How to deal with energy thieves

[Li****]

You know those people who you can physically feel steal all the positive energy in a room as soon as they enter? 

I have a friend who is always so negative and I really feel how she drains me when we've spent too much time together. I love her, and don't want to stop being friends with her, but I would love to hear your advice on how to deal with it. I hate the feeling when someone (not always her of course!) puts a wet blanket on my happy, positive mood just by being negative, complaining, whining etc. 

How do you deal with energy thieves? 

 

[Bj****]

Uff, i do have that same friend and i couldn´t give you an appropriate advice. Usually i try to convince him to change his view on things and to search for the positive aspects and have a laugh. But just latestly i really got tired of it, because he brings to me so much negative energy and egoism and it makes me feel like a trashcan. In times like this it could take days until i respond calls or messages to him. This feels bad, as he is really a close friend of mine. I think there is no perfect advice. If you want to stay friends keep fighting and try to have some laughs with her. I definitely won’t give up that good friend of mine, but i take my time off, when it gets too much

[Guest User]

I think it happens to most of us. Have you tried speaking to her about your feelings? Sometimes that can help and create an even stronger friendship bond. Ultimately, t is an opportunity to work on oneself, defining boundaries, practising authentic and transparent communication...but often I also feel too overwhelmed to go that way. Good luck!

[En****]

On 5/15/2019 at 9:05 AM, Lizzie said:

How do you deal with energy thieves? 

Have you talked to her about that? I mean, you could address this issue in a diplomatic way.

[huma]

I guess I agree with you all about talking to her. Also, maybe thinking again about why she's so negative, which things she has a point and which things she might be exaggerating would be a good approach. Sometimes people have some kind of "chain effect" and start to see every event negative. So if you can show her that you understand her feelings and show support about being upset or negative about some things she might be more open to think again and accept the things she exaggerates. 

[Yvonne]

I can recommend this video here.

[wa****]

My Master once said when someone is destructive, the more we should be constructive.

However I do realized that, very often, we are not able to do any rational thinking to sort ourselves out in these situations. It was like it's better not to react nor respond, that otherwise would suck out everything from us like a whirlpool.

On the positive side, I do find certain Buddhist mantra does helps to rejuvenate my energy - like in the recent cases of eclipse and Jupiter alignment, where it's the celestial objects instead of people.