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I think it’s safe to say that acquiring material things aren’t making us any happier. In fact, stress and depression are more common now than ever before. We live in a world where consumption has become an addiction. It’s all about the getting the newest, latest or biggest, which distracts us from what really brings satisfaction and joy. I sometimes look around my apartment and think, “how did I accumulate so much crap?!”. I also often dream about being in place and when I have to leave, I struggle with packing my luggage because I just have SO. MUCH. STUFF! I remember a happiness.com article from a while ago, stating the benefits of living a simple life, and earlier today, I saw someone reading the book Simplify Your Life: 100 Ways to Slow Down and Enjoy the Things That Really Matter. Has anyone here read that book? Now, I’d like to know HOW to live a more simple life and where does one actually begin? I suppose making small manageable changes in the beginning is a good start. What are some of the ways we could all live simpler lives and focus on what really matters, such as our health and well-being, our mental health, and family and friend relationships? All and any tips on simple living and relevant books and other content welcome ?

This year I'm spending New Years Eve alone, and since my focus has shifted from mindless partying and drinking, I will instead sit down and work my way through this beautiful little exercise to enter the new year consciously and with new intentions. It will help me reflect on who I am, and who I'd like to be going forward. By Nedra Glover Tawwab, Boundaries expert, writer and therapist. 1. In what ways (big and small) have I grown? 2. What limiting beliefs do I need to release? 3. What stressed me out the most, and what can I do to reduce my stress in that area? 4. How will I nurture myself in 2020? 5. What do I need to make room for in 2020? 6. What habits do I want to create, break, or refresh? 7. What do I need to learn more about? 8. What boundaries do I need to implement to have healthier relationships? 9. What's one small thing I can do to change my life? Self-awareness is one of the most essential parts of growth. Who will join me in doing this exercise tonight? Happy New Year, and Happy New YOU. ✨

Hi Gabrielle. Happy new year! We have an article on forgiveness which you may find useful: https://www.happiness.com/en/magazine/relationships/how-to-practice-forgiveness/

I think you are giving up on things (and your happiness) way too soon Sachinthya. Firstly; how firm is your 'criteria' for a partner. Could it be too aligned with those of your ex; so that you are actually missing out on decent men that you could build happiness together with? Secondly; you have had one serious relationship and now you are giving up? Many of us try multiple long term relationships and years of dating before we find someone we can love. If you really want this - no giving up so soon girlfriend. And no giving yourself excuses not to do it either. Dating isn't meant to be all easy. But like most worthwhile things - it will come right in the end and then you can breathe a sigh of relief. Part of dating and finding a suitable partner goes hand in hand with rejection - which can make us feel more lonely than if we never tried. It also prepares us for feeling more happy when someone comes along who is a proper fit. It's temporary is what I'm suggesting. I am single myself and have to come out of the rat race every few months or so - just to settle and recharge my emotional batteries. As someone else suggests; if you don't like the digital nature of phones/dating. Then maybe an answer would be to join activities where people collect. And embrace new hobbies with dating only as a sideline.

Sorry; I saw 49 under you pic and assumed it was your age lol - classic newbie mistake. So it was your wife's idea for you to move in and she isn't there anymore? I would. encourage you to really think about what it is about being around your Mum that changes your behaviour negatively. I suspect that you are internalising some of the negativity around you and this is contributing to your shutting down/off. If you feel that you are taking on extra emotional stuff that can also impact on your other relationships making you feel more tired, frustrated, irritable etc. Your first reaction when you thought about moving in with her was a gut reaction of negativity - I trust this is based on previous experience and is worth listening to. I don't think you can do much about the silly arguments - besides say they could be a natural part of living closely. Maybe you and your son can get out of the house more before bickering starts. There is an exit strategy for everyone - but you may have to reach out to agencies that can put you in the direction of financial etc support. If you are going to accept your Mum's help; I think you are also choosing to accept any difficulties that come alongside. In which case; time outs, mindfulness practices, meditation etc may help with getting some headspace and balancing good and bad. Buddhism as a practice has plenty to say about being compassionate to those with faults in their characters (don't we all). It encourages people to give gratitude and compassion even if we are feeling negative things ourselves - a 'fake it till you make it strategy'. Also; have you ever sat your Mum down and asked her how she finds living with you? Could be a way to understand her better or correct anything which is negative.

My name is Jeremy. 40 years old. I have a 10-year-old daughter that means the world to me. After two long-term relationships, spanning half my life, I found myself feeling lost and unsure of who I was anymore. So many years spent trying to be somebody I'm not for usually the wrong reasons, had left me seeking the truth. I've always felt a little different and out of place. This strange feeling that I'm here for a greater purpose, but no idea what that is. One thing I know for sure is that I'm not here to hurt anybody or spread negativity. Actually I believe it's the opposite. I believe I'm here to help people and spread love and kindness. Shine a little light into the world.

I wonder where you are looking? If you're not finding people that you click with where you're currently looking then find somewhere else to go, maybe join clubs that interest you? If online then make your profile really authentic and then the people you attract will be more on your wavelength. Fill your life with things you enjoy and the focus on relationships will not be so strong or feel like such a void. If you are holding your ex on a pedestal then this will be hard to meet someone new because you will be comparing to him, so maybe work through your feelings of loss for the relationship you lost.

It hard to expand on it. But I went through the similar situation. It been six years since the marriage ended and I have had 2 other partners since then. Looking back at it and asking the questions why. My conclusion is no one is perfect but if we don't take active steps in learning how to fill our own cup we will always expect someone or something to fill that cup to fulfil us. You owe it to yourself to live each day fully. To know who you are, what your purpose is and who you aspire to be in order to be the best version of yourself. I feel we need to work on our issues to resolve them before entering relationships work on improving and fixing you mentally physically spiritually and everything will change for you in a positive way.

I've just read a lovely piece on the struggle of emptiness when it arises and what one can do to overcome it. The first recommendation is to acknowledge the emptiness, as by doing so, you can see it for what it is. A few questions to ask oneself when you feel empty: Do I tell myself positive things? Am I judging myself or comparing myself to others? Am I actively tending to my physical and health needs? Have I turned towards behaviours or addictions to avoid my feelings? Are my feelings being considered in my relationships, or am I minimising what I'm feeling? Am I blaming myself or feeling guilty for things beyond my control? Am I showing myself compassion as I would with a friend or family member? Am I asserting myself in my decisions and respecting my personal opinions? Other tips include finding things to be grateful for, spending time in nature, doing something you love, helping someone else, going to sleep and trying again tomorrow. I loved this article because it reminded me that it's totally ok to have down days, and sleeping on it doesn't necessarily mean giving up. For anyone battling emptiness every now and then, remember you're not alone, and it will pass. A super quote I just read: "Everything will be ok in the end. If it's not ok, it's not the end" - John Lennon. Here's the link to the full article: https://weallneedhope.com/battling-emptiness-7-tips-for-when-you-feel-empty/ And to delve a little deeper, some more great advice on the topic can be found here. Does anyone else have tips and go-to's to share on how they overcome the feeling of emptiness?

Hi Joyce. Welcome to the happiness community ? In my opinion, positive advice, support and a shoulder to cry on is PLENTY. Many people don't have that in their family relationships, and I hope and am sure your children greatly appreciate that in you.

Hi Ali, I think, that being in a depression has no benefit at all. As the eclectic Mom above said: It sucks the life out of you. What can be or is beneficial for a person, is the emotional intelligence that one can gain when gotten over a depression. Understanding and listenting to others worries and sufferings is a great tool for making our relationships more deep and meaningful.

Deffo agree with @Purr regards to health, both mental and physical. I've had issues with anxiety and panic attacks which really got me down for a while. And now I have some problems with a bad knee and ankle which has been impacting on happiness, as I love to do lots of walking and hiking and have been limited because of my injury! Grr! Also as @Bethnicles points out from the study, relationships are also key. I love being around the people that make me happy. I'd also add purpose/meaning to that list of things that are essential for happiness and well-being. I feel better when I know I am achieving something useful

"Contentment gives real happiness. Happiness is a temporary "high", whereas contentment is a longer lasting, deeper feeling of satisfaction and gratitude for spiritual blessings and relationships." Do you agree with this phrase? Please share with me your thoughts...

A new study has found that good mental health and being in a relationship make people happier than doubling their salaries. ? Depression and anxiety were the hardest issues people in the study lived with, but being in a relationship saw the biggest increase in the happiness of those living with these dis-eases. This tells me that the things that matter most for our happiness and overall wellbeing, as well as for our misery, are our social relationships and our mental health. What do you think?