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For me simpler means "less". The other day my mom gave me a cheese grater. I said I don't need it, because I have one of these rectangular graters with many different graper functions and it also can grate cheese. So I gave the other one to a friend who just moved to the country and didn't have one. My mom was upset about that and said: "I know you have one already but i wanted to give you a prettier one." I tried to explain that this grate example (or greater haha) symbolizes my philosophy of life. If I have two things that fulfil the same purpose, I have to think and choose which one I use. If I only have one, I safe energy, thoughts, and the decision-making process. Of course, a grater is just a small thing but the little decisions add up if we have 20 instead of two pair of shoes, one hat we really like and not five that don't exactly fit. So for me "simpler" means less. (And it's so hard to live simple because my mom gives me presents all the time ??? - any advice on that?)

Until we're out of. Time - An Ode An unfathomable deity Created us from dust For no apparent reason But to learn and blindly trust Or maybe evolution Became this human group A billion years in making From nothing more than soup Well dear friends it matters not Which perspective you subscribe We are indeed all sentient With a spirit as our guide Cause it's not about where we're from It's our purpose we must find Sharing all our blessings Until we're out of time ❤ Sany

Over the last week, I've been introduced to some extraordinary tools that have been absolutely vital in my own personal pursuit and I'd like to share these tools with you. What does happiness truly look like? For myself, I am happy in improving my life at the moment. That has been my main focus right now. I'm still struggling to define what sorts of actions make me happy, but for now, diving into my psychology and doing the things necessary to improve myself, brings me happiness. For example, I'm just now getting into a program that is going ot help me pay back my college loans that are currently in default. The whole program will take 9 months to get me out of default status and a further 2 years to eliminate my owed debt entirely. I often find myself being impatient with this, however. 9 months is a long time and I really want to get back into school, I'm looking to take up welding as a profession. Enter the first tool I've recently learned Patience. A lot of the things that bother me are not in my control at this moment and that's ok. The general idea is to try to moderate your emotional investment. The hardest part of every journey is the very beginning and often times we tend to quit just before hitting the knee of the growth curve. This is because we emotionally exhaust ourselves and by the time we are just a few days, a few weeks maybe, away from that knee of the curve, that we just simply are drained completely and just quit. But had we taken the time to apply the principles of patience, the return would vastly outweigh the initial investment. So if you are struggling with this area like I do. Try asking yourself these 3 questions, apply them to your own specific circumstances. 1. What does a lazy approach look like in this endeavor? Could be school, a relationship, work, self actualization, maybe you're depressed and anxious and you're just wanting those results. So ask yourself, what a lazy approach would look like. To be lazy would be to do nothing, right? You're not putting in the effort, you're not doing the work etc. 2. What does an impatient approach look like in this endeavor? We all get impatient. It's only natural. We want results and we want them now. But that is a double edged sword. You can end up causing more harm than good. Maybe you're trying to take on ALL the tasks, maybe you're trying to cramp ALL the information, trying to do ALL the work. But you have to allow yourself to moderate how you invest your energy. Take the time to do each step, apply each step, learn each step etc. 80-90% of the emotional labor of any endeavor is going to be in those beginning phases and you're not going to see much growth. You'll see tiny bits of growth here and there. You gotta learn to appreciate those tiny growths and stop looking at the end result as an ends to a means. 3. What does a wise approach look like in this endeavor? So exactly what does this mean? How do we know what a wise approach is? It's actually pretty simple. A wise approach is giving yourself the time to grow, even when the growth doesn't seem to actually be there. Find it, appreciate it, enjoy it. Are you working towards that great relationship that's going to last the rest of your life? Are you writing a book that could change humanity? Are you starting your own business? Are you doing personal development? Any of these things and more are going to take time. It's going to take consistent effort on your part and your job is to try to make the best of the hardest parts of that journey. Ask yourself a few follow up questions. 1. Would this endeavor be worth it, if it took 4x as long as you initially planned? 2. Would this endeavor be worth it, if it took 100 to 1000 times the emotional investment as you planned? If you're working on something like meditation, mastering your emotions, chasing that wonderful relationship, starting your own business, writing a book etc. The answer to both of these questions should be yes. It is absolutely worth the investment because when it comes time to reap the rewards, it's going to be far surpassing anything you had conceived. If the answer is no, perhaps you're either not invested and maybe that project isn't for you, or perhaps it could be your own neurotic mindset, getting in your way. You have to be the judge on that. Moving forward there are 5 simple things that you need to stop allowing to influence your happiness. Just bear in mind, this works hand in hand with the previous tool. Results aren't going to be immediate and that's ok. 1. Your past We all have a past and it can sometimes be pretty murky at best. This includes things others have done to hurt you, things you've done to hurt others, things you've done to hurt yourself, bad choices and mistakes, all the things that made you who you are. You are not those things, you are you. So stop labeling yourself with the ghosts of the past. 2. Your relationships This could be friendships, relationships, family etc. This doesn't mean that any of these things were bad or are bad. Maybe you've had wonderful relations with pretty much everyone you know. It's still equally important to not base your happiness around those relationships. Relying on others to provide our happiness for us is a very clingy and neurotic way of living and chances are, it will ruin that relationship. 3. Your own limited beliefs Have you ever criticized yourself? Said "there's no way I can do that"? Having realistic expectations of what you expect from life is good, but when you begin to say you cannot because of past experience or because of some arbitrary limitation you put on yourself, it becomes an issue. Say for example, you're an introvert that wants to make friends. A stereotypical label that you might put on yourself is that it's not in your nature to make friends or that you can't have friends because of that introverted nature. Let go of that. Maybe you think you won't get that job because you view yourself as a failure. Maybe you feel like you won't get that job because you're not good enough. Maybe you feel like your business won't succeed because you're not a good leader. Whatever it is that you put on yourself. Maybe you think you can't succeed because of your physical appearance or your gender or your skin color. All of these are self defining labels that cause so much detriment in our lives. 4. Other people's opinions of you Just as equally as the way we label ourselves, if we allow others to tell us who we are or what we can be, it is that same detrimental outcome as if we had labeled ourselves, because we are in a sense. We accept the labels that other people put on us. The goal is to stop doing that. Even when they do so with good intentions. 5. Money We all know that money makes the world go round. But the illusive chase of just money is a cold and primal way of living often leaving a person to appear as cold and heartless. I'm not saying to just go and quit your job or that money is evil. What I'm saying is that money shouldn't be the ONLY motivator in your life. It's reasonable to want to be capable of sustaining yourself, a family, having the possessions you want and all that. Just don't be so focused on it that you lose sight of everything else. It's the easiest, fastest track to a toxic life. So that's it! Now the only objective left is to find what actually makes you happy. Go out and try new things, pick up a new hobby, give it 4 weeks. Be patient and approach it as though you want to enjoy it, because that is the purpose of this whole endeavor after all. Not everything is going to strike your fancy and that's ok, at least you tried and now you know.

I started meditating in 2014 after coming across more and more studies suggesting it's a positive effect on the mind, thoughts, emotions and our mental but also bodily health. So I was first convinced to try it by science. A few months after having done my first MBSR course (The same we offer here for free btw) I was blown away by the profound changes that had happened over time and were only really visible in hindsight. As I dug deeper into the science and worked on my personal practise that's when for me also the spiritual side started coming more into focus with questions about purpose, boundaries, morals, ethics, service, ... I practice daily, mostly insight meditation and loving kindness. Some days I allow myself to let a few minute checks in count as "having meditated" too.

I don't think you can make yourself become enlightened. Also keep in mind not everyone will achieve enlightenment. Personally I think, if one hasn't experienced a dark night of the soul there is no way you are awake. That is the path one must take usually it's a path discovered by accident. Dark night of the soul begins the moment you realize one,several, but usually it's all things you believed was true is a fraud. It shakes your core value and belief system to the core! You become severely depressed because you realize all your life you have been lied to and you now have to readjust every aspect of you life in accordance. The way you think and operate no longer works with the knowledge you know. It even questions your identity and purpose. In fact you have to change these things because by you making different choices to navigate this time makes you a different person. When you try to confide in people 95% look at you crazy and are dismissive and even defensive causing you to feel isolated and fustrated. I think the media has romanticized enlightenment as you go to a retreat or nature and you have and epiphany and that's not it at all. It's not gentle at all. The light at the end of the tunnel is the dark night of the soul passes it may take months or years. The actual enlightenment part is when you are researching answers consulting gurus and actually applying the new way of thinking,acting,being. You notice a shift in you life. you find balance again. The new you is stronger,wiser, better,calmer. You have an advangtage, I'm not sure if that is the word I want to use, over most of the population. You are illuminated while the rest are sleep

Hello everyone! Jigna here, I have just joined the site and still learning/navigating/reading about it. I am here to find my purpose, my hobbies which lead to my utmost career where I feel passion in it. I am here to meet likeminded people and make friends too. Namaste Jigna x

I have to agree! I woke up on the first day of this year with a huge sense of purpose and opportunity. I realised that every day is a new opportunity to be great hehe Also, @Calvin77really inspired me with his daily meditation practice, which I have since adopted, and it's making a big difference in my mood, my energy and my overall sense of being. I also aim to get more sun (I don't like leaving my apartment, except to go to work, but I'm working on it ?), eat less sugar and have less screen time (kinda hard when you work online). Let's keep each other motivated!

I'm new here and trying to find motivation. I need to find a purpose to my life after a horrendous year alone. Life has hit rock bottom and now its time to start the climb. New year, New direction. Up!

Hello Friends, Since it is the new year and a time that many people choose to refine and change their life goals, I would like to recommend to you some ideas and tools related to mind mapping. I am very much a visual thinker, but also I am very detail oriented. I have a hard time in my head of translating the fine details or the small goals into the bigger picture of where I am going. For me, this makes a very difficult and sometimes confused bog of too many ideas for me to sort out. I also tend to be a little hypomanic in my idea creation, so you can only imagine maybe the inspired ideas that I have which are fractured by scattered energy if I cannot put myself on a course of solid direction and keep finding my way back to that path. A mind map is a way of connecting ideas. It's a great way to brainstorm or turn the seed of an idea into a plan. It's a wonderful tool for writers to organize stories. Mind maps can be tools of collaboration for managers and creative business people. Here are a few examples of companies that offer websites and or apps. But there are dozens of free and paid apps for this purpose. A good example of a career which uses mind maps is the film industry and it's usage of story boards. A mind map can be as simple as cut out pictures or text from a magazine used to create a vision board which is a very specific kind of mind map, or very intricate ones with multiple levels such as those that organize the plot of a novel. Many of the websites and apps offer free templates if it is hard for you to get started. Here is an example (see pic below) which is a life plan template I made on the website mindmeister. But they can be a simple list of goals with or without pictures. I take the plan I have created each year and revise it. I am sure to mark for my own satisfaction things which I have completed. What I have found is that when you are stuck in a rut of feeling like you are going nowhere, that just having short, medium, and long ranged (even crazy unrealistic long range) plans acts like ”The Power of Positive Thinking” or a subconscious influence on our direction.

I read a lot of New Years Resolutions yesterday. Many said, "If you are releasing people yearly, the problem isn't the others it's you. Went to bed and woke up this morning with a sense of loneliness. Ego had crept in before I could catch it. Reminding me,"It's a New Year and you still single. You start off EVERY year single. Maybe if you pretend to be someone other than you, you MIGHT find you a man in 2020. Blah blah blah blah blah". Ego is ALWAYS trying to get me to do or be someone "I AM" not: in hopes of controlling me by controlling my emotions. In 2018 I started to embrace the process of releasing my EMOTIONAL attachments to things, people, and situations. I'd experienced so many negative emotions over the years: crying, loneliness, hurt, anger, depression, etc etc etc. It was clear my choices were not working, I started searching for alternative solutions. Along the way, I discovered EVERYTHING is energy: including my emotions. I learned every emotion I feel is felt within me first, then transmitted without. Eventually these emotions manifests as my current life situations. I took a closer look at my life, and saw clear examples, along my journey, where my thoughts and emotions are, in fact, energy vibrations that manifested into my reality. I started letting go of old belief systems: it was clear they weren't working for "Me". I let go of belief's that NO longer served "Me". I OWNED the fact that I had allowed my thoughts and emotions to have their way with "Me". I admitted to "Self" that what I feel has NO-THING to do with anyone or anything outside of "Me": those are simply excuses used by me to play the role of victim! I looked at who I had become and was stunned to discover, I wasn't "BE-ING" true to "my-SELF". Why would I do this to me-aka-self? I was faced with the reality that I had LOST control of "me-SELF". I have no recollection of when this actually occurred. Far back as I can recall I had NEVER really been in control of "me-SELF". Thoughts and emotions were ALL I'd ever known. I'd never questions where the thoughts OR emotions came from: they'd always, kinda just, existed. These thoughts and emotions were who "I" was. Every event in my life, from conception, until 2018 was who "I" knew as "me-SELF". Yet, I stilled questioned, "Why would I do this to "me-SELF"'? "I" knew who "I" was. "I" was born February 4th. "I" was baptized twice. "I" lost my virginity. "I" fell in love. "I" got my heart broken. "I had a baby". "I" fell in love again. "I" got my heart broken again. "I" am a mother. "I" am a student. "I" am a graduate. "I" am an employee. "I" am a business owner. I KNEW who I was! Why the question, why'd I do this to "me-SELF"? Who is "me-SELF"? I had allowed thoughts and emotions to roam freely and these TWO were who "I" became. "I" is my alter "Ego". When decisions are made, I say "I" made them. "I" will buy a house! (Thought) "I" felt excited at closing! (Emotion) "I" can't wait to get married! (Thought) "I" met my soul-mate, "I" love him! (Emotion). "I" will lose 10lbs (Thought) "I" am ecstatic, "I" lost 70lbs! (Emotion). "I" thought he loved me. (Thought) "I" feel depressed! (Emotion). I don't know if this will work. (Thought) I knew it wouldn't work, "NOW" I am angry (Emotion). Over time, thoughts became negative because "I" was NOW identified with things, people, and situations. "I" understood it controlled emotions and "me-SELF" was no where to be found. "I" began to either live in the past or future: it's how "I" controlled emotions. Needless to say, where ever thoughts go, emotions flows. Whenever "I" felt like it was losing control, "I" would re-live past situations. It's purpose? To evoke emotions: like loneliness, hurt, anger, and depression as distractions, in order to keep It's control over "emotions". What I found most interesting was that "I" would also use future thoughts as controlling mechanisms as well; thoughts like: When I get a better job (future Thought), It will feel good to be able to afford a house (future Emotion). When I lose 70 (future Thought), I will feel better wearing nicer clothes and traveling to different countries (future Emotion). When I feel better, (future Thought), I'll spend more time, having fun, with my family (future Emotion). I literally pinched myself to make sure "I" was not actually doing the thinking. "I" would NEVER expose itself and risk losing control. So, where were these "NEW" thoughts coming from? Could it be there's more to the question of "Who is me-SELF"? DING DING DING: the lights came on upstairs (laughing). "I" is not "me-SELF". "I" is ego. It's simply my thoughts combined with my emotions in every moment in time. After all, I AM ALWAYS thinking, AM I not? Which means there is ALWAYS an emotional flow for every thought I have. Wow, this was so exciting for "Me"! I stumbled across an amazing discovery. I learned "I" wasn't "me-SELF". As quickly as the bulb lit it up, quickly dimmed once again! I had a fleetly thought: this is the definition of Polarity. Lit = Dim. As quickly as the thought came, it receded and the question it-self remained: If "I" am "Ego" and NOT emotions, who in the world is me-SELF? But wait! What was the quick fleeting thought "I" had about polarity? Something about: Lit = Dim. Could polarity apply to "I" and "me-SELF" as well? Why NOT? Isn't everything polarity? Hot=Cold, Sick=Well, Poor=Rich, Sad=Happy, White=Black. "I" ego = me-"SELF" "I" = "me" "Ego" = "Self" Holy shit! I excited yelled, could "me-SELF" be my EMOTIONS?! Could me-SELF control thoughts? Wouldn't that still equate to polarity? Ego loosening it's negative grips on emotions and emotions consciously radiating positive feelings back Ego in return. WOW: "I" ego and me-"SELF" both occupying the same body, MINE! "I" ego was in control and NOW me-"SELF" has awakened and joined "I" ego within. Does this means there are more at play NOW that "me-SELF" has consciously re-joined "I"? I couldn't help it, I felt butterflies in the pit of my stomach. "I" had an emotional reaction at the though of "SELF" being an equally opposing force to "EGO". Is this the Inner Battle all the GREAT Enlightened Masters eluded to? The battle between I and ME = EGO and SELF! Good and Evil, Right and wrong, sickness and health, weak and strong, poverty and wealth. If there is a battle, who wins? I AM thinking that depends on where "I" choose to focus both my thoughts and emotions............

My name is Jeremy. 40 years old. I have a 10-year-old daughter that means the world to me. After two long-term relationships, spanning half my life, I found myself feeling lost and unsure of who I was anymore. So many years spent trying to be somebody I'm not for usually the wrong reasons, had left me seeking the truth. I've always felt a little different and out of place. This strange feeling that I'm here for a greater purpose, but no idea what that is. One thing I know for sure is that I'm not here to hurt anybody or spread negativity. Actually I believe it's the opposite. I believe I'm here to help people and spread love and kindness. Shine a little light into the world.

It hard to expand on it. But I went through the similar situation. It been six years since the marriage ended and I have had 2 other partners since then. Looking back at it and asking the questions why. My conclusion is no one is perfect but if we don't take active steps in learning how to fill our own cup we will always expect someone or something to fill that cup to fulfil us. You owe it to yourself to live each day fully. To know who you are, what your purpose is and who you aspire to be in order to be the best version of yourself. I feel we need to work on our issues to resolve them before entering relationships work on improving and fixing you mentally physically spiritually and everything will change for you in a positive way.

I was working in a soul destroying place for 3 years - the kind of job that was pretty secure, pretty supportive (I guess), but desperately dull and pointless. Hey! But it was a regular income - I used to justify it this way. I also write music and occasionally get paid for doing so - it's always been a bonus to me. But whenever I sat down to get "all business-ey" with my music, something died, the inspiration, the joy of writing. Whatever it was, it lost its magic and I became frustrated, I lacked ideas and direction. I accepted that it's purpose was to actually to "bring up my own vibes" - just create music for the love of creating I guess. And any commissions are a bonus. I then decided to get a grip of my life earlier this year, and eliminate as many things as possible that were making me unhappy. I quit my dull, soul destroying job and set up my own business as a tour guide. I didn't care about income, I just wanted happiness and fun. I absolutely love the tour guide thing. Really. It's energising, full of life and I get to show magical people around the Highlands of Scotland. It's full of aesthetic and satisfaction. I love the interaction I have with the folk I show around. The best job I think I could have. It's really about happiness. I've always believed that when you're truly happy, everything else falls into place. I see people focus on income, get paid loads but are miserable at their work. They seem to think that they'll be happy with a large income. The best thing about finding a job in which I love is that because I'm happy, things are actually falling into place for me. Not that it's important (no more important than happiness anyway) but my income is 5 times better than it was being miserable at my previous job. And my music? Well I find that being out in the nature compliments my writing. It gives me lots of inspiration and is a great balance for me when I get a few days off. I find also that I'm making more money from my music once again as a result. My point is not to brag. Honestly I focused on income for years and I was miserable for it. I guess I'm trying to say that if anyone has an idea of what they want to do with their life but are concerned about income, just remember that your happiness is more valuable than money ever will be. Everything falls into place when you're happy.

Just signed up, I’m in the middle of an Action for Happiness course and I’m loving the conversations and thoughts arising through the experience, so I typed in Happiness and low and behold there you are! And I thought I’ll have some of that! Looking forward to expanding my learning, meeting new characters and smiling more. Top Tip - every time you pass a mirror, give yourself a cheeky wink and smile ? and do it with purpose, like you are properly giving yourself the eye. Makes not a jot of difference to your life, but it’s nice to be silly when no one else can see. K

Hello! Thank you for sharing Leah! I signed up for the same reasons. I'd love to connect and talk more about this wonderful journey we are on. I am also a creative, having found and embraced my purpose for being here: making music and connecting with people. Let's get esoteric!

#metoo! I still don't know why I'm here or what my purpose is. I feel like the earth is in transition and energy is shifting. I'm sure our way will be shown when we are ready. Xx

I agree self care is so important daily, its hard sometimes I feel guilty with a never ending to do list . But I find slowing down is helping me feel so much better about myself. There is no rush to get chores done they will always be there. I find breaking up my day. Working in small chunks so helpful. Then I will relax with a good book, a puzzle , gardening, or going for a bike ride in nature, listening to uplifting music. Helps me recharge Instead of adding to your to do list, journal about all the things you've accomplished . Will make you see progress you've made and make you feel like your day has purpose and that you have achieved something no matter how low you are.

"The purpose of our lives is to be happy." ― Dalai Lama

Hi Emma, yes, I have. Some days I would wake up and not know how I got to where I am, wondering why I'm here and what the purpose of it all is. What helped for me is reading a lot of books about non-duality and the tricks the mind and ego plays on us. Yoga also helped me so much to connect with my body, my mind and my soul (I'd like to think). For years, without realising, I lived every day not knowing who I am or how to be. Especially because I thought I was supposed to be a certain way for my partner to love me, completely ignoring all the warning signals going off around me. It was hard. It's still hard, but there's a way out. I find something to be grateful for every day. I practice self-care and self-love as often as I can. I often write Morning Pages (journaling without thinking about it and just letting your feelings and thoughts flow out through the pen onto the paper). I repeat positive affirmations until I notice the shift in my negative thinking/energy. I try very hard not to beat myself up, and I listen to the most beautiful music on youtube every day which REALLY calms me and puts my mind at peace.

Deffo agree with @Purr regards to health, both mental and physical. I've had issues with anxiety and panic attacks which really got me down for a while. And now I have some problems with a bad knee and ankle which has been impacting on happiness, as I love to do lots of walking and hiking and have been limited because of my injury! Grr! Also as @Bethnicles points out from the study, relationships are also key. I love being around the people that make me happy. I'd also add purpose/meaning to that list of things that are essential for happiness and well-being. I feel better when I know I am achieving something useful