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The global pandemic, political turmoil, and now the ongoing cost-of-living crisis has left many of us feeling increasingly stressed, anxious and upset. With that in mind, Dee Marques shares 11 practical tips to feel stress-free quickly – all backed by science. Stress is one of the biggest health challenges we face today. While a small amount of positive stress can be good for us, ongoing chronic stress can lead to or exacerbate many serious health problems. And with Coronavirus still testing the health and well-being of the globe, it's become increasingly difficult to remain free from stress, with many of us noticing our anxiety levels are on the rise. Indeed, in the US, more than 55 per cent of people claim to feel stressed during the day, a figure that’s well above the global average (35 per cent). Meanwhile, in the UK, nearly 75 per cent of adults say they have felt overwhelmed by stress at some point over the past year. In fact, stress isn't “just stress”, since it affects both our mental and physical health. Studies show a close link between stress and mental health conditions like depression and anxiety. Other side effects of unmanaged stress include anger, low self-esteem, loneliness and poor memory. As for its potential impact on the body, stress can cause anything from headaches to digestive disorders, insomnia, skin and hair problems, and increased chances of developing heart conditions. 11 ways to feel stress-free fast Since stress is so widespread, you may wonder if it really is possible to become free from stress. While that may seem hard to achieve, there are definitely things you can do to reduce your stress and anxiety levels that do not require a great deal of time or money. Here are 11 ideas you can try to reduce stress and start to feel calm quickly. 1. The power of houseplants One of the simpler (and more enjoyable) steps you can take is creating a stress-free environment. We can’t always do that at large scale, but there are little things you can do in you home and personal working space. Indoor plants, as humble as they may seem, have become increasingly popular recently and for good reason – they can boost enormously your ability to cope with stress. In fact, a Japanese study compared the feelings produced by transplanting a plant vs working on a computer. The result showed that while the group who worked on a computer had higher blood pressure, those who interacted with plants felt calm and soothed. Indeed, adding indoor plants to your home environment can make a world of a difference and help you to become stress-free. Plants may reduce blood pressure and stress levels shutterstock/Amilao 2. Breathing techniques Our bodies react to stress by going into overdrive. Studies confirm a link between slow controlled breathing and the nervous system: taking deep breaths reminds the brain that it’s time to calm down, and then the brain sends the same message to the body to stabilize the heart rate and release tension in the muscles. If you’re not familiar with the benefits of controlled breathing, it’s time to explore some techniques that can help you control anxiety and help you feel stress-free. Check out the final tip in our article on mindful behavior for a great breathing technique that will relax you within seconds and feel your melt away. 3. Physical activity Exercise causes a spike in endorphins, one of the happiness hormones. To achieve a stress-free state, the key is to engage in physical activity regularly. The type and frequency of exercise depends on your preference and overall health status, but as a guideline, a Finnish medical study found that moderate aerobic exercise was best for higher endorphin levels. “Adding indoor plants to your home environment can make a world of a difference and help you to become stress-free.” Some types of moderate exercise that can bring relief include cycling, brisk walking, dancing and water aerobics. The impact of COVID-19 means we can't do all of these right now, but still try and do some form of exercise in your home or garden to keep your spirits up and mental health in check. RELATED: Mindful running – 6 tips to get you started 4. Body relaxation To become stress-free fast, add a mix of mood-boosting exercise with calming relaxation techniques. Relaxation methods like tai chi, meditation, yoga, or mindfulness have been practised for centuries. Consciously relaxing your body, or even parts of it, can slow down your heart rate, lower stress hormone levels, and boost confidence in your ability to cope with problems. Some techniques you want to try include progressive muscle relaxation, massage therapy, qi gong, and ashtanga yoga. 5. Experiment with essential oils Aromatherapy has been around for thousands of years. Even in Ancient Egypt people were aware of the power of aromatic herbs and their role in well-being. The organs responsible for our sense of smell are directly connected to the parts of the brain linked to emotions, so exposure to certain scents can have a positive effect on mood and help reduce anxiety. Lavender essential oil has been widely studied for its ability to induce calm, and it seems effective in the short-term treatment of anxiety and restlessness. Other essential oils to help you become free from stress include jasmine, bergamot, holy basil, rose, frankincense, vetiver and lemon balm. Aromatherapy: sniff to reduce stress shutterstock/Madeleine Steinbach 6. Create a stress-free playlist We’re only beginning to understand the power of music and how it brings stress relief. If, as 17th century playwright William Congreve said, “music has charms to soothe a savage beast”, surely it can help us reach a stress-free state too? One study compared stress levels in surgical patients who listened to music before an operation and those who didn’t, and found that those who listened to music had lower blood pressure and were said to feel less anxious. Some sounds and rhythms can be more effective than others. 7. Do nothing Feeling overwhelmed by tasks or responsibilities is one of the most common causes of stress. Sometimes, the best response is to put everything on hold and do nothing but take care of yourself: something many of us had to do during the COVID-19 pandemic. However, if doing nothing is still not an option, consider doing less or doing things at a slower pace, or doing them mindfully. Mindfulness gives you a chance to slow down, focus, and become more aware of your reactions. It has also been connected to lower activity in the amygdala, the part of the brain that triggers fear and stress responses. 8. Visualization techniques Visualization techniques can have a calming effect when stress becomes too much to handle. Immerse yourself in a scene that makes you happy and relaxed, and recreate every sensory aspect of the scene, from the smells to the sights or the sounds. By focusing on the sensory experience as a whole, you direct your attention away from sources of stress. Once that happens, your brain will also signal your body to relax. “Exercise causes a spike in endorphins, one of the happiness hormones. To achieve a stress-free state, the key is to engage in physical activity regularly.” Researchers have found that visualization (also called guided imagery) can boost mood and improve depressive symptoms in multiple sclerosis patients, so it surely can have a beneficial effect on stress too. RELATED: Visualization meditation – how to practise it 9. Share your feelings A burden shared is a burden halved, so don’t hesitate to talk someone close to you if worry begins to take over. Sharing your worries can bring a sense of relief, and scientific evidence supports this. A 2013 study found that disclosing feelings of worry and anxiety to someone sympathetic reduced levels of cortisol, the stress hormone. Sometimes you may even prefer to talk to a stranger. Talking therapy is effective in stress relief, whether it’s in person or over the phone. Talking is a therapy to become stress-free shutterstock/Monkey Business Images 10. B vitamins for stress support Did you know that certain vitamin deficiencies can lead to increased feelings of stress? A stress-free diet should be especially rich in B-complex vitamins. Some researchers suggest that these vitamins can lower homocysteine, an amino acid that spikes in stressful situations. So, it’s a good idea to revamp your meal plan to ensure it includes good amounts of vitamin B-rich foods, such as whole grains, legumes, dark leafy vegetables, seeds and nuts. Making this a habit can help lift your mood and reduce the mental fatigue brought about by stress. RELATED: The gut-brain axis 11. Honour your true self Sometimes, stress is a result of internal conflict. There are situations where we must choose between doing what we know in our hearts to be right, and pleasing others or dishonoring our core values. We all have certain values that guide our lives, so take some time to remind yourself of which are the most important to you. One of the steps towards being stress-free is resolving any tension or discrepancies between who you are and who you want to be. This is your opportunity to do just that and feel better. The takeaway: stress-free living During these tough times, try not to let stress and rising anxiety levels get in the way of your happiness. While we all experience stressful situations, there’s no reason to be overwhelmed by them, since we have multiple tools to strengthen our inner-self and become stress-free quickly. So, the next time you feel your anxiety levels rising, give some of our suggestions a try. ● Main image: shutterstock/baranq happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member yet? Sign up for free to: ■ enjoy our happiness magazine ■ share and support in our happiness forum ■ learn with free online Academy classes Stress management | Letting go | Motivation Written by Dee Marques A social sciences graduate with a keen interest in languages, communication, and personal development strategies. Dee loves exercising, being out in nature, and discovering warm and sunny places where she can escape the winter.

Have you ever considered that a simple kiss could be more than just a sign of affection? What if I told you that locking lips with someone you care about could actually be a secret weapon for your health and well-being? Imagine if something as intimate and comforting as a kiss could not only bring you closer to your partner, but also improve your health in ways you never thought possible. Intrigued? You should be. The benefits of a kiss are immense. But how can a simple kiss offer so much, you may ask? Think back to the last time your lips met those of someone special. Did a wave of euphoria wash over you, or perhaps a profound sense of belonging? Was there a moment when the world seemed to stand still, enveloping you in peace amidst the chaos? It's not all in your head. The science behind kissing reveals a cocktail of benefits, from immunological boosts to stress relief, that many of us overlook. Why does kissing have such a powerful effect on our wellbeing? And how can such a simple gesture be a catalyst for strengthening bonds, improving health and promoting happiness? Let's embark on an exploration into the heart of kissing, armed with scientific evidence and expert opinion, to reveal the myriad ways it can enrich our lives. Are you ready to explore how a daily dose of kissing can potentially sideline your doctor? 1. The unlikely hero of oral health - How kissing works wonders Have you ever stopped in the middle of a kiss to reflect on the magic unfolding in your mouth? Beyond the embrace and the emotional whirlwind, there is an intricate science at work that is quietly championing your health. Every time our lips meet in a kiss, it's not just sparks that fly; our salivary glands spring into action, boosting saliva production. But why is this important? Think of saliva as an unsung hero, particularly important for maintaining impeccable oral health. As the intensity of a kiss increases, so does the flow of saliva, acting less like a simple biological response and more like a meticulous cleaner for your mouth. This rush effectively sweeps away food particles and bacteria lurking on your teeth and gums, like a miniature car wash for your oral cavity. Instead of soap and water, it uses saliva, a natural defence against plaque build-up and a warrior in the fight against tooth decay and gum disease. Who would have thought that a kiss could be a staunch ally in our oral hygiene arsenal and one way to strengthen your dental health? 2. How kissing fuels our inner joy - Endless euphoria Have you ever wondered why a kiss has the magical ability to turn the page on a dull day or lift a happy one to new heights? It goes beyond the mere emotional euphoria of being close to someone we love. Every time our lips meet, an invisible orchestra of chemicals plays inside us, orchestrating the blissful sensations that follow. This symphony involves a potent mix of hormones - dopamine, oxytocin and serotonin - our body's natural happiness architects, who play a key role in lifting our spirits. Think of dopamine as the spark of excitement that floods you, the addictive rush that beckons for more, anchored in the brain's reward circuitry, it gives pleasure and eagerness. Oxytocin, dubbed the 'love hormone', forges deeper connections, cementing emotional bonds and making every shared kiss a treasure trove of cherished moments. And serotonin, the mood enhancer, opens the doors to happiness, creating a pervasive sense of contentment. But the impact of these hormonal waves goes far beyond fleeting joy. They have the power to relieve stress, stave off the shadows of depression and even dull the edge of pain, acting as nature's antidote to emotional and physical ailments. So when the weight of the world seems unbearable, perhaps the remedy lies in the tender refuge of a kiss. A natural, effortless way to brighten your day and strengthen your bonds, no prescription needed. Isn't it amazing to consider the profound power of a simple kiss? 3. Kissing: The silent power of relationships Have you ever wondered why a kiss feels like two souls weaving together? Beyond its romantic allure lies a profound ability to strengthen the bonds between partners. More than just a physical interaction. Kissing is a powerful symbol of emotional connection, a silent dialogue of love and trust. But how does such a simple act have the power to strengthen relationships? Kissing is an exchange of more than affection - it's a mutual sharing of emotions and vulnerability. This act triggers the release of oxytocin, known as the 'bonding hormone', which increases feelings of attachment and makes partners feel closer and more connected. It acts as an emotional glue, promoting a sense of belonging and security. Kissing also acts as a non-verbal communication tool, expressing desires, emotions and mutual understanding. It can deepen the quality of a relationship, make it more resilient and keep the initial spark alive. So when you kiss, remember that it's not just a moment of closeness, it's a crucial act in nurturing the bond of your relationship. 4. The sweet way to heart health with a big kiss Have you ever wondered why, after a passionate kiss, your heart races as if you've been running, but you haven't moved an inch? It's not just an emotional flutter; kissing has real, measurable benefits for your heart health. But how does this intimate act double as a mini cardio session? When you kiss, your heart rate increases - a sign not just of excitement, but of your body receiving a beneficial boost. This accelerated heartbeat helps to dilate your blood vessels, increasing blood flow and lowering blood pressure. Every kiss is like a gentle workout for your heart and blood vessels, providing a subtle but effective tune-up. As well as improving circulation, the cardiovascular stimulation of kissing can also reduce the risk of heart disease, acting as a light, enjoyable workout. Kissing also acts as a natural stress reliever. Considering that chronic stress can lead to high blood pressure and heart complications, the calming effect of kissing not only improves your mood, but also supports your heart health. Could kissing be the most enjoyable activity for heart health? While it doesn't replace traditional exercise, it's a delightful addition to any heart care programme. The next time you share a kiss, you're not just sharing affection with your partner, you're also caring for your heart. So why not lean in for a kiss, knowing that it's a small act with a big impact on your heart health? 5. A natural elixir against pain - soft kisses Have you ever noticed how a kiss can erase the pain of a headache or soothe a cramp? It's not just whimsy. There's science behind kissing's pain-relieving powers. When we kiss, our bodies release endorphins, powerful natural painkillers that outperform some drugs. These endorphins not only distract from pain, they actually relieve it. In addition, kissing increases blood circulation, which improves the delivery of oxygen and nutrients to cells, aiding recovery and reducing the pain of conditions such as headaches or cramps. This increase in blood flow, triggered by the excitement of a kiss, contributes significantly to pain relief. So the next time pain strikes, remember that a kiss could be a simple, sweet and natural remedy. Who knew that the gentle expression of love could also be an effective pain reliever? 6. Kissing - A boost for trust and connection Have you ever thought about the power of a kiss to lift your spirits and enrich your relationship? Beyond the initial thrill, kissing has a profound effect on self-esteem and relationship satisfaction. But how does this intimate gesture achieve such powerful results? At its core, kissing is an affirmation of affection and acceptance, a shared moment that signifies desire and value. This mutual recognition, especially from a loved one, boosts self-esteem by reinforcing the feeling of being valued and loved. It's a powerful reminder of your valued place in someone else's life, improving your self-image and overall mood. In addition, the act of kissing fosters stronger bonds between partners, increasing relationship satisfaction. It creates a positive feedback loop; as your self-esteem improves, so does your emotional connection with your partner, leading to a more secure and fulfilling relationship. 7. Decoding physical compatibility through kisses Have you ever pondered the significance of that first kiss and its make-or-break vibe? Beyond emotional bonding, a kiss serves as a crucial gauge of physical compatibility. But how does this simple act provide insight into a potential future with someone? A kiss is not just an exchange of emotions; it's a subtle test of biological compatibility. Through the tastes and smells experienced in a kiss, we unconsciously assess our partner's immune system, looking for a complementary genetic mix that promises healthier offspring. Although it may seem scientific, this process deeply influences our romantic choices. The quality of a kiss can reflect levels of connection and attraction, influencing our feelings and potential relationship trajectory. It's as if our instincts guide us towards partners who are biologically as well as emotionally compatible with us. The next time you kiss, think of it as more than a gesture of affection. It's a complex interaction of biology, emotion and chemistry that will lead you to someone truly compatible. A kiss, in its silence, speaks volumes about the bond and potential future with your partner. 8. The quick fix for stress and sadness - more than a healthy kiss Caught in a moment of stress or sadness? A kiss could be the simplest yet most profound remedy. More than just a sign of affection, it's a powerful mood-lifter and stress-buster. How does it work? Kissing triggers a biochemical reaction that releases endorphins - your body's feel-good chemicals - similar to the rush you feel after a good laugh or a session at the gym. It also lowers cortisol, the stress hormone, bringing calm and reducing tension. So the next time life's pressures mount, remember the power of a kiss. It's a delightful way to brighten your day and ease your worries, showing how the simplest expressions of love can be incredibly transformative. 9. Kiss your way to burning calories Who knew a kiss could be a mini workout? Kissing may not replace time at the gym, but it does have calorie-burning benefits. A passionate kiss works several facial muscles, burning calories in the process. A deep kiss can activate up to 34 facial muscles, giving your metabolism a little boost and leading to calorie loss. Imagine burning 30 to 60 calories in a 30-minute make-out session - that's a guilt-free treat! This fun fact reminds us that pleasure and health can go hand in hand. Kissing adds a playful, romantic element to our wellness routines, proving that affection can also contribute to our fitness goals. So next time, remember that a kiss isn't just romantic. It's a sweet part of staying active. Who says fitness can't be fun? 10. A key to health and relationship longevity Dr Jen Carl, a respected health expert, offers a fresh perspective on the health benefits of kissing, highlighting its role beyond romance. According to Dr Carl, kissing is a powerful wellness tool that boosts the immune system, reduces stress and improves mental health, rivalling many traditional health practices. Importantly, Dr Carl points out that kissing strengthens relationships, with the release of oxytocin during a kiss strengthening emotional bonds and contributing to the longevity of relationships. This link between emotional intimacy and health underlines the value of incorporating simple acts of affection into our lives. Kiss yourself healthy When you consider that kissing touches our lives - from burning calories and relieving pain to boosting our mental health and strengthening our relationships - it becomes clear that this simple act is anything but trivial. Experts like Dr Jen Carl remind us that beyond the immediate joy and connection it brings, kissing has deep, multifaceted benefits for our well-being and the longevity of our relationships. She underscores the profound impact that affection and human connection have on our health, and invites us to embrace these moments not only for their romantic value, but for the significant role they play in our overall well-being. As we reflect on the insights and revelations about the power of kissing, let's carry forward the appreciation for the small, intimate gestures that enrich our lives in a big way. You don ́t have someone to Kiss? In Basel you can find the best kiss partners.

Most of us have probably asked ourselves what's the point of life'? Indeed, sometimes our time on Earth can seem futile. However, Dee Marques argues that finding meaning in your existence is key and tells you the three vital questions you should ask yourself to help find it. There comes a point in our lives where, no matter how successful we think we are, we’re bound to question why we’re here, what we're doing and where we’re going. Sometimes, posing these questions can help us evaluate our goals and lifestyle and improve them for better physical and mental health. In other cases – perhaps when we're feeling low or vulnerable – wondering what the point of life is can amplify feelings of depression, anxiety and emptiness. As humans, we’re unique in the animal kingdom, among many other reasons because of our quest for finding fulfilment and happiness in life. We aim to do more than eat, sleep, reproduce, and stay safe. This quest for meaning has characterised humans since the beginning of times and it’s a central question in every culture. And according to scientists, the search for meaning seems to be coded into our nature: our brains are larger and with this comes the ability to appreciate things beyond meeting our basic needs. • JOIN US! Need support? Sign-up to happiness.com and join a community that cares • And we can do more than appreciate the positive and joyful aspects of life. Trying to find meaning in negative experiences is also an ability that’s unique to humans, and that’s precisely what leads us to ask 'what's the point of life'. So how can we go about finding an answer? Let’s look at some practical ideas. What's the point of life? What if the purpose of life was finding a way to forget about the question 'what's the point of life?'! Maybe there’s no single thing that brings meaning per se, but the journey itself may be what helps us find purpose. And when we talk about the journey, we mean every aspect of it, from savouring the pleasant experiences to learning from mistakes. What's the point of life? Both meaning and purpose But for the journey to be meaningful, it must be the result of your own choices. Some people try to find meaning in wealth and fame, but this doesn’t have to be your story. As a living being, you’re in a unique position to decide what your purpose should be. We didn’t choose to be born, but we can choose how to live our lives and how to enjoy it. “What if the purpose of life was finding a way to forget about the question 'what's the point of life?'” To do that, it helps focusing on being consciously grounded in the present. Practising mindfulness creates a greater awareness of what it means to be alive. It helps your mind get more in touch with your emotions, reactions, and with your five senses. This type of clarity can open your eyes to things or experiences that help you to live your life with purpose. And mindfulness is not the only thing that can bring us clarity: there are some questions you can ask yourself to inspire your search for purpose. The 3 questions to help you find meaning The quest for meaning in life is so vast that the very thought of getting started can make you feel overwhelmed. Discovering what the point of life is is a lifelong journey and the steps and stages won’t be the same for everyone. However, there are some questions that you can put you on the right track to begin the journey of discovery. 1. What would you like to be remembered for? As humans, we tend to focus on the present and in the future. If you examine your ambitions, you may find that they’re limited to what you want to achieve this year, next year, on in the next decade. But have you thought about what you’d want to be remembered for? The answer to this question is usually related to career or spiritual goals rather than material ones, and thinking about it can help bring into focus the true essence of your being. 2. If you had super-powers, which problem would you solve first? There’s no shortage of serious problems in the world, and while it’s not always in our hands to solve them, thinking about which problem you’d give priority can hint at where your main concerns are. Once you know that, you can start looking for ways of doing your part. For example, if you find that you’d want to end world hunger, you may want to spend some time volunteering at a soup kitchen, or creating a community food garden. 3. What’s the one activity that makes you lose track of time? We all know that time drags on when we’re doing something we dislike. But the opposite is also true: there are some activities that make time fly because they get our full attention and bring us a sense of fulfilment. Losing track of time when doing something is known as finding your flow, and it's a clear sign that the activity taps into the things that make us come alive. So, spending more time in those activities can help you enjoy a more meaningful life. These questions are just the starting point: we’ve written an article about other ways to guide your search for meaning. What's the point of life? Being enough There’s no doubt that knowing what your purpose in life is can bring you closer to happiness. But if you’ve been trying to find out what your role in life is and have found no answer, don’t torture yourself. People’s experiences are different and not everyone will find the right answer at the same time. Gratitude: having enough can be enough shutterstock/WAYHOME studio What’s more, rushing into finding an answer will only put you under pressure and cause stress. Instead, try to see it from a different perspective: if you haven’t found an answer yet, simply “being” should be enough for now. Here are four suggestions on how to make that work: 1. Find abundance in having enough The powers of gratitude are proven by science. Make a list of things you already have in your life that make you feel blessed and grateful. Through mindfulness practice, you can find abundance in these things, and you may find that having enough is… enough! 2. Get comfortable with discomfort Life can feel like an uphill battle sometimes, at it's at those times when we might wonder what's the point of life or of going through hard times. However, discomfort in life is unavoidable and trying to find meaning in those experiences often leads to frustration. So, try to accept life for what it is and know that the hard times won't last for ever. “Discovering what the point of life is is a lifelong journey and the steps and stages won’t be the same for everyone.” 3. Let your intuition guide you Finding the meaning of life requires some analytical thinking, but sometimes logical reasoning doesn’t have all the answers. The key is to balance rational thoughts with intuition, which sometimes will contradict all logical arguments. Listen and trust that inner voice because it usually knows what’s good and right for you! 4. Forget what others think or are doing Some people seem to have their life’s purpose figured out, but comparing yourself to them isn’t helpful. The point of life is to live it in your own terms and at your own pace, and that should be the main focus. For the same reason, don’t let other people’s opinions affect you when it comes to what you find meaningful or how you go about finding your ambition, role or purpose. • JOIN US! Struggling with life? Sign-up to happiness.com and share your story • Conclusions So, what is the point of life? If there’s one thing that holds true for most of us, it's that the point of life is to live and experience things to the fullest, whatever that “fullest” means for you right now. Don’t rush your quest for meaning. Instead, make a point of finding joy in what you already have and try your best to feel grounded in the present. At some point, you’ll find the answer you’re looking for, and in the meantime, enjoy the journey! • Main image: shutterstock/Song_about_summer Written by Dee Marques A social sciences graduate with a keen interest in languages, communication, and personal development strategies. Dee loves exercising, being out in nature, and discovering warm and sunny places where she can escape the winter.

In today's noisy and unsettling world, in can be difficult to find inner peace and tranquility. Dee Marques explores the three key techniques that can help: mindfulness, shadow work and cultivating equanimity. It’s true that human history has always been marked by unsavoury events, but perhaps you share the feeling that these days, conflict, hatred, and violence suddenly seem to be all around us. Feeling you don’t really know what’s happening to the world is deeply unsettling and can threaten your inner peace and happiness. Yet, there are things you can do to counteract these emotions. Here are some ideas on how you can promote inner peace within yourself – and with others – regardless of how uncertain the world around us may be. Finding inner peace When dealing with hatred and violence, finding ways to promote inner peace requires mindful action. Here are the three key techniques you can use to try and find that inner calm and quiet. 1. Mindfulness Our first suggestion is to practise mindfulness. Not just because of its ability to transform your inner self, but because it can change your perception of the world, too. Indeed, scientific studies have shown that regular mindfulness practice appears to shrink the amygdala (the part of the brain that controls feelings of fear), while at the same time activating the pre-frontal cortex, which is associated with decision-making and awareness. All this means that mindfulness can help us regulate our emotions instead of simply reacting to triggers. It also helps us make more balanced judgements about what’s going on around us, as well as inside us. Discover some great mindfulness tips, such as mindful eating and drinking, gratitude walks and creating a start-of-the-day ritual. Finding inner peace through gratitude walks 2. Shadow work When it comes to finding inner peace and calm, our second suggestion is to engage in shadow work. This transformational practice is based on the idea that our feelings and perceptions about ourselves dominate the way we feel and act towards others. The shadow is the “negative you” or “your dark side”. With shadow work, instead of pushing it to the back of your mind or repressing it (as most of us feel tempted to do), you should explore it. This helps you to learn more about your own prejudices and misconceptions. The basic outline of shadow work looks like this: Acknowledge the negative emotions triggered by some people, news or events. Connect with your shadow and establish a conversation with it. What is it trying to achieve? Is its overall intention positive or negative? In most cases, your shadow holds on to negative emotions to protect you from harm. Can you find other ways of achieving the same without getting caught in a negative circle or without blaming others? Last but not least, remember that peace is not a goal that can be reached through certain mediums, but rather peace is the medium itself. In other words, use peace to bring inner peace by showing kindness and consideration towards your body and mind. For example, loving-kindness meditation has been proven to reduce self-criticism, promote peace with ourselves and others, and generate positive feelings towards strangers. .embed-container { position: relative; padding-bottom: 56.25%; height: 0; overflow: hidden; max-width: 100%; } .embed-container iframe, .embed-container object, .embed-container embed { position: absolute; top: 0; left: 0; width: 100%; height: 100%; } Loving kindness meditation for inner peace YouTube/LovingKindnessMeditation 3. Cultivating equanimity Cultivating equanimity can also help you to find inner peace and also peace with the outside world. Equanimity is one of the Four Sublime States in the Buddhist tradition, and the word derives from Sanskrit expression that means “to see without interference”. Equanimity is also defined as even-mindedness, a balanced reaction to both positive and negative events or thoughts, and the ability to achieve a state of mind that cannot be affected by bias and prejudice, but that's driven by compassion instead. “Finding ways to promote peace requires mindful action. Basically, you’ll need to disarm the inner world first in order to disarm the outer world.” Cultivating equanimity involves re-wiring your brain through conscious practise. Yoga (especially gratitude yoga) provides the ideal conditions to work on this. Find your equanimity mantra (something that reminds you of the need to stay unbiased), start your yoga session, and take note of any negative reactions triggered by thoughts or people you dislike. Keep referring to your equanimity mantra while acknowledging that you are responsible for your own happiness and peace of mind. Finding peace in the outside world Of course, we should all do our best not only to promote inner peace in our minds, but also in the outside world. To do that, you don’t need to make grand gestures. As Buddhist author and peace activist Thich Nhat Hanh said: “Learn the art of making one person happy, and you will learn to express your love for the whole of humanity and all beings.” So, here are 10 easy-to-put-into-action gestures of peace and kindness: Send a heart-felt handwritten card to a friend or relative Compliment a colleague and express how much you appreciate them Offer a small gift (e.g. fruit, biscuits) to the person who delivers your post Donate to a charity shop Volunteering is important. Try it at a shelter or soup kitchen Offer your place in the queue to the person behind you (or try another random act of kindness) Track down an old teacher or lecturer, and send them a note of appreciation Bake some treats and take them to work to share with colleagues Let another driver into your lane Strike up a conversation with a homeless person Meditation can help you to cultivate inner peace shuttertsock/Jack Frog When it comes to finding inner peace and calm in troubled times, it’s important to resist isolation, even if this seems to go against our most basic instincts. For example, you could get involved in community-building initiatives, as this can help establish meaningful conversations with those who hold different views. You can also join non-violence organizations, or learn more about how prejudice and stereotypes affect us by signing up to prejudice reduction workshops or seminars in your local area or online. Conclusions: finding inner peace Finding kindness and peace within yourself and in the world won’t happen overnight, but mindfulness practise, shadow work, cultivating equanimity, and resisting isolation are within the path to hope and joy. To cope with the troubled times we're currently living in, you’ll need to be persistent and willing to challenge your inner self. ● Main image: shutterstock/marvent happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practice, share Are you a happiness.com member yet? Sign up for free now to: ■ enjoy our happiness magazine with practical life tips ■ share and support others in our happiness forum ■ learn with free online classes in our happiness Academy Gratitude | | Meditation | Volunteering Written by Dee Marques A social sciences graduate with a keen interest in languages, communication, and personal development strategies. Dee loves exercising, being out in nature, and discovering warm and sunny places where she can escape the winter.

We all get down on ourselves sometimes, but if you're stuck in a rut and thinking “I hate my life”, then it's time to take action. Psychologist Stanislava Puač Jovanović shares 10 practical ideas to help put your life in perspective and turn things around so you can start loving it again... “I hate my life!” Does this statement (or, rather, exclamation bellowed in agony) resonate with you now or in the past? Then you are not alone. Life can be joyous, exhilarating and breathtaking. However, it is also unpredictable. Challenges arise, we make wrong decisions, difficulties get hurled our way. A part of life is to dislike some of it. You might have married the wrong person, and now you loathe your time together. Maybe you were hit by an economic crisis and cannot make ends meet. You could be chronically overworked, not having the time to do anything else. Sometimes it seems only logical to hate your life. I lived in that state for many years. And I do not mean a teenage “I hate my life!” exclamation when you embarrass yourself in front of the entire class. I'm talking about the darkest loathing of every waking moment. I know how your soul grows black when you feel inescapably hopeless and helpless. Why did I share that with you? Because I want you to know that what you will read is not empty talk. I have travelled the path, and I did so very recently. You, too, can swim back to the surface. How? Read on for some ideas on how to fight the antipathy you nurture towards your own life — and fall back in love with it. Stop hating, start reclaiming Hating your life is not a pretty state to be in. Wrong choices and regret tend to put you off course. I remember when I noticed my life suddenly starting to lose all its colours. I felt lost. I was paralysed by the revulsion when I catalogued all my failures that made my life unenjoyable, to say the least. If you have had enough of loathing, start reclaiming your life. It may be a long road to travel. Still, you are bound to become sager afterwards — not to mention happier. 1. Take time to reflect The very first step you need to take is to understand why you hate your life. It may be obvious, like having a job that drains your energy and has no higher purpose whatsoever. In other instances, the source of your hatred may not be so obvious. It could be a group of aspects of your life, like an unsupportive family, lack of time for hobbies, overly expensive apartment, wrong profession, and so on. If you hate your life, it's time to take steps to change it Take some time to reflect on the topic. Write down your thoughts if you need to. What it is exactly that you want out of your life? It would be best if you determined exactly where the loathing comes from. Because unless you know why you hate your life, it will be challenging to come up with how to change it. 2. Determine what's in your power to change When you're done with the soul-searching from the first step, you should analyse the situation. What is it that you can control and change? What is out of your hands? For example, if you're in an abusive relationship, there's little point in trying to make the abuser change. However, you can transform your perspective on things. You can gradually start refusing to think about your life and yourself as they dictate. Their insults do not have to be the building blocks of your identity. RELATED: Changing perspective and gaining happiness The Serenity Prayer, regardless of your religion, speaks about a pearl of universal and timeless wisdom: Grant to us the serenity of mind to accept that which cannot be changed; courage to change that which can be changed, and wisdom to know the one from the other 3. Remove unhelpful automatic thoughts Whatever your situation may be, chances are, the previous step led you to realise your thoughts are always in your hands. Indeed, it's the one thing we can always control. We all have many automatic thoughts. Unfortunately, they are often unhelpful. Such maladaptive thinking patterns cause numerous disturbances and difficulties, as a cross-cultural study found. A straightforward example: if you keep thinking “I hate my life” then you are gearing your mind towards negativity. “Come up with alternative statements and start thinking them instead of the negative ones. For example, replace 'I hate my life' with 'It's in my power to create the life I want.” Work on removing such maladaptive thoughts. Challenge them, search for counterarguments. Come up with alternative statements, and start thinking them instead of the negative ones. For example, replace “I hate my life” with “It is in my power to create the life I want”. Remember: you are not your thoughts. A systematic review of nearly 70 scientific papers confirmed the power of self-talk. Positive self-talk can improve our performance, help with depression or anxiety symptoms, and increase our confidence. 4. Forgive and self-forgive If you're in a situation that makes you hate your life, maybe you need to work on forgiveness. An extensive review of studies on forgiveness found that if we find it in ourselves to replace the unforgiving emotions with empathy and compassion, our bodies and minds heal. And what about self-forgiveness? When you forgive yourself, you open the doors to growing as a person, a study revealed. According to Stanford University’s summary of recent findings in the field, self-forgiveness leads to: Wisdom Increased ability to focus, success, and higher productivity Better emotional health More quality relationships A sense of happiness and gratitude Whether you’re feeling guilty for hurting another person, being in the wrong place at the wrong time, or for failing to stick to healthy habits, let go of self-hate. Letting go of loathing will help you release your energy for a fresh start and a new, happier life. 5. Practise gratitude When you hate your life, you probably have a bias towards seeing the negatives. It may be a strong mental habit, making you blind to the opportunities that are still there for you. However, if you're fed up with the hatred of your life, start practising gratitude. Focus on all of the good things in your life. Indeed, even in the darkest moments, there is something to be grateful for. Practise gratitude and enjoy the simple things in life shutterstock/Serhii Yurkiv It may be your memories and the wonderful moments you've had in the past. It could be your inner strength and perseverance. Look at nature and cherish its beauty. Take a moment to watch the morning and be thankful for seeing it. Savour. Then move gradually towards recognising other positives in your life — friends, family, your home, your job... find the good in everything you can. In that way, you train your mind to stop focusing on the loathsome aspects of your life. Scientific research has confirmed the benefits of gratitude on life satisfaction and happiness. Suddenly, you will start seeing the opportunities to turn things around. 6. Avoid comparisons Comparing yourself to others can make you vulnerable to anxiety, low self-esteem and depression. We're naturally inclined to compare ourselves to others. Social media make it very difficult not to. However, what people showcase online is carefully corrected and selected to display only the best features. Trying to keep up with those fake standards is bound to make you hate your life. Even when you know images and posts are edited, they can still make you feel inadequate. “However, if you're fed up with the hatred of your life, start practising gratitude. Even in the darkest moments, there is something to be grateful for.” So, do not compare yourself. Direct your energy towards your authentic needs and wishes instead. Ask yourself — what would I want if I was not trying to keep up? What would I do if I did not care about praise, money, accomplishments, recognition? 7. Explore your passions Do you remember the last time you felt on top of the world? You were likely living in line with your principles and passions at that time. Now that you are not, you probably feel lost and “I hate my life” has become your mantra. Therefore, venture on to explore and (re)discover your interests. Ask yourself: “What is it that I used to love doing and believed in?” “What would I want to do if I did not have to care about money or anything else?” Search for the activities that give you something called flow, a phrase coined by psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. Flow is a state in which you get lost in an activity. You stop noticing time passing, and you're absorbed in what you're doing. Csikszentmihalyi’s research concluded that the more ‘flow’ you have in your life, the more resilience, well-being, and fulfilment you will enjoy. 8. Get support (and input) from your friends and family Hating your life puts you in a dark and, often, lonely place. You may be living under circumstances that isolate you. The heaviness of the feeling might be too much to hide or to share with others. Embrace family when you're feeling low in life shutterstock/AlessandroBiascioli Yet, being alone is a stressor on its own. It can make it too easy to ruminate about what you loathe about your life. Try to “prescribe” yourself socialising with people. Enjoy a casual coffee with friends or a heart-to-heart conversation about what worries you. Studies revealed that social support could help you step out of your head and gain a fresh perspective on things. 9. Look after yourself When you're in a state of loathing your life, it often becomes difficult to take good care of yourself. However, the mind-body connection goes two ways. When you're sleep-deprived, sick, and physically weak, you become psychologically vulnerable, too. RELATED: Feeling blue or clinically depressed? The 4 things you should look out for So, start looking after yourself. Sleep, exercise, get enough fresh air, eat healthy food. Scientific research has proven that physical activity helps lower the levels of stress hormones in your body. It also increases your ability to focus and use your intellectual skills better. As a result, you will gain clarity and better control over your emotions. Same goes for other acts of self-care. Give yourself plenty of self-love, even when you do not feel like it. Your future self will thank you. 10. Make a plan of action After all of the steps above, you're probably ready to make an action plan. Identify what makes you unhappy. Commit to making small steps to improve things. Each day, ask yourself: “What is it that I can do to move closer to my goal today?” The “I hate my life” monster might raise its ugly head a few more times. However, stop sabotaging yourself. Do not allow it to stay in your head for too long. Remember — our time on this planet is limited. You do not want to spend whatever time you have left hating your life — you want to change it while you can. Takeaway: I hate my life Yes, you only get to live once. So, does it make any sense to hate your life? Is it not wiser to try and change it around? It may take some time, but if you use the rock bottom you're at right now to push yourself back to the surface, you will be able to say: “I survived”. You will start to love living again and enjoy every moment of it. • Main image: shutterstock/Srdjan Randjelovic Please note that the “I hate my life” sentiment might be a symptom of clinical depression. If you experience any of the signs of this emotional disorder, make sure to reach out to your local mental health services. In the US, you can also contact the National Suicide Prevention Hotline for free and confidential support. Use Lifeline Chat or call 1-800-273-TALK (8255). In the UK, call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: [email protected] for a reply within 24 hours. You can also text “SHOUT” to 85258 to contact the Shout Crisis Text Line, or text “YM” if you're under 19. happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member? Sign up for free to enjoy: ■ our happiness magazine with practical life tips ■ sharing and supporting in our happiness forum ■ learning with free online Academy classes Authenticity | Empathy | Communication skills Written by Stanislava Puač Jovanović Stanislava Puač Jovanović has a master’s degree in psychology and works as a freelance writer and researcher in this area. Her primary focus is on questions relating to mental health, stress-management, self-development and well-being.

When we are stuck making a decision, inner turmoil or conflict often arises, leading to both mental and physical health issues. Psychologist Stanislava Puač Jovanović explains the reasons for inner turmoil and the five steps you should take to move past it. For most of my adolescence and adulthood, I felt conflicted about where to live. My mother is from one country, and my father was from another. When I was 14, they divorced. Suddenly, my family was scattered across Europe. So, my inner turmoil started. Where – or rather with whom – to live was a burning question during the period of my parent’s divorce. The same issue arose when I had to pick a high school, then college — and after graduation when I was supposed to get a job. In fact, battling inner turmoil didn’t truly leave my side until recently. And I do not exclude the option of it becoming current again at some point in the future! Inner turmoil is everyone’s known (and rather unpleasant) companion. It does not matter if you are picking a shirt or a spouse. Internal conflicts are usually inseparable from the decision-making process. Therefore, we have little choice but to accept their presence. We can, however, understand inner turmoils and learn how to resolve the chaos they tend to cause. In this article, I'll explain: What inner turmoil is and what adversities may come with it What causes inner turmoil How to move past it First, let us get to know inner turmoil and why it might be the wrong place for you to stay for too long. What is inner turmoil and why is it bad? Inner turmoil is not, strictly speaking, a phrase that psychologists would use. However, it describes the experience very well. The term that is used in academic psychology is inner or internal conflict. Internal conflict is one of the prime notions of psychoanalysis. Sigmund Freud described conflicts as a consequence of the coexistence of two or more incompatible elements in a person’s psyche. These elements can be your needs, wants, beliefs, expectations, actions — conscious or unconscious. Simply put, two forces are clashing inside of you. Inner turmoil can cause mental and physical health problems It could be that there are two (or more) options that seem alluring. This is the “easiest” of the conflicts. For example, you could be courted by two people who both attract you. However, by virtue of the situation, when you pick one, you lose the other. Adding to the ordeal is a common effect — the option you dismissed will start looking more appealing. Double-avoidance conflict is a more difficult one because you must choose between two unfavourable options. For example, you might need to decide if you want to be unemployed and broke or accept a job you hate. Approach-avoidance conflict is something you experience when one option has qualities that both attract and repel you. Moving to a city that you do not like but that offers a better professional outlook is a good example. Or dating someone who you are physically attracted to but whose personality you are unsure of. The problem with this sort of inner turmoil is that the more you approach the option, the more the anxiety grows. On the other hand, the more you move away from it, the more you start to desire it. Why can inner turmoil be bad for you? As I said before – inner turmoils are not something we can avoid. They are a part of our lives. However, staying in one for too long can be bad for you. Why? When you are not at peace with yourself and do not understand your preferences, you will probably have a hard time getting along with others. Inner conflicts and ambivalent desires transfer to your close relationships. “Moving past inner turmoil means making a move. Whether it is a psychological change or an enacted decision, something has to happen.” Inner turmoil in which you are not clear about your role and identity, as a theoretical paper demonstrated, can make you underperform in negotiations in business. Any other sort of negotiations, it may be added, can be affected by your inability to decide which position and role you are taking. When in internal conflict, you might find yourself unable to move forward. Research confirmed that when you are ambivalent, regardless of how much power in a situation you may have, you will probably remain inert and avoid action. Furthermore, inner turmoil may lead to a range of emotional and physical disturbances. Irritable bowel syndrome, for example, has been found to be associated with internal conflicts. In particular, you may be at risk of the syndrome if you feel uneasy about being emotionally open and expressing your feelings. What causes inner turmoil? Remember my example from the beginning of the article? As I was born and spent most of my life in my father’s homeland, I felt more at home there. On the other hand, it was wiser to move to my mother’s homeland as it has incomparably better living standards. Not to mention wanting to be with my little sister, who was four at that point. Understandably so, a long list of problems and issues (logistical and emotional) intertwined with the whole situation. In short, it was a hot mess. And, my inner turmoil was equally as intense. What caused it was too many elements of the situation that did not align with each other. Conflicting needs, beliefs, actions and expectations cause internal turmoil. According to the classic psychoanalytic theory, our Ego has to serve three masters. It has to find a way to reconcile the external world’s demands, instinctual needs and desires (Id), and the ethical and moral principles we acquired growing up (Super-Ego). Needless to say, there is rarely harmony between these masters. Inner turmoil: our ego has to serve three masters shutterstock/Pixel4Images So, inner turmoil arises. You simultaneously want and do not want something. Your longings might clash with your principles. You know that one option is rational, but your heart desires another. Many elements interweave, and you end up in a state of internal chaos. It is an entirely natural position, a part of being a human. You could, for example, be in an utterly unhappy marriage. However, you were raised to consider a divorce something outright wrong. Your need to feel psychologically well and your ethical beliefs oppose each other. You might long to do something creative in life and be an artist, but you feel pressured to meet your family’s hopes and find an office job. Your true desires and wish to please your loved ones’ expectations clash. Or, you have needs that do not match social norms in your culture, like sexual orientation. The authentic You is not in line with society’s standards, and an inner turmoil is born. “Once you have committed to leaving the state of turmoil, help yourself decide what you want and what you will do.” You might find yourself falling for your friend or a coworker. You yearn to make a move, but it poses a risk of losing them and destroying the existing relationship. Your feelings conflict with your desire to maintain the safety of what you have now. You may be torn between your roles of an individual, child, parent, friend, professional, spouse, and the desires and expectations that come with those roles. How to move past inner turmoil If you're wondering how I resolved the conflict of where to live — I had to make a choice. I was compelled to do so when external circumstances called for it (the divorce, the schooling). But, the time came when I did not have to make a choice — I could merely succumb to inertia and avoid making any commitment. And I did for a while. Nonetheless, I could not keep dodging a decision forever. Moving past inner turmoil means making a move. Whether it is a psychological change or an enacted decision, something has to happen. Otherwise, you remain stuck within the whirlpool of conflicting needs and perspectives. Here's what you can do to start dealing with internal conflict: 1. Understand the turmoil Clinical practice shows that you need to explore the symptoms of the conflict — how is it manifested and in what situations do you notice it? What emotions and beliefs are keeping it alive? What rigidities in your mind are preventing you from leaving the conflict behind you? How do you usually try to cope with it? Knowing your most profound traits and desires (even the dark ones) is a must of authentic living and a prerequisite for resolving any inner conflict. 2. Make a decision As I've explained, one of the adversities of inner turmoils is a tendency for inertness they may throw you into. Give yourself enough time to contemplate — but do not procrastinate. Bring yourself to make a move. Fear of change, dread of making a wrong choice, feeling lost in life, or undefined anxiety are perfectly understandable reactions. However, putting a decision off is a sort of self-sabotage. So, promise yourself you are going to move ahead — and do so. Making a choice is essential to escape inner conflict shutterstock/ESB Professional 3. Facilitate the choice Once you have committed to leaving the state of turmoil, help yourself decide what you want and what you will do. Talk to friends, a psychotherapist or a coach, make pros and cons lists — whatever works. 4. Stop feeding the conflict When you have deciphered what has caused your inner turmoil and what you want to do about it, stop adding to the anxiety it causes. For example, if you want to get a divorce, stop evoking the thoughts of how “wrong” it is to do so that your parents or culture imposed on you. 5. Believe in yourself We often feel hindered by self-doubt. You might want to apply for your dream job but are reluctant because you doubt you are good enough. Give yourself plenty of self-love and practise self-compassion. You can do it. Even if you make a wrong choice, you are capable of mending the damage. Takeaway: inner turmoil can also be seen as a hint Internal conflicts are anything but a pleasant experience. A quote from Søren Kierkegaard’s ‘Either/Or’ illustrates the anguishing nature of human lives: “Hang yourself, you will regret it; do not hang yourself, and you will also regret that; hang yourself or do not hang yourself, you will regret both; whether you hang yourself or do not hang yourself, you will regret both.” Now, Kierkegaard was a philosopher, hence the hanging. Yet, if you translate the idea to any other choice, the message is clear. Whatever we chose and do, we will probably end regretting it and up believing that the other option was better. However, it does not mean that we are doomed to despair about missed opportunities and errors we made. Instead, approach your inner turmoil as a hint. Something is going on inside of you, and you need to figure it out. Embrace internal conflicts as a call from your unconscious mind to explore your soul. Use it as a beacon. Let it guide you towards knowing yourself — and making decisions that follow your authentic nature and needs. • Main image: shutterstock/ArtFamily happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member? Sign up for free to enjoy: ■ our happiness magazine with practical life tips ■ sharing and supporting others in our happiness forum ■ developing with free online classes in our Academy Authenticity | Self-help | Coaching | Kindness Written by Stanislava Puač Jovanović Stanislava Puač Jovanović has a master’s degree in psychology and works as a freelance writer and researcher in this area. Her primary focus is on questions relating to mental health, stress-management, self-development and well-being.

The term lightworker is increasingly used, but what exactly is a lightworker and what is their role in society? Sonia Vadlamani looks at some of their common personality traits and shows you how to identify if you could be a lightworker, too. If you regularly read online magazines centered on well-being, spirituality or expanding your consciousness, you’ve probably come across the term ‘lightworker’. And, no matter how many references are made to it, you still may not be entirely sure what a lightworker actually is and how to identify one. And while there’s no science-backed evidence or research studies that can say what a lightworker is, more and more people from our community seek to know more about these driven souls. So, what is a lightworker? Technically, the term lightworker was first coined by author and teacher Michael Mirdad relatively recently, in the early 80s. Later, in 1997, Doreen Virtue released the book The Lightworkers Way. The simplest way to describe lightworkers would be as beings who feel an enormous pull towards helping others. Also referred to as crystal babies, indigos, Earth angels and star seeds, these spiritual beings volunteer to act as a beacon for the Earth, and commit to serving humanity. Lightworkers feel the urge to help humanity They often feel greater kindness and compassion towards others right from their childhood – chances are that they’ve rescued several animals and other living beings in distress from a young age. Lightworkers tend to be sensitive, and hence they feel sadness and anguish for the misery that dwells in the world around them. This is why they tend to choose professions wherein their empathetic nature can be used to assist those in need, like nursing, therapy, rehabilitation, healing, care-giving, veterinary services, research and teaching etc. Lightworkers are intuitive and driven by their internal guidance. They can often ably perceive the emotions and needs of other living beings, which enables them to harness and direct their healing powers towards those who need help. They also believe in carrying out coordinated efforts to dispel or chase away negative consciousness using their positive energies and healing powers. Not all lightworkers realize the nature of their spiritual calling right away. While some star seeds may realize that their purpose on Earth is to elevate mankind’s collective consciousness, several lightworkers can only sense a drive to serve and compassion in their own hearts, and that they feel good when supporting others through difficult times. “What is a lightworker? They feel an enormous pull towards helping others. These spiritual beings volunteer to act as a beacon for the Earth, and commit to serving humanity.” It often takes some intuitive guidance – as well as going through the process of self-realization and discovery – to realize that their mission on Earth is to make a positive impact in whichever way they can. Given that they're faced with the same limitations and obstacles as other mortal beings, this manner of spiritual awakening and tuning into their inner light can sometimes take years for a lightworker. How do I know I’m a lightworker? If you’ve read about lightworkers and wondered if you could be one, you can only find the answer through introspection. Lightworkers are driven by a deep-felt desire to serve those in need, and are blessed with intuitive powers and inner guidance that enables them to sense energy shifts and emotions like pain and sorrow in others around them. • JOIN US! Sign-up free and share your light with the happiness.com community • They also feel connected with all living beings and Earth, and at the same time feel isolated and distant from others as they tend to look into the world from outside. If you identify with these core traits, and the desire to serve mankind and the world resonates deep within your heart, then perhaps you were intended to be a lightworker. The different types of lightworkers Lightworkers can possess strengths and core abilities in one or more areas of service. Tuning into your could help you understand what your unique gifts are, and which kind of lightworker you might be. The following types can help one identify where their inner calling lies: 1. Spiritual guides and healers Lightworkers who are driven towards serving living beings and the Earth through healing using mental, physical, emotional or spiritual approaches fall under this category. They are often highly perceptive of feelings and emotions in others, and characteristically can alleviate pain and hurt within a few minutes of time spent with people or animals. Their sensitivity towards pain could often render them fatigued or overwhelmed, and it takes some conscious moderation to keep this tendency in check. Nurses, caregivers, psychologists, doctors, etc, fall under this category. 2. Psychics and seers Using their elevated awareness and intuitive powers, lightworkers can develop psychic sights to be able to see beyond the material form and illusion. They can accordingly predict future events and concentrate their efforts to stimulate positive outcomes, with the end goal to promote world peace and harmony. Could you be a lightworker? shutterstock/sun ok 3. Gridworking and gatekeeping A grid here refers to a unit that connects all awakened hearts and sacred sites on Earth using lay lines. Gridworkers and gatekeepers are advanced lightworkers who specialize in clearing work, their main role being opening of inter-dimensional grid lines to let light and love flow through. • SHINE YOUR LIGHT Do you want to help others? Our community needs you • Gatekeepers are often government employees, diplomats or even mediators and yoga instructors etc, wherein they encourage peace, kindness, positive energy and fairness to all living beings. 4. Manifestors Also known as divine blueprint creators, manifestors are a type of lightworker that are expert at channeling their intrinsic energy to attract what they want. Their mission to make the world a better and peaceful place enables them to manifest awakened collective consciousness for humanity. 5. Guides and messengers Some lightworkers possess a unique flair for spreading important messages to the world. They concentrate their efforts in areas where their inner light and magnetic presence can make greatest impact on others by communicating messages of love, peace, spiritual awakening and enlightenment. Motivational speakers, bloggers, artists, teachers, writers, life-coaches, etc, who strive to serve humanity through their words, actions or work can be categorized as messengers. “Lightworkers are intuitive and driven by their internal guidance. They can often ably perceive the emotions and needs of other living beings.” 6. Transmuters Also known as neutralizers, these lightworkers specialize in dispelling negativity, thus restoring neutrality and balance back into the world. Neutralizers may work in favor of the entire collective consciousness, or even help people release or heal negative karma from their ancestral lines. 7. Dreamers and travelers These lightworkers can never accept the status-quo, and always strive for new solutions and adventure. They learn to push limitations and manifest light during dreamwork, creating boundless capacity for change along multiple dimensions of the Earth. Explorers, inventors, pioneers can be classified as dreamers and travelers. .embed-container { position: relative; padding-bottom: 56.25%; height: 0; overflow: hidden; max-width: 100%; } .embed-container iframe, .embed-container object, .embed-container embed { position: absolute; top: 0; left: 0; width: 100%; height: 100%; } 8. Adventurers and ascension guides Adventurers are always on the lookout for newer possibilities, driven by belief that better things await if one just looks beyond the obvious. Along with ascension guides, they work towards creating higher inter-dimensional possibilities and broadening mankind’s vision for future. Lightworkers: the takeaway In summary, lightworkers are awakened beings who bear the highest interests of all living beings and Earth in their minds. They hold a distinctive core of kindness within themselves and vibrate at a higher energy level that enables them to be positive and support others through their struggles. Not all lightworkers realize their purpose on Earth from the beginning. However, when they do so upon self-actualization, they need not dramatically transform their life. In fact, it’s possible for them to lead a regular life and career, while simultaneously shining their light, helping and supporting others and creating positive experiences for those around. To know if you were destined to be a lightworker, you could begin by tuning in to the self – search within your heart and determine whether channeling your light out in the world is one of your life missions. • Main image: shutterstock/StunningArt Do you identify as a lightworker? Our safe and supportive community at happiness.com could be a great place for you to shine your light and help others in need. Sign-up and join the discussion on lightwork. happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member? Join free now and: ■ enjoy our happiness magazine ■ share and support in our happiness forum ■ develop with free online Academy classes Volunteering | Life purpose | Meditation Written by Sonia Vadlamani Fitness and healthy food blogger, food photographer and stylist, travel-addict. Sonia loves to write and has resolved to dedicate her life to revealing how easy and important it is to be happier, stronger and fitter each day. Follow her pursuits at FitFoodieDiary or on Instagram.

Is the intuitive thought process reliable, and can we quantify it? Sonia Vadlamani discusses forms of intuitive thinking and why implementing these can help us make better decisions. Perceiving an important lesson or a mysterious insight without any logical thought or reasoning being utilized –also known as intuitive thinking – has been prevalent in us humans since time immemorial. “There can be as much value in the blink of an eye as in months of rational analysis,” claims author Malcolm Gladwell. As a matter of fact, we often apply intuition alongside rationality, logical reasoning, and facts, while we are assessing a situation, even if we are unaware of it. What exactly is intuition? Intuition refers to responses or feelings that do not arise from deliberate reasoning or conscious thinking. The subconscious brain stores lessons and findings from our past experiences and attempts to recognize and retrieve these thought patterns in similar situations. These learnings are often lightning-fast and not logical at the outset but seem to occur from a deep-seated knowledge. “Intuition involves a sense of knowing without knowing how one knows,” states Dr Seymour Epstein, Professor Emeritus in Psychology at University of Massachusetts. Also known as a ‘gut feeling’ or ‘hunch’, intuition can play a crucial role in day-to-day choices as well as complex decisions, so that aunt with an uncanny foresight for predicting a tragedy or the friend who sometimes can spot incoming trouble when she meets your love interest, may in fact be relying on their intuition to make these decisions. RELATED: 7 ways to tap into your intuition Relying on intuition has saved me from physical harm and mental distress many a time. A few years ago I was returning with a group of friends from a road trip spanning several thousand miles. We debated whether to keep driving through the night to cover more distance, or to halt at an inn, so we’d be rested and refreshed when we started driving again in the morning. I usually rush through the return journey as I start missing home, but curiously my gut told me to avoid it this once. “Don’t drive tonight” was the specific answer I was hearing from within, and though surprised, I heeded it nevertheless. Intuitive thinking is our inner 'gut feeling' I didn’t quite understand the need to take a break in this manner, but somehow managed to convince my friends to do the same. In the morning, when we started driving afresh after a good night’s rest and a nourishing breakfast, we witnessed a massive accident on the bridge which was the only way out of the town. A sleep-deprived driver had tragically driven a bus off the bridge into the river the previous night, causing a traffic mayhem which had begun to clear only in the morning. If we had driven through the night, we’d be exactly there at the time of the accident. While we felt extremely sorry for those who’d been in the mishap, I was incredibly glad I listened to my inner voice. Intuitive thinking and cultures Interestingly, one’s tendency to trust their intuitive thought and the context it’s used for is warped in cultural and geographical influences. According to Gerd Gigerenzer, director at Max Planck Institute for Human Development, intuitive thinking is considered somewhat inferior to rational thinking and logical deduction in the North American and South Korean subcontinents. In contrast, a study by Emma E. Buchtel et al revealed that East Asians tend to favor intuitive reasoning more as compared to those from other regions in the world. In Japan, inner intuitive thought is encouraged as the primary reasoning method from a tender age and is honed with the guidance of masters. • JOIN US! Sign-up and connect with a caring, curious and spiritual community • Also, some religions value intuitive reasoning more than others. Religions like Hinduism and Buddhism inherently encourage intuitive reasoning, thus instilling personal qualities which help build authentic self, like awareness, mindfulness, staying in the present moment and meditation practices, etc. is prioritized. Researchers claim that we begin to develop and utilize intuition as early as from the age of six, when we are still in the second stage of development, also known as the stage of concrete operations. According to the Truine Brain theory, intuition may arise from near the pineal gland situated in the prefrontal cortex area in the brain, which regulates our emotions or affective system, in addition to granting us lessons or insights with inputs from morality and intuition. “Some religions value intuitive reasoning more than others. Hinduism and Buddhism inherently encourage intuitive reasoning, thus instilling personal qualities helping to build your authentic self.” Interestingly, while intuitive thought doesn’t really originate in the gut, the presence of a wide range of neurotransmitter microbes in the gut make it possible for us to register our emotional experiences in the form of gastrointestinal distress. This gut-brain connection enables us to often feel emotions like anger, fear and excitement, etc, in the stomach area, which is why we sometimes call intuitive thought as our “gut feeling”. The four types of intuitive thinking Researchers have theorized four kinds of intuitive thinking, each distinct and unique yet easily identifiable in most situations: 1. Mental intuitive thinking Mental intuitive thought suggests one’s ability to find the solution for a problem, without the need for deliberation or detailed analysis. This intuitive skill is commonly seen or ideal for professions which require quick decisions to be made, like firefighters, negotiation specialists, etc. In fact, the US Office of Naval Research devised an extensive study to investigate the scope of “spidey-sense” or mental intuitive thinking to enable naval officers to make quick and efficient decisions in high-pressure and chaotic circumstances. Likewise, seasoned stockbrokers and financial wizards value their mental intuitive abilities for recognizing favorable market patterns and making winning trading decisions, a skill they mostly attribute to years of experience and discipline. 2. Emotional intuitive thinking Emotional intuition refers to one’s ability to immediately sense someone’s emotional state and personality traits. Michelle Despres, Intuitive Medium therapist and the author of Intuitively You: Evolve Your Life and Mend the World, describes this feeling as “clairsentience” or the “Intuitive Act of Clear Sensing”. A keener emotional intuitive quotient could mean higher empathy levels towards others, which means that in addition to sensing one’s energy vibrations and understanding how they’re feeling, one can also view a situation from their perspective. Intuition relies more on the heart than the head shutterstock/BRO.vector 3. Psychic intuitive thinking Psychic intuitive thinking involves overcoming a problem during a crisis or choosing the best path forward in a difficult situation without putting any deliberate mental effort into it. Psychic intuitive thought can be useful for preventing negative influences, or in determining your social dynamics. 4. Spiritual intuitive thinking Spiritual intuition concerns one’s own self-awareness and experience rather than fact-based reasoning. This kind of intuition relates to one’s connection with the higher dimension and elevated awareness, and is closely related to the principles of Buddhism, which renders it an almost supernatural characteristic. “While intuitive input can be recognized with ease, it is difficult to describe and quantify it. However, the role of intuition in decision-making cannot be denied.” Research states that encouraging intuitive thought and relying on it can lighten our overall cognitive load and reduce the response time, allowing us to make decisions swiftly and more accurately. While intuition facilitates survival by offering quick responses in a situation, it can rely heavily on “cultural capital” or learning inputs specific to our cultural, political, moral, and social landscape. Therefore, it is imperative to counter intuitive thought with rational inputs to avoid bias or inaccuracy in our decision-making process. With sufficient practice over time and by putting your trust in intuitive thought process, it is possible to tap into your intuition to improve your decision-making prowess as well as to boost creativity. Is intuitive thinking measurable? Intuition played an important role in cognition for the greatest philosophers like Plato and Aristotle. Plato believed that intuition, be it supernatural or rational, entails the immediate perception of ideas. Albert Einstein, one of the greatest physicists known to the world, has been quoted extensively as stating, “The intuitive mind is a sacred gift, and the rational mind is a faithful servant.” Einstein maintained that his groundbreaking theory of relativity was a result of his intuitive thinking, even as it faced critical objection from the scientific community then. Despite extensive acceptance of the existence of intuition and its effect on decision-making, most researchers have largely been unable to quantify it. However, a recent study by Joel Pearson et al revealed that the impact of emotional intuition over one’s choices could be measured and quantified. Pearson concludes that intuitive thought or “nonconscious emotional information” can improve the quality of decision making, in addition to improving the speed of decision-making and accurate results. Takeaway: intuitive thinking Indeed, intuition is a complex phenomenon as it is embedded in knowledge and lessons drawn from past experience. While intuitive input can be recognized with ease, it is difficult to describe and quantify it accurately. However, the role of intuition in decision-making cannot be denied. When applied carefully in conjunction with logical reasoning, intuition can offer an extensive competitive edge for individuals, as well as organizations. • Main image: shutterstock/Max4e Photo happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member? Sign up for free now to enjoy: ■ our happiness magazine with practical life tips ■ share and support others in our happiness forum ■ Develop with free online classes in our happiness Academy Dream Interpretation | Positive Psychology | Breathwork Written by Sonia Vadlamani Fitness and healthy food blogger, food photographer and stylist, travel-addict and future self journaler. Sonia loves to write and has resolved to dedicate her life to revealing how easy and important it is to be happier, stronger and fitter each day. Follow her daily pursuits at FitFoodieDiary or on Instagram.

Many of us have been touched by suicide and the loss of a loved one, family member or friend. Ahead of World Suicide Prevention Day (September 10), Calvin Holbrook has put together these eight powerful suicide prevention quotes to offer hope to anyone in need. It’s estimated that around 15 per cent of the adult population will experience depression at one point or another throughout life. And, accordingly to the World Health Organization, that means there are currently over 300 million people in the world currently living with depression. Whatever the cause, for some of these people, the emotional pain will become too much and they will consider suicide as an option of escape. In fact, around 800,000 people go through with suicide every year, and for each of those, there are around 25 times more suicide attempts. There are many factors alongside and including depression and mental illness that influence a person’s decision to go through with suicide: chronic ill health, guilt, trauma, substance abuse or loss, for example. The tragic thing is that many of those who consider suicide don’t really want to die; they just don’t know how to deal with the pain they’re experiencing. • JOIN US! In need of support? Sign-up free and join a community that cares • If you’ve ever been suicidal or know someone that has, you’ll know that without help, escaping that feeling of wanting to end it all is difficult. If you’re having difficulty opening up to others about your problems, sometimes searching for inspirational words online can offer some psychological comfort and help to get you through the day. We've put together these suicide prevention quotes to give anyone who is considering ending their life a chance to stop, reflect and reevaluate their situation. Inspirational quotes can’t take the pain away, but they may allow someone the chance to shift their perspective just enough to give them a little bit of hope and get through another day. Please feel free to share these powerful messages of hope. Suicide prevention quotes: 8 powerful sayings 1. “Soak up the views. Take in the bad weather and the good weather. You are not the storm.” Matt Haig Author Matt Haig – who lives with depression and has written widely on it – cleverly compares the ever-changing weather to our mental health. Haig himself came close to suicide aged 24 while living in Ibiza, so this suicide prevention quote is particularly poignant. What Haig is saying is that although depression comes and goes, it is not who we are and should not define us. In his best-selling book, Reasons to Stay Alive, he writes: “Understand, for instance, that having a sad thought, even having a continual succession of sad thoughts, is not the same as being a sad person.” His inspirational quote suggests that we should be mindful of our depressive thoughts and recognize that they can – and will – pass. 2. Suicide doesn’t end the chances of life getting worse, it eliminates the possibility of it ever getting any better. – Unknown Those who are deeply depressed and considering suicide usually have difficulty realizing that their life can get better. The aforementioned author Matt Haig is a great example: he was about to kill himself, but now has a successful career and a loving family. If you choose suicide, then you're eliminating future hope and the possibility of finding happiness and enjoyment. When the mind is so dark, it can be hard to see any possibility for future happiness, but it can – and often does – get better. Whether it’s through taking medication, counselling, exercise, eating well, getting into a routine, or setting goals, these steps will help you on your path. Know that it is possible to recover from feelings of depression, pain, and suicidal thoughts. 3. “Never, never, never give up.” Winston Churchill Some people with depression may have been fighting against the illness and/or suicidal tendencies for many months or years. Many of these people don’t actually want to stop living, but they cannot see a way through their despair. Indeed, the act of suicide is often associated with giving up on life. • CONNECT WITH OTHERS Sign-up to happiness.com to openly discuss and prevent suicide • This quote from the British Prime Minister – known for his strong resilience – is a signal to keep fighting. If you have depression and/or suicidal thoughts, you may be in so much pain that you don’t know how you’re going to survive, but if you can just push through each day, it gives hope that things can get better in the future. One day a time, or even one hour at a time. By never giving up you’re quietly building an inner strength and resilience that will fortify you. 4. “If you’re looking for a sign not to kill yourself, this is it.” – Unknown If you’re thinking about suicide and looking for a sign to stay alive, consider this quote your sign. Whether you realize it or not, you have the opportunity to make a positive difference in this world. Somebody out there can benefit from your unique talents and gifts. Sometimes all you may need to keep going is a simple sign letting you know that someone cares and wants you to keep living. This quote is your sign. 5. “The person who completes suicide, dies once. Those left behind die a thousand deaths, trying to relive those terrible moments and understand… why?” – Clark Sometimes people who commit suicide are not fully aware – or are in such a dark place – that they don’t consider that taking their own life will create a huge amount of pain for their loved-ones left behind. Imagine how you would feel if a person you care deeply about took their own life. It's difficult to recover from the death of a loved one, but it’s usually harder if the individual committed suicide. The act of suicide leaves people behind with unanswered questions and feelings of confusion and shame, as well as the guilt around being able to prevent the suicide. This suicide prevention quote is realistic because although a suicide may end an individual’s internal pain, the friends and family who loved the person will continue to suffer as a result of their loss. In fact, on average, every suicide leaves an estimated six or more "suicide survivors" — those who've lost someone they care about deeply and are left to struggle with their grief. Furthermore, people who've recently lost someone through suicide are themselves at an increased risk of thinking about, planning, or attempting suicide, further exacerbating the ripple effect of pain and suffering. 6. “If you want to show me that you really love me, don’t say that you would die for me, instead stay alive for me.” – Unknown This suicide prevention quote shows deep sentiment from a friend, family member or a partner in a close relationship. People who are feeling suicidal can often feel like they are a burden to their loved ones, which is not the case. This quote serves as a personal reminder from your loved ones that they would much prefer you to stay in their lives than to leave. If you really want to sacrifice your life, do it by living and contributing to make someone’s else’s life better – rather than eliminating your existence. “Inspirational quotes around suicide prevention can’t take the pain away, but they may allow you to shift your perspective just enough to give yourself a little bit of hope and to get through another day.” 7. “Place your hand over your heart, can you feel it? That is called purpose. You’re alive for a reason so don’t ever give up.” – Unknown Sometimes suicidal people want to die simply because they believe they have no reason to continue living. It may sound simple, but the fact that you’re alive and your heart is still beating and pumping blood around your body can be reason enough to keep living. Many depressed people are struggling because they're unhappy with their life and work and cannot find a specific life purpose. But, in reality, you don’t need a purpose or reason for being alive. However, if you are alive, you still have the opportunity to do whatever you want in life. Although you may not have awakened to a specific life mission yet, while your heart is still beating you have time to explore what your life purpose could be and find happiness. 8. “When you feel like giving up, just remember the reason why you held on for so long.” – Unknown This is a powerful suicide prevention quote that challenges a person considering ending their life to stop and reconsider the reasons why they’ve continued to stay strong and fight up until now. Most people have powerful reasons – such as their children, family and loved ones – for fighting through their pain and anguish. This quote helps you to think about the parts of your life that hold significant meaning for you and that force you to push through the day and keep going – even when you don’t feel like it. So, whether you want to keep fighting to provide for your family, to be there for your partner or to find your purpose in the the world and make a difference, chances are you do have a reason to keep living. • Main image: shutterstock/Jannarong If you're in a dark place and considering suicide, please reach out to someone you know or through one of these global helplines. You can also discuss suicide, depression, anxiety and other challenges over in our forum on suicidal thoughts. happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member? Join free now and: ■ enjoy our happiness magazine ■ share and support in our happiness forum ■ develop with free online Academy classes Anxiety | Loneliness | Abuse | Male loneliness Written by Calvin Holbrook Calvin edits the happiness magazine, makes gay artwork and loves swimming, yoga, dancing to house/techno, and all things vintage! Find out more.