Advice on how to help someone with anxiety

[Li****]

If someone close to me suffers from anxiety attacks and OCD, how can I best be there for them? What should I do/say and what should I avoid (other than the obvious)? When an anxiety attack comes along, what do I do at that moment? I want to be supportive and give them space if they need, but making sure they know I'm there if they need anything. Also, I definitely don't want to make anything worse by doing or saying something wrong! 

I understand that this is highly individual, but if anyone has any general advice, I'd really appreciate it. 

[Calvin77]

Hey Lizzie! That's really nice that you're thinking about your friends with anxiety. As someone that's had plenty of panic attacks in front of friends in the past, I know for them it can be just as scary for them as for me, especially as the symptoms are so physical and are often confused with having a heart attack!

I think the main thing you can do if they are panicking is to sit with them and really help them to focus on their deep breathing (esp if they have never had a panic attack before and not sure what to do). Breathing techniques can help you calm down and get back to normal pretty soon. 

A hug or just a bit of touch may help as well and getting them some water too. Don't be surprised though if a friend runs off during an attack...  the anxiety might make them just need to be alone for a bit - that has happened to me in the past also! 

[Li****]

Thank you for that advice @Calvin77, that's really helpful :)

[Fo****]

Hi Lizzie, something to remind them of is that 'this will pass'. Panic attacks can be so consuming that it's tricky to get that perspective when in the midst of one. Wilhelmena.

[xe****]

I suffer from vehophobia and fear of death as well as generalized anxiety disorder. 

Some things which do not help

• Being told to calm down 
• Being told I am not being rational even if I am not being rational 
• Suggesting I am over reacting 
• Trying to apply logic or reason when I am in a full blown panic
• Condescension
• Being humiliated for what is something beyond my control
• Becoming over focussed on the object of my fear
• Having people shouting or applying stress to me
• Telling me to just buck up or act more like a man

Things that help

• Information which I can find or have control over like myself choosing to read a book about the subject that scares me
• Investigating statistics and risks so that I can be more realistic 
• Cognitive behavioral techniques 
• A music I love
• Spending time with my dog
• Talking about unrelated pleasant things I enjoy
• Breathing techniques Or relaxation 
• Crafts
• Art
• In some cases confronting the fear by pushing myself forward. This doesn't work if it isn't self motivated.

[xe****]

People in the moment of a panic attack need reassurance and empathy not advice.

[EH****]

i would say that it should start with talking about it with person directly when they are in safe environment and calm. just let them know that you would like to know in advance that you want to find out what they think in which ways they would benefit most from your help when they have panic attacks. [be careful as initial question can be perceived as negative thus advance notice for them to think and probably should be carried over several talks and reviews]. basically they need to decide what they can use as anchor that would help them. various methods can be used as it depends on types, causes and triggers of anxiety and conditions on mental and physical health and one's ability to recognise own thinking style and patterns. external help then would mean for person having panic attack recognise they need to change their thought from ones fuelling panic to ones reducing it. It's tricky with OCD because loop of repetitive fueling thoughts can be very short and tight and hard to manage without medication in more serious cases. 

from perspective of Reality Transurfing, Hermetic Principles, (also NLP) helper should go "with" person they are helping rather than "against" (as @xenspirit put on his list above). Once both on same rhythm helper can lead towards calming down (like turning a tanker around - it must be done slowly). If helper is skillful in managing energies like Reiki then focus should be on beneficial outcome but not on ways to get there.

[Vb****]

Giving some suggestion with solace is useful in the condition . It reduces the grievance and applies an oinment on the wounds of sorrow.
I would like to say to quit anxiety and ponder over the reason of it. Though an anxiety is a form of thinking because it attracts the mind to bad consequence of the deeds, yet thinking is a possitive way to pay attention to the matter.
The More think over the reasons , the more the mind gets peaceful.

[er****]

I used to be a patient of anxiety and mental sickness. Some times ago someone suggest to do meditation and now I am improving. I took online mindfulness training.

[Ni****]

Hey guys. Sorry for reviving such an old thread, but I need your help. My sister has become really anxious since she got her new job last month. I thought she would be even happier when she got it, but it's turned out she's become more stressed out. What could I do to help her?

[se****]

If a person wants to get rid of it, he will look for ways, then you can offer them, what is better and what is not it is d
 When a person goes to his dream all sorts of problems happen, but still he goes and he may think about giving up or not.
And if a person does not want to, he will spit it out no matter how much effort he puts into it.
Wait for his call for help, not yours, but his.

[jo****]

If you want to help someone with anxiety, here are some tips:

Listen: Listen to the person without judgment and try to understand their perspective. Allow them to express their fears and concerns.

Be supportive: Let the person know that you are there for them and that you care about their well-being. Encourage them to seek help and let them know that they are not alone.

Offer reassurance: Let the person know that their anxiety is normal and that they are not "crazy" or "weak." Help them understand that anxiety is a common experience and that it can be managed with the right treatment.

Encourage self-care: Encourage the person to take care of themselves by getting enough sleep, eating well, exercising, and practicing relaxation techniques.

Help them seek professional help: If the person's anxiety is interfering with their daily life, encourage them to seek professional help from a therapist or mental health professional. Offer to help them find a therapist or accompany them to their appointments.

Avoid enabling: While it's important to be supportive, avoid enabling the person's anxiety by doing things for them that they can do themselves. Encourage them to take responsibility for their own well-being and to seek help when needed.

Be patient: Recovery from anxiety can take time, so be patient and supportive. Celebrate their progress, no matter how small, and encourage them to keep moving forward.

Remember that every person's experience with anxiety is different, so it's important to be open, supportive, and understanding. By providing support and encouraging the person to seek help, you can help them manage their anxiety and improve their overall well-being.

[mo****]

f someone close to me suffers from anxiety attacks and OCD, how can I best be there for them? What should I do/say 

[zy****]

vor 1 Stunde, schrieb mornigstar:

f someone close to me suffers from anxiety attacks and OCD, how can I best be there for them? What should I do/say 

That's difficult. When I tried to lower someone's anxiety by telling the person, the problems are smaller than they think they are, I was blamed for not taking the person seriously.
It turned out, the person just wanted me to listen and didn't want advice and it was hard for me to accept that, because I like the person a lot.

 

So you can listen to them, maybe hug them, help them thinking about the worst that can happen and realizing it's survivable.

Maybe advice them to visit a doctor, but that's a hard step for many people.

[Ja****]

Supporting someone with anxiety requires understanding, empathy, and patience. Here are some steps you can take to provide effective assistance:

 

Educate Yourself: Learn about anxiety disorders, their symptoms, and common triggers. Understanding what your friend or loved one is experiencing can help you provide more informed and compassionate support.

 

Listen Actively: Encourage open communication. Let the person share their feelings and thoughts without judgment. Sometimes, just having someone to talk to can be incredibly helpful.

 

Validate Their Feelings: Acknowledge their anxiety as real and valid. Avoid downplaying or dismissing their emotions. Let them know you are there to support them.

 

Be Patient: Anxiety can be overwhelming, and recovery takes time. Be patient with their progress and setbacks.

 

Offer Practical Help: Assist with tasks that might be difficult for them, such as running errands or attending social events. This can help alleviate some of the stress and pressure they might feel.

 

Encourage Professional Help: Suggest seeking therapy or counseling. A mental health professional can provide appropriate strategies and tools to manage anxiety effectively.

 

Respect Their Boundaries: While your support is crucial, it's important to respect their need for space and time alone when necessary.

 

Practice Relaxation Techniques Together: Encourage relaxation techniques like deep breathing, mindfulness, meditation, or yoga. You can even do these activities together to make it more enjoyable.

 

Engage in Positive Activities: Encourage participation in activities they enjoy and that promote well-being. Engaging in hobbies and interests can help distract from anxious thoughts.

 

Avoid Enabling: While it's important to be supportive, avoid helping them avoid situations that trigger anxiety. Encouraging gradual exposure to these situations can promote long-term coping skills.

 

Be Mindful of Language: Use language that is positive and supportive. Avoid telling them to "calm down" or implying that they should just "get over it."

Stay Connected: Keep in touch regularly, even if it's just to check in. Knowing that someone cares can make a significant difference.

 

Model Healthy Coping: Demonstrate healthy coping strategies in your own life. Your behavior can serve as a positive example.

 

Avoid Alcohol and Drugs: Encourage them to avoid using alcohol or drugs to cope with anxiety, as these can exacerbate the problem.

 

Emergency Plan: If their anxiety becomes overwhelming or they're in crisis, know the signs of a severe anxiety attack and have a plan for seeking immediate professional help.

 

Remember that you are there to support and encourage, but you are not a substitute for professional help. If their anxiety is severely impacting their life, encourage them to seek assistance from a mental health professional. Your role is to be a caring and understanding friend or loved one during their journey towards managing anxiety.