the timeless mystery of creation and an utter celebration of all there is. Loneliness takes us out of our minds. It breaks us, grinds us down to our essence, erodes us back to purity and innocence and beauty, brings us close to death but then rebirths us, stronger and more courageous than ever before. Its terror breaks our defences and, then, vulnerable and soft and open, we re-enter the world, more sensitive to its beauty, more aware of the fragility of form and more tender towards the ache of humanity. We don’t always know if we can endure loneliness, but we do. When we are in loneliness, it is total and all-consuming and even time recedes. Everything disappears into loneliness - it is like a black hole, and we don’t know how long we can survive its ferocious embrace. But we are stronger than we know and we endure it beautifully. Through meeting our own loneliness and letting it touch us deeply, and ravage us, and cleanse us, and renew us, we come to know directly the loneliness of all beings, their yearning for the light, their deep ache for God, their search for home. We recognise others more deeply as ourselves. Loneliness makes us look beyond appearances and touch the depths of the world soul. If we have truly plumbed the depths of our own loneliness, we can never again close our hearts to the loneliness of others, to the yearning of their humanity, to the horror and awe of creation itself. Loneliness breaks us open to a devastating compassion for all things, it matures us spiritually and increases our empathy a thousand-fold. We become more caring, more compassionate, more deeply considerate. We become more able to look into the eyes of another without shame or fear. We become less able to turn away where we see suffering and pain. We value our connections more deeply than ever before. Each friendship is a miracle. Each moment with a family member, or partner, or stranger, takes on a strange new melancholic beauty. We become more fearlessly alive in our dying. We embrace paradox as a lover and a friend. Loneliness is the gravity of love, a sacred pull into the heart core. Loneliness brings with it a sense of rest and contentment, a deep inner happiness and satisfaction. It slows us down to a snail’s pace and breaks our addiction to the clock and to second-hand notions of "success". It makes us less distracted, less restless, less manipulative, more content with the present moment. The black hole in our guts becomes our unexpected church, our solace, our sanctuary and our mother, and the source of all our genuine answers. We listen to our loneliness and it brings unexpected gifts. New creativity and new inspiration pours out of the lonely place inside. New music comes from there, new and unexpected words, new desire and new paths to follow. Loneliness is the source of all great art, music, poetry, dance, and all works touched by authentic loneliness are authentic works filled with truth and humility and the light of life itself. The nectar of God pours through the broken place inside. Loneliness crucifies us yet shows us that we cannot be crucified. We do not lose ourselves in loneliness. We find ourselves there more clearly and directly than ever. Loneliness is the experience of pure intimacy with the senses. It is the erotic experience of being fully alive. It is Jesus on the cross. It is the pulsating ache of a universe longing to be born. It is the end of all things, and a new beginning. It is holding a friend’s hand, not knowing how to help them, not knowing how to take away their suffering, but giving our heart to them totally. It is facing our own death, no promises, no guarantees, no story anymore. Loneliness is the Beloved beckoning us. Those who have let themselves touch the black hole of loneliness, those who have given themselves up to its relentless pull, who have let the darkness penetrate and infuse and shake and reawaken them, are unmistakable beings. They have a depth and a strength of character that others lack. They radiate genuine warmth and understanding. Their melancholy is the fount of their greatest joy. They are not content with surface things any longer. They have been broken but they are playful too, and full of humour. They love the night-time as much as the day, the shadows as much as the light, the wolf as much as the songbird. Their not-knowing is the source of their wisdom. Their spirituality is simple. They hold no dogma anymore. They have become like little children once more. They are poets and artists and wild lovers of the night. Loneliness is the experience of being in a body, but not of a body, and knowing that all things will pass, that all loved ones will die, that nothing lasts, that everything is made of the most delicate substance. Loneliness is a deep and unshakeable awareness of the transience and brevity of things, of illness and endings and new beginnings. Loneliness is a love of the night-time, the shadows and the moon. It is present in every moment and saturates every hour of every day. Once you have tasted loneliness, truly sipped from its sacred fount, you cannot run away from it ever again. You are haunted by it, yet you know it is the friendliest of ghosts. Loneliness opens your heart wider than any other experience ever could. It brings with it youth and innocence. It makes you weep at the sight of sand on the beach, or the sound of a baby crying, or the feel of the morning sunlight on your skin, or upon the contemplation of time itself. Loneliness takes us to our most painful places but helps us fulfil our highest potential. Without loneliness, we are just shells of human beings, frightened skeletons. Loneliness fills us up with warmth from the inside, gives our lives the deepest kind of purpose and direction and meaning. Loneliness makes us realise we are never alone, and we are always loved, despite our imperfections and lack of faith. Loneliness is a religious experience, a lovemaking with the Universe. Loneliness will save you if you give yourself to it totally. It will not separate you from the world and others but will bind you to them more powerfully. Through the dread and devastation of loneliness you will discover that you are more vast and more capable of love than you ever thought possible. You will be shocked at how much life you can hold. The more you run from loneliness, the lonelier and lonelier you will feel, and the more you will fear being alone, even if you are surrounded by people. In loneliness is the utter paradox and mystery of creation. It may be last place you want to touch in yourself, and it may sound like madness, what I am saying to you here. But your loneliness may hold all the secrets to your very existence. You may find that your loneliness is not “loneliness” at all, in the end – it is your umbilical cord to God, unbreakable, infinite, death-defying, a cosmic pathway of love and forgiveness and utter, utter humility. Let your loneliness pierce you, then, and shake you, and nourish you, and let it connect you to the world - and your authentic self - more deeply than ever. - Jeff Foster
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Hi all, I'm a new member and I am glad to be here. Since the recent lockdowns prompted by the pandemic in UK and around the world I have been exploring the idea of alternative health in combating stress and anxiety and their immediate effects such as tiredness, insomnia, eating disorder and other mental health issues. I find that meditation is an excellent alternative health method and that I don't have to keep taking prescription medicine for common stress and anxiety. I am currently considering the self hypnosis techniques using positive affirmations. Any recommendations from the forum on books or audios on self hypnosis is appreciated and I will keep the forum updated on my journey into guided meditation and hypnosis.
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My whole life since my childhood I never had felt any warmness of love and acceptance ,since then I was struggling to love my self and I had a low self esteem.I was afraid to create strong relationship bonds and getting closer to people because on my mind I always thought that I Will always be rejected,feeling unloved and betrayed.My life changed when I encountered Jesus Christ through God,developing a personal relationship with God allowed me to surrender and heal from my past experiences,I started to open up my heart and I felt an unexplainable love with a warm feeling that I never felt ever since.My life changed and I began to love God;myself,my loved ones as well as other human beings,it was that easy hence my heart was flowing with living water and filled with love..I am still in the process of healing and God is still restoring and manifesting..It Is all possible with God..Your life could change for the better forever..Allow God which leads to light,joy,peace and love..If you really wanna know about true love try this God who loves you even when you dont ....I still have more to share..Be blessed..
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In this 1971 Center For Disease Control handout photo, monkeypox-like lesions are shown on the arm and leg of a female child in Bondua, Liberia. CDC | Getty Images Belgium has become the first country to introduce a mandatory 21-day quarantine for monkeypox patients as cases of the disease — typically endemic to Africa — spread across the globe. Health authorities in Belgium introduced the measures Friday after the country reported its third case of the virus. As of Monday, the country has recorded four local cases; confirmed global infections currently number around 100. Belgium’s compulsory measures apply only to patients with a confirmed infection. Close contacts are not required to self-isolate but are encouraged to remain vigilant, especially if in contact with vulnerable people. “Infected persons will have to go into contact isolation until the injuries have healed (they will receive concrete instructions about this from the treating doctor),” a version of the government announcement translated from Dutch said. The UK meanwhile has said those who have a high risk of catching the disease should self-isolate for 21 days. That includes household contacts or medical professionals who may have come into contact with an infected patient. What is monkeypox? Monkeypox is a rare disease caused by the monkeypox virus — part of the smallpox family — with symptoms including rashes, fever, headaches, muscle ache, swelling and backpain. Though typically less severe than smallpox, health experts are growing concerned about the genesis of a recent outbreak, starting in early May, in countries beyond Central and West Africa. Health authorities, including the US Centers for Disease Control and infection and the UK’s Health Security Agency, said they have noted a particular concentration of cases among men who have sex with men, and urged gay and bisexual men in particular to be aware of any unusual rashes or lesions. As of Saturday, the World Health Organization reported there were 92 cases in 12 countries, and a further 28 suspected cases under investigation. The US, UK, Canada, Australia, Germany, France, Italy, Spain, Sweden, Belgium, Portugal and Netherlands have all confirmed cases. In this Centers for Disease Control and Prevention handout graphic, symptoms of one of the first known cases of the monkeypox virus are shown on a patient?s hand May 27, 2003. CDC | Getty Images The public health body said recent reported cases had no links to travel from endemic African countries, which is unusual for the disease. It usually spreads via human-to-human or human-to-animal contact. “Epidemiological investigations are ongoing, however, reported cases thus far have no established travel links to endemic areas,” the WHO said in a statement posted on its website Saturday. “Based on currently available information, cases have mainly but not exclusively been identified amongst men who have sex with men (MSM) seeking care in primary care and sexual health clinics,” it added. More monkeypox cases likely The recent surge in community cases, particularly within urban areas, is now raising concerns of a wider outbreak. “To have it appear now — more than 100 cases in 12 different countries with no obvious connection — means we have to figure out exactly what’s happening,” Seth Berkley, CEO of global vaccine alliance Gavi, told CNBC Monday. “The truth is we don’t know what that is and therefore how severe it’s going to be. But it’s likely that we’re going to see more cases,” he said. Though most cases of monkeypox are mild and typically resolve within two to four weeks, there is currently no proven vaccine. The smallpox vaccine has proven 85% effective in preventing infection, and some countries have already begun stockpiling doses. Berkley cautioned that the new outbreak, occurring even as the existing coronavirus pandemic is “not over yet,” was a warning to authorities to invest more resources into infectious diseases. He was speaking at the World Economic Forum in Davos, Switzerland, where political and business leaders have gathered this week to discuss key global issues, including pandemic preparedness. “This is evolutionarily certain that we’re going to see more outbreaks,” he said. “That’s why pandemic preparedness is so important. Look at what it can do economically when you have a pandemic hit” CNBC Health & Science Read CNBC’s latest global coverage of the Covid pandemic: #Belgium #country #introduce #mandatory #monkeypox #quarantine #global #cases #rise Belgium becomes first country to introduce mandatory monkeypox quarantine as global cases rise;
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Hate to break it to you, but Jesus wont come to save you...but the good news is, He did show you how to save yourselves...thinking that Jesus will come down one day and save you is just lazy thinking and lame excuse not to work on your own self. The fact is: All souls live on forever, there is nothing to be saved from, except from your own fears, hate, ignorance, illusions and ego...which always leads to death. You can follow standard christian route: follow the commandments, be obedient, be good, wait on Jesus, grow old... die and be reborn.. Or, you can walk the Christ's talk: master yourself, be great, be glorious, ascend and achieve salvation of your own accord through your own self-mastery. Nobody will raise you to heaven for you, nor will he trow you to hell. All you are doing you are doing to yourself. Don't let any religious people spill some bs that you are sinner, or that you need someone in order to save yourself. You have all it takes, you are enough, you are holy child of God, and God who is your greatest helper is always with and within you. Upon death, all souls return to heaven from whence they came, but this is not what Jesus meant by Eternal Life, yes Eternal Life is the Truth, and we all go on forever, but ASCENSION is the ATTAINMENT of Eternal Life, while still in body, rather than dying. The promised land and eternal life which all the holy scriptures talk about is Ascension, it is to overcome death, it is to raise your consciousness to high heavenly frequency and become one with God while here in flesh. Once you ascended, there is no more death. no more birth, you are your Higher Ascended, Christ-Like, God-Like, perfect Self, a Holy Son of God. And power, life, light, love, wisdom and generosity, compassion, kindness and understanding of Supreme Spirit, becomes your own. This is what Jesus had known, this is why He was Son of God, he lived up to the Truth of His being, he reached that higher frequency of Higher Self, He was God in flesh, and so are you, you just don't know it...yet. So, will you give all of yourself to find the Truth, to know who you are, or will you waste your days waiting on death? For that is what you are doing if you are not seeking the Truth, the Way, the Life, and the Light of your own Being. “Many are called but few are chosen” means that everyone is called but only few care to listen, and only a handful choose to answer the call of God. Question is, what will you do? It up to you, and no one else.. If you don't know what to do, then for the start: raise volume/vibe/frequency through Love to the ------------------------[] max. That's a good start. Cheers
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There are many things you can do, and it's also pretty individual what works for you. Being here and posting this question in the forum is a first step on your journey ? I would suggest you check out our Academy where you find lots of great courses on self development. Perhaps you'd like the 21 day mindfulness challenge for example ? You can also read more about personal growth and self management in the Magazine, and I'm sure you'll get some more advice here from others who wants to share their own experiences. Remember to be gentle and patient with yourself, self love is so important and a big part of working on your personal growth. ?
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New beginning at Happiness
Lizzie replied to Arun1412 's topic in Introduction Circle - A warm welcome to happiness!
A big welcome to happiness Arun, and thank you for sharing a bit about yourself 🙂 It sounds like you are already embarking on a journey of self development, which is great! The fact that the article resonated with you and you too action by signing up is already a big step 🪴 A good way of making connections in our community is to be active in the forum. Feel free to start new topics if you have other things to share or questions to ask, and definitely chime in and give your advice or thoughts on any topic you see that you find interesting. We are still a fairly small community, but this is a safe and friendly space to be your authentic self! ✨ -
There is a difference between insecurity and modesty and there is a difference between being too self-confident and showing off. I've been insecure for a long time and I don't see the advantage of it. It stops you from taking opportunities. If you are too self-confident, it will adjust by itself, because you will try something you are not capable to do and then you know better. But this way, you learn your limits and it is good to know your limits. But if you are talking about modesty, I totally aggree with you. Nobody likes a show-off.
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Love the name!!! I have just joined after researching about light workers & empaths. My mum told me years ago that I was a light worker and I just shrugged it off thinking she was being weird again 😆. I have also been called an Empath and a therapist once told me I had a lot of empathy!! Just been on an emotional rollercoaster after what we call March Madness or Mental March, as we have so many family birthdays that month but this month was particularly stressful as a couple of family members were having a hard time at high school and it triggered some past mini traumas in myself. I have been on a self improvement journey for many years now, mainly to build up my self confidence. However,I feel drawn to learning more about light workers after reading an article I could really relate too. What is a kundalini awakening (I need to research this myself) or what was your experience? This is the 3rd time I've heard these words this week, I'm now fascinated xx💓xx
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I am a empath a healer in those lost in the dark due to heart break and evil of others. I am a listener and healer and have guided a choose few that I felt potential and purity that didn't belong in the darkness. I can't say I can help everyone but I know I have helped the few I choose to be there healing guide. As if you are aware it can be taxing to one's self being a healer so yes I may sound biased but I won't heal everyone only those that are pure and the darkness shouldn't have a hold on.
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About Me and You
Lizzie replied to CharleeisPure772 's topic in Introduction Circle - A warm welcome to happiness!
A warm welcome to happiness 🌈 I hope you find our community helpful on your journey and wish you a wonderful day! I found a bunch articles in our Magazine that could be useful in terms of self acceptance and self love 🙏- 1 reply
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Hi, I hope everyone is having a blessed day so far. Come into this topic and talk about you. What do you want me to know? I am a teenager with so many siblings and anxiety. I used this app in order to help me with self appreciation and self care. Come and explain yourself.
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