When it comes to attractiveness, it seems that good looks isn't always the most important factor for women when choosing a partner. In fact, a new study reveals that altruism and being kind is much more relevant...

 

Perceived wisdom states that women are attracted to the stereotypical 'bad boy'. But is this always the case? Recent studies suggest otherwise. Conclusions reveal that individuals who have an altruistic nature are actually more successful at finding sexual partners.


The fact is that many people are drawn to partners who show a generous spirit. After all, if they're willing to help others, then they're likely to be there for us as well. Although this study suggests that altruism calculated for personal gain rather than purely motivated from a desire to help. That won't make it any less likely to succeed unless it's clear to potential partners that the other person is acting out of personal interests.


Altruism and desirability factor

One of the studies showed that the 'bad boy' appeal still exists, but only for a short-term fling. Men who exhibited altruism were seen as more attractive for longer-term relationships. This makes sense on an evolutionary basis. In the sense that females are more likely to show interest to males willing to take care of others.

 

“The fact is that many people are drawn to partners who show a generous spirit. After all, if they're willing to help others, then they're likely to be there for us as well.”


The study also concluded that a combination of good looks and altruism was even more desirable to females, but individually, altruism was more successful than merely being handsome.

Altruism Is Sexy And Leads To More Sex
Give to get: altruism is attractive © Colourbox.com 

 

The caring touch

A man seeking a partner for a long-term relationship, therefore, can improve his chances of success by demonstrating a willingness to help others – even if he isn't particularly handsome. As a result, he becomes more attractive to women who are seeking the same kind of committed relationship.


Men who are simply looking for short-term partners can rely on their looks for success. Those not seen as 'equally handsome' will need to show more attractive behavioural traits.

 

Short-term sex vs long-haul relationship

From the male viewpoint, altruism also makes evolutionary sense. The more altruism he shows, the more sex he is likely to have, either on a casual basis or in a committed relationship. Since on a biological basis the male does not need to stay around once he has fathered a child, the degree of commitment does not matter.

 

“A man seeking a partner for a long-term relationship, therefore, can improve his chances of success by demonstrating a willingness to help others – even if he isn't particularly handsome.”


Therefore, it only matters to the female that he is willing to stay around and care for the child. This means she is looking for signs of a generous attitude when seeking a long-term relationship. However, when she only wants a short-term fling, she places more emphasis on her partner's appearance than a willingness to care for others.

 

Personality over looks

If a man is motivated for purely sexual reasons, he can improve his chances of success by merely feigning he is an altruist. However, if he genuinely wants to find a long-term partner, he can equally boost his chances by looking for ways in which he can display kindness and help others.

altruism-dating-relationships.jpg
Kindness: helping and giving to others is an attractive trait


It's possible for men to compensate for the lack of conventional good looks. By demonstrating that they have a generous spirit and willingness to help others is a good start. Looks on their own are not as appealing to women, especially those who prefer a man who is more likely to stay around and help with the offspring.

 

Attitude and altruism

This also suggests that, far from being an advantage, good looks may actually be a disadvantage for men seeking a long-term relationship. Many women may assume that he's only really suitable for a short sexual relationship. As a result, handsome men will seem more appealing if they demonstrate altruistic behaviours. He needs to prove that he's capable of helping others and willing to do so. So, for the man who is looking for a life partner, looks are irrelevant – it's his attitude that is far more important. 

Main image: Colourbox.com 

 

Written by Guest Author

bert.jpgWe're happy to publish articles by guest authors that will broaden the perspective and bring new insights. If you're interested in publishing an article here on happiness.com, please contact us.


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