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Could you be stuck in the happiness trap? Trying to pursue joy at all times? If so, it's time to stop. From practising gratitude to reaffirming your values, these five science-backed tips from Ed Gould will help you to become satisfied with how your life already is. Accepting that you feel happy enough, as opposed to constantly pursuing an idea of what happiness might be, is the route many now choose to discover greater well-being. Indeed, this is the key idea behind escaping the so-called 'happiness trap'. Remember that old REM hit, Shiny Happy People? In it, the lyrics encouraged you to put “it in your heart” where “tomorrow” and “gold and silver shine”. OK, let's not set too much store by a pop song, but it illustrates something important about modern culture: happiness seems to be shiny, attractive and – like gold and silver – material. Now, a jangly pop anthem may not be the best route to understanding what happiness is, but it does suggest the way many people still think about it. However, the pursuit of happiness can often lead us in the wrong direction. This is what today's psychologists refer to as the happiness trap. Let's have a look at what it is exactly, how you can identify the extent to which you might have fallen into it and – perhaps most importantly of all – the five main ways you can escape the happiness trap. The misguided pursuit of happiness According to Greek philosopher Aristotle, happiness involves activity and exhibiting virtue, but the word he chose to describe it was 'eudaimonia'. Often translated as 'happiness', this term is probably better described as 'human flourishing'. We seem quite removed from that sentiment when you consider how contemporary mass culture depicts happiness. Think of all the happy messages the mainstream media bombards us with to begin with. Indeed, ask yourself how many times a day that you might hear that you can be happy – will be happy, even – if only you choose these clothes, that form of transportation or those beauty products. Don't shop 'til your drop: escape the consumerism happiness trap There again, the pursuit of happiness might be marketed as being concurrent with the pursuit of other goals. For example, you may have heard you'll be happy if you pursue your youth – with an anti-wrinkle cream, of course. Or that you'll be happy if you pursue greater wealth by choosing one investment product over another. However, eudaimonia has little to do with any of that. Over the ages, spiritual leaders such as the Dalai Lama have taught us to abandon the relationship between happiness and material wealth. Bear in mind that it's not so much that increased material wealth won't bring you some sort of happiness or temporary life improvement, rather than the detriment it can cause to your perception of happiness. “Escape the happiness trap by setting aside time to recall moments of gratitude. Keep an eye on what really contributes to your happiness.” And although the current generation of Westerners are, by and large, richer than ever before, the variation of how people perceive their level of happiness is still high, to say the least. The happiness trap: what is it exactly? Feeling unhappy or sad is perfectly natural and we all go through ups and downs with our mental health from time to time. However, a general malaise in your sense of happiness may reveal that you are, indeed, stuck in the happiness trap. Furthermore, if you think your personal happiness ties in with the images you might see on TV or in lifestyle magazines, then that's another sure sign. Equally, if you're constantly comparing the level of happiness you feel with that which you perceive in your friends, family, neighbours and colleagues – known as 'keeping up with the Joneses' – then this may also indicate your entrapment of a false perception of happiness. Escaping the happiness trap: 5 strategies Identifying and accepting the state of being happy enough is the key to escaping the happiness trap. If you feel happy enough, then you won't feel the need to carry on pursuing the false idols of materialism. However, deciding to feel happy enough may be easier said than done given our materialistic culture. Indeed, a 2003 psychological study by Schooler, Airey and Loewenstein suggested that pursuing happiness as a goal was doomed to failure anyway. RELATED: Money can't buy happiness (except when you spend it like this) Thankfully, Professor Sonja Lyubomirsky and others offer some useful cognitive and behavioural tips that offer you the best chance of avoiding that empty sensation of not feeling happy enough. So, here are five key techniques you can employ to help you escape the happiness trap. 1. Positive mentality strategies Writing can have a beneficial effect on the way we think about a range of circumstances, including the way we feel about happiness. However, it's not the only positive mental strategy that you can use in a self-regulatory manner. Positive thinking about oneself can come in other reflective forms. Take a look back through old photos of heart-warming and cheerful life events. Or you might prefer to talk about your happiest and unhappiest moments in life with a loved one. RELATED: Future self journaling Another possibility is to have a discussion about your life goals for the future with your partner or a trusted friend. By focusing positivity in this way, you naturally engage less with shorter term aspirations and material objectives. Escape the happiness trap with family time shutterstock/Monkey Business Images 2. Set aside time for gratitude With so much that contributes to modern life pointing you towards the happiness trap, it's a good (and simple) idea to set aside time to recall moments of gratitude. By doing this regularly, you're much better positioned to see past the short-term nature of such messages and to keep an eye on what really contributes to your happiness. For instance, keep a gratitude journal where you count your blessings, such as the love of people close to you or your general health. In addition, writing letters of gratitude can help to reorientate your perspective on what really counts. There's something about the mental activity that goes on during the act of writing that helps to rebalance our cognitive processes and application of this can shape your feelings surrounding happiness. RELATED: The attitude of gratitude – 6 reasons how it will change your life 3. Be altruistic Studies have shown that practising altruism can help you to feel more satisfied and enable you to find happiness. Helping you to understand what is good about your life, altruistic acts are also of benefit to their recipient. Simply making the decision to be kinder and more understanding in your everyday interactions is a good first step. Once you start practising altruism regularly, you'll soon start feeling the power of kindness. “The pursuit of happiness can lead us in the wrong direction. This is what today's psychologists refer to as the happiness trap.” You might consider doing something practical, too, such as donating your blood. Or, by routinely committing to random acts of kindness or trying to make a loved one happy, you'll end up feeling more empowered about how happy you feel and less reliant on what other people think about you. The happiness trap: evolution of the human mind © YouTube/Dr. Russ Harris 4. Reaffirmation of your values Refocussing on your most important values is another key step in accepting the level of happiness you feel. Think of it like restating your marriage vows – if you ever made them, that is – as a means of getting back to basics. By reaffirming the true person that you are, it becomes possible to shake off sometimes years of misguided happiness that has become more and more reliant on a false idea of perfection: one that's modelled on an 'ideal' life as depicted in modern culture so much. Take a step back to focus on what makes you tick and reaffirm your commitment to it. 5. Savour every moment of life By taking the time to savour positive experiences in life, rather than rushing on hedonistically to the next chance of happiness, you're more likely to enjoy the moment. Think of a greedy diner who, enjoying their food, gulps it all down rapidly only to feel disappointed quickly afterwards, compared with someone who savours every mouthful. Both will consume the same amount of food but gain very different experiences from their meal. So, take your time and slow down. See the whole picture. Be mindful about everything. Focus on the positivity of any given situation in order to feel happier in yourself. The happiness trap: conclusions Modern life and the pursuit of joy makes it easy for humans to get stuck in the happiness trap. And, in this era of social media, it's harder to escape comparing your life, experiences and possessions with that of your friends or complete strangers. But, by following our tips based around CBT, you can start to reframe your thoughts and activities to become more satisfied with what you have in life, and – more importantly – who you are. ● Main image: shutterstock/Rawpixel.com happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member yet? Sign up for free now to: ■ enjoy our happiness magazine with practical life tips ■ share and support in our happiness forum ■ self-develop with free online classes in our Academy Coaching | Acceptance | Learning | Self-care Written by Ed Gould Ed Gould is a UK-based journalist and freelance writer. He's also a practitioner of Reiki.

What is gratitude meditation and how do you practise it? Sonia Vadlamani answers these questions plus explains five great benefits it brings. Plus, discover three great gratitude meditation YouTube videos to get you started. Do you want to reap more from your life – whether in the form of happiness, enriched relationships, enhanced sense of well-being or increased efficiency? Do you wish to amplify your existence and make life more meaningful, instead of feeling like you barely exist amidst the chaos of daily life? Gratitude meditation can help you achieve these things, and it's also one of the simplest meditation types you can practise. What is gratitude? Derived from the Latin word gratus, gratitude is the ability to feel thankful and show appreciation for all things good in your life. Have you ever observed how you feel a spur-of-the-moment gratefulness when someone does something kind for you, or surprised you with a lovely gesture or gift? The emotion you felt was that of gratitude, and studies show that practising thankfulness every day can help change your life for the better. In fact, scientific studies have found that gratitude can be the ‘social glue’ that promotes positive outlook, strengthens relationships, and help us to become better, happier human beings. What is gratitude meditation exactly? Gratitude meditation, as indicated by the name, is a kind of meditation centered on feeling grateful. While there are many other styles of meditations out there, gratitude meditation is one of the easiest you can practice anywhere, even in the midst of a hectic work schedule. What's more, it's also one of the most rewarding styles of meditation. JOIN US! Discover more about meditation at happiness.com. Belong to a community that cares Gratitude meditation focuses on bearing in mind various things you're thankful for in life and letting that feeling of appreciation take a stronghold inside yourself. For example, it could be appreciating family members who are always there for you, friends who always cheer you up, or colleagues who share the workload with you so you don’t have to do overtime. Great to be grateful: gratitude meditation has many benefits Additionally, you don't always have to meditate on a noticeable act – gratitude meditation also enables you to take pleasure in the simple things in life you're grateful for like the ability to see, hear, taste and walk, or something as intangible as the important lesson you learnt from a difficult phase you were going through at some point in your life. The origins of gratitude meditation Research suggests that the foundations of gratitude were inspired from religion. Mindfulness and meditation expert Jack Kornfield is quoted as saying: “Buddhist monks begin their day with chants of gratitude for their blessed lives. Meanwhile, Martin Luther described gratitude as the “basic Christian attitude”. Indeed, millions of Christians celebrate Thanksgiving every year to count their blessings and express their appreciation for all they have. “Gratitude meditation also enables you to take pleasure in the simple things in life, like the ability to see, hear, taste and walk.” Meanwhile, Hinduism advocates that “one with an attitude of gratitude is closest to achieving Moksh, or freedom from karmic life-cycles,”, states Uma Mysorekar, M.D. Do you have to be religious to practice gratitude? Of course not. Experts agree that gratitude is not limited to religious pursuits – you can be thankful for the gifts of life without being religious. Benefits of gratitude meditation There are many advantages to incorporating a gratitude meditation practice into your life. Here are five of the most important: 1. Greater sense of happiness Studies have shown that practising gratitude can consistently and effectively make you happier. Counting your blessings can make you feel more optimistic and help you develop and maintain a positive attitude throughout the day. Indeed, a study revealed that gratitude could be the most-needed positive intervention that can prevent depressive thoughts and help individuals lead a happier, content life. 2. Improved mental health Could you ever have guessed that gratitude meditation can also rewire your brain to be better equipped to deal with adversity or difficult phases of life? Practising gratitude meditation sensitizes the brain towards helpful acts and appreciable things in life, thus enabling us to break free from the endless loop of worries, rumination, fears and insecurities. 3. Stronger personal relationships Practising gratitude meditation has even been show to protect marriage and strengthen friendships. Expressing your thanks for friends, colleagues and spouse can make them feel appreciated and valued, reinforcing your bond with them and preventing miscommunication or conflict. 4. Better physical health Feeling grateful for good things in your life can make a difference in your outlook towards life, enabling you to feel better, live to the fullest and even sleep better. Indeed, grateful people are more likely to experience heightened state of mind, eat healthily, exercise more often and live longer. 5. Increased social circle Ever noticed how some people make friends effortlessly and instantly? Grateful individuals can trust more easily, express their appreciation in more straightforward fashion, and make friends with strangers with better ease. A 2014 study from the University of New South Wales (UNSW) Australia was the first to show that for thanking a new acquaintance for their help meant they were more likely to seek an ongoing social relationship with you. “Saying thank you provides a valuable signal that you're someone with whom a high quality relationship could be formed,” said UNSW psychologist Dr Lisa Williams, who co-conducted the research. Gratitude meditation: how to do it Great news: kickstarting a gratitude meditation routine is simple! All you need is a quiet corner and minimal time (10-20 minutes on average, depending on the technique you choose). “Gratitude meditation is one of the easiest you can practice anywhere, even in the midst of a hectic work schedule.” You could even start small, and simply be thankful for the basic amenities and privileges you have in life. Several experts (and even celebrities like Oprah) suggest that maintaining a gratitude journal to jot down all the things, actions, people etc you’re grateful for, can transform your outlook towards life tremendously. Here are three YouTube videos to inspire you to get your gratitude meditation routine up and running: The Mindful Movement: 10-Minute Morning Meditation for Gratitude This meditation can form a part of your morning ritual, preparing you to start the day on a more positive note. Ever feel trampled under the weight of senseless material pursuits, or dissatisfied by what you have achieved so far? Practising gratitude daily using this technique will open your eyes to the fact that what you have is enough, and that you are perfect. .embed-container { position: relative; padding-bottom: 56.25%; height: 0; overflow: hidden; max-width: 100%; } .embed-container iframe, .embed-container object, .embed-container embed { position: absolute; top: 0; left: 0; width: 100%; height: 100%; } Mary Kate: Gratitude Meditation To Shift Your Reality Using the powerful tool of Law of Attraction, this gratitude meditation technique shows you how to attract miracles in your life. Appreciating the smallest gestures and acts of kindness and being thankful for everything you have will help you manifest happiness and abundance every single day. .embed-container { position: relative; padding-bottom: 56.25%; height: 0; overflow: hidden; max-width: 100%; } .embed-container iframe, .embed-container object, .embed-container embed { position: absolute; top: 0; left: 0; width: 100%; height: 100%; } Dan Lok: 15-Minute Guided Gratitude Meditation for Abundance & Miracles Renowned business magnate and educator Dan Lok shows how to energize your day and attract abundance by being grateful for everything you have using a simple yet effective visualization technique. You begin by relaxing and asking yourself what and who all you're grateful for, and if there are things you're taking for granted. This meditation is very easy, and helps you develop more compassion, empathy and appreciation for everything good. .embed-container { position: relative; padding-bottom: 56.25%; height: 0; overflow: hidden; max-width: 100%; } .embed-container iframe, .embed-container object, .embed-container embed { position: absolute; top: 0; left: 0; width: 100%; height: 100%; } Round-up: gratitude meditation In conclusion, the benefits of gratitude meditation are many. Gratitude is not only a humble acknowledgment of how blessed our life is, but also a doorway for attracting abundance, happiness and prosperity our way. What's more, incorporating gratitude into our daily lives is very easy and hardly requires any additional effort. Are you getting started today? ● Main image: shutterstock/ WAYHOME Studio Liked this? Then check out Top 5 benefits of gratitude practice happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member yet? Sign up for free now to: ■ enjoy our happiness magazine with practical life tips ■ share and support others in our happiness forum ■ learn with free online classes in our happiness Academy Mental health | Compassion | Empathy Written by Sonia Vadlamani Fitness and healthy food blogger, food photographer and stylist, travel-addict. Sonia loves to write and has resolved to dedicate her life to revealing how easy and important it is to be happier, stronger and fitter each day. Follow her daily pursuits at FitFoodieDiary or on Instagram.

Most of us are trying to find greater happiness in our lives. Follow these 11 science-backed tips from Calvin Holbrook every day, and you could naturally boost your well-being. In today's modern and busy world, finding happiness can seem challenging. Our lives are more stressful than ever and we have less time to relax and enjoy life. The recent shift in mainstream media becoming increasingly negative only helps to fuel our anxiety and wider unease, leading to greater misery and unhappiness. Happiness is a state we all want to achieve, but is it even realistically possible to be upbeat and content the whole time? And what exactly is happiness? Would you consider it a way of life, a certain mood, or a state of mind? It's clear happiness levels fluctuate, but is there a way to increase or regulate them? In fact, as most of us have probably realized by now, there’s no magic way to stay joyful all the time. However, there is some science behind the nature of happiness. Furthermore, once we understand this, we can develop our skills to find happiness and remain joyful for longer periods consistently. So, follow these 11 science-backed ways to increase your levels of joy and you should be able to see a positive difference in your daily well-being and discover deeper happiness more easily. Finding happiness: 11 positive changes to make From staying social to practising gratitude: make these 11 changes to your life and start finding more happiness. 1. Stay social and build quality relationships Science is clear on this one: you can find and maintain happiness through developing quality relationships. We humans are a social species and need regular contact. In fact, loneliness is proven to decrease levels of happiness and recent studies show it can even be as harmful to mortality as smoking 15 cigarettes a day. But don’t start adding random people on Facebook just yet: simply having many different acquaintances doesn’t lead to a boost in happiness levels: it’s the quality of those relationships that's key. RELATED: How to make new friends as an adult In a landmark 75-year, multigenerational study, Robert Waldinger measured happiness levels in people from Boston’s poorest neighborhoods. He found that the most joyful were those with high-quality social connections. Lonely people were less happy and, significantly, had poorer health. Having a relationship with a stable and consistently caring person made the difference. So, take time to nurture more meaningful relationships with the people you love while also eliminating toxic friendships. Build your bliss: find happiness by staying close to great friends 2. Force out a smile Buddhist Thích Nhất Hạnh once wrote: “Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy.”’ In fact, studies have shown that smiling and other external expressions work as a continual feedback loop, helping to reinforce our internal emotions. Psychological scientists from the University of Kansas conducted a study in which they assessed the impact of smiling on one’s physical and mental state. They came to the conclusion that making yourself smile can help lower your heart rate during stressful activities. So, smiling even when we feel down or unhappy can actually makes us feel happier. Furthermore, try smiling at strangers, too: studies shows that happiness really is contagious, so you may just get a friendly grin back that lifts you up! This is an easy practical tip which can help you in finding happiness on a daily basis. 3. Find your 'flow' It sounds simple, but take time to think about what you really love doing in life and make an effort to do more of it. Go for simple things you can fit into your schedule on a daily or weekly basis. Maybe it’s being in nature. Perhaps it’s reading, wild swimming, visiting an art gallery, cooking a delicious meal, or just dancing around the living room. Whatever your daily happy buzz, make time for it in your life and it will help you in discovering greater happiness. Better still, if you can find an activity where your mind is fully immersed in a feeling of focus, involvement and enjoyment, you've probably found your flow. This blissful state, where you're totally 'in the zone' creates true moments of joy and helps your forget any worries. Find your flow: do what you love and find deeper happiness 4. Develop a more meaningful life Meaningfulness is a major happy factor that you can extend into your whole life. Whether it's through gardening, volunteering, or becoming politically active, meaningful activities have been shown to boost people's happiness and reduce stress levels at the same time. Indeed, a study from the Annals of Behavioral Medicine found that people who took part in leisure activities became 34 per cent less stressed and 18 per cent less sad. So, finding meaning can translate to finding happiness. 5. Think positive thoughts Some people seem to live by the ‘glass half full’ and ‘every cloud has a silver lining’ anecdotes, and for good reason. In fact, you can actually increase your happiness levels by focusing on positive things and reducing negative thinking. Here's a simple tip: every time you think a negative thought, try and replace it with a positive one. This practice will help to retrain your usual thought patterns to bring more positive thoughts into your life. “Science shows that writing a daily or weekly gratitude journal can make finding happiness easier.” Likewise, changing your perspective on your situation can help in discovering happiness too. If you’ve made a mistake – however big – focus on your past achievements instead, visualizing your successes. Learn more about how to stop ruminating and start living with hope and appreciation. 6. Practise gratitude Showing gratitude is proven to make you feel happier and more humble. We're often focused on what we don't have, but, instead, be grateful for what you do already have: your home, food on the table, clothing, and access to water/electricity. Many millions of people in the world don’t have these things (and, interestingly, many of them are still happy). RELATED: 5 benefits of gratitude practice Moreover, science shows that writing a daily or weekly gratitude journal can make finding happiness easier. The Journal of Happiness Studies published a study that used gratitude letters to test how being grateful can affect our levels of happiness. The researchers concluded that: “Participants included 219 men and women who wrote three letters of gratitude over a three-week period. Results indicated that writing letters of gratitude increased participants' happiness and life satisfaction while decreasing depressive symptoms.” So, put pen to paper before going to bed and be grateful for your day. Finding happiness: gratitude journals helps you appreciate life 7. Stop comparing yourself to others In our social media savvy world, flaunting your travels, relationships and purchases on Instagram is all too common. However, comparing yourself to other people will only lead to unhappiness. Indeed, data from a 2010 Europe-wide survey of 19,000 people showed that those who compared their incomes to others were less happy with what they had. Furthermore, while other people’s lives may appear ‘perfect’, there’s always a hidden story we’re unaware of. We usually only share our best moments on social media, rather than our darkest fears and anxieties. Instead of comparing yourself to others, focus on achieving your own dreams by goal setting. If needed, change your social media habits and/or delete accounts. 8. Exercise daily Working out is proven to boost levels of happiness. In fact, exercise has such a profound effect on well-being that it’s an effective strategy for tackling depression. In a study cited in The Happiness Advantage – a book by Shawn Achor – three groups of patients treated their depression with medication, exercise, or a combination of both. All three groups experienced similar improvements in their happiness levels in early days, but the later follow-up assessments proved very different. Six months later the groups were tested to assess their relapse rate. Of those that had taken the medication alone, 38 per cent had slipped back into depression. Those in the combination group did a little better, with a 31 per cent relapse rate. But with the exercise group, the relapse rate was just nice per cent, suggesting it really did make a difference to finding happiness. So, make sure you fit some exercise into your daily routine. If you’re struggling to find time to get to the gym, you could try mindful running or forest bathing to connect with nature. Wheel good for happiness: boost your well-being through exercise 9. Get plenty of sleep If you don’t rest well, you won’t be able to function at your best. Regular sleep deprivation breaks down our productivity, alertness and mood. Aim for between seven and nine hours kip a night and this will help keep your happiness levels up. A 2017 study from the Division of Sleep and Circadian Disorders at Brigham and Women's Hospital, and MIT Media Lab Affective Computing Group, showed that keeping regular sleep patterns contributes to the happiness and well-being of college students. The study looked at 204 students over one month. The results show that higher sleep regularity was significantly related to higher morning and evening happiness, healthiness and calmness during the week. “Starting your day with just five to ten minutes of meditation will help you in finding happiness. Try meditating in the morning, shortly after waking.” “Irregular sleep-wake schedules are common in our modern society," said lead author Akane Sano, PhD. “Our results indicate the importance of sleep regularity, in addition to sleep duration, and that regular sleep is associated with improved well-being.” Follow these 14 science-backed sleep hacks if you're struggling to get a decent night's kip. 10. Practise meditation Starting your day with just five to ten minutes of meditation will help you to find deeper happiness. Try meditating in the morning shortly after waking: the immediate heightened inner clarity and focus it will give you will set you up for the rest of the day. In fact, there are many studies that have shown that mediation can boost happiness levels by reducing stress hormones, shrinking the part of the brain that controls anxiety, and by stopping rumination, amongst other things. And, according to Psychology Today, meditation is the strongest mental practice that has the power to reset your happiness set point, thus turning you into a more joyful person and literally rewiring major areas in your brain so you can be happier. Feel the focus: finding deeper happiness through meditation 11. Go outside more often While we can’t control the weather, spending time outside is essential for our well-being. In The Happiness Advantage, Shawn Achor recommends spending time in the fresh air to improve your happiness. “Making time to go outside on a nice day also delivers a huge advantage,” he says. “One study found that spending 20 minutes outside in good weather not only boosted positive mood, but broadened thinking and improved working memory.” RELATED: Coastal living – 4 benefits of living by the sea Meanwhile, a study from the University of Sussex corroborated the idea that being outdoors made people happier: “Being outdoors, near the sea, on a warm, sunny weekend afternoon is the perfect spot for most. In fact, participants were found to be substantially happier outdoors in all natural environments than they were in urban environments.” So, whatever the weather, make sure you get outside of your four walls to boost your well-being. Finding happiness: the takeaway Finally, one last thing. Science also suggests that some people are simply ‘born happier’. Indeed, we all enter this world with different temperaments and often maintain a certain state of happiness over our lifetimes. In The How of Happiness, researcher Sonja Lyubomirsky suggests that only around 40 per cent of our happiness is under our control (recent life events and biological set points predetermine the other 60 per cent). So, if accurate, this research means only about half of happiness levels can be controlled at any given moment. If you can incorporate as many of these 11 steps into your daily life, you should be able to increase your happiness levels over a period of time. Seeking out a positive state of mind, practising certain actions, and enhancing quality relationships all help: but these habits require consistent work to be successful and help you in finding happiness. ● happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member yet? Sign up free to: ■ enjoy our happiness magazine ■ share and support in our happiness forum ■ self-develop with free online Academy classes Authenticity | Motivation | Courage | Success Written by Calvin Holbrook Calvin edits the happiness magazine, makes gay artwork and loves swimming, yoga, dancing to house/techno, and all things vintage! Find out more.

When Marilyn Coates-Lower packed up her life and went sailing the world, she faced her fears head-on. The experience was challenging and with dangers, but she also learnt a lot from her adventure. Here are the top five life lessons that she learnt. You'd be forgiven for assuming that I must have a long standing love of the sea and sailing. In fact, nothing could be further from the truth. As far as boats were concerned, back in the 1990s, I’d never been on anything smaller than a ferry. And, when I was just three years old, I almost drowned in the sea; only the quick thinking of my father, a serving police officer trained in CPR, saved my life. Although too young to appreciate it at the time, I truly believe that this experience, which I still remember vividly to this day, not only left me with a fear of deep water but also created an inbuilt sense of survival and adventure. I'm delighted to share five life lessons that have made me the person I am today, which could, perhaps, help someone else to always see the glass as ‘half-full’. So, here are the five life lessons I learned while simultaneously sailing the world: Life lesson 1: Don’t waste a single moment I moved from England to Ibiza, one of the Spanish Balearic Islands, in 1986, and, to my delight, my mother and stepfather decided to follow me out there in 1989, after their retirement. I was so fortunate to experience the pleasure and the happiness this brought – actually developing a friendship with my mother, rather than just seeing her as a parent. Then, in 1991, she was rushed to a hospital and died just a week later, having been diagnosed with acute leukaemia. This was a life-changer for me. My mother was only 68 and believed that she still had many years ahead of her. After she passed, I decided not to waste a single moment of my life and have never looked back. So, for all of you that still have mothers (and fathers), be sure to spend time with them, no matter how busy life gets or how complicated your relationship. Ask them questions that need answers now because, one day, as I discovered, it will be too late. Life lesson one: spend time with family shutterstock/fizkes Life is to be lived, and I truly believe that if you're miserable, sad or experiencing depression or grief, then it's time for a change, however radical. I had many wonderful friends in Ibiza who rallied around me – two, in particular, were keen sailors, working for a local day charter company. They took me for a day's sailing on a 35-foot yacht, to the beautiful island of Formentera. This was one of those extraordinary life lessons for me, as, although my fear of deep water was very much present, I realised that sailing itself was amazing and I didn't need to get my feet wet (although getting on and off the boat was a major challenge!). Life lesson 2: Never turn your back on an adventure So, a plan was formed, the 40-foot yacht purchased, and my first ever long-distance sailing trip to Gibraltar undertaken. After an incredibly scary trip around Capo de Gata in gale-force winds, with VHF radio support from several other yachts also trying to stay afloat, we stopped off at several Spanish Costa resorts, during which time I seriously reconsidered the wisdom of what I was doing. However, determined not to give into my fears, I concentrated on the many adventures and life lessons ahead, including my first-ever visit to Gibraltar. “Life lesson one: life is to be lived, and I truly believe that if you're miserable, sad or grieving, then it's time for a change, however radical.” Gibraltar greeted us with high winds and an engine that wouldn't start, driving us towards the dangers of the rock itself. Fortunately, a passing fishing boat realised the peril we were in and came close enough for us to throw a rope so that they could tow us in. This act of kindness has led to a lifelong friendship with the fishing boat skipper, now retired and living in Spain. After a major refit of the yacht and six wonderful weeks on the 'Rock’, we set sail for the Canary Islands, visiting most of them before stopping at Gran Canaria, in readiness to stock up with supplies for the ten-day Atlantic crossing. Life lesson 3: Never let your fears get the better of you Out on the open sea, with no land in sight, seemingly all should have been safe and well. However, nothing could be further from the truth. There are constant dangers present, from whales through to cargo ships operating on autopilot while the crew sleeps. Upon leaving the port, I felt confident that the yacht was highly visible, with her red sails, and large enough to be able to be seen at all times. This false confidence soon became apparent when, on the fifth night, during stormy weather and a big swell, I realised just how insignificant we were when we were almost mown down by a massive cargo ship which, quite simply, could not see us. Stay afloat, don't give into fear: another life lesson shutterstock/Dudarev Mikhail Frightening though this was, the danger was averted by a hard tack, leaving me wondering what on earth I was doing on this tiny – as was now apparent – 40-foot boat! When I gazed up at the sky, and the stars were so vast and close that I felt as though I could reach up and grab one. I've never seen stars and such a black sky like this since, and, despite having been extremely frightened, I knew that I was embarking on a once in a lifetime challenge which would ensure that nothing would scare me again. Life lesson 4: See the beauty in everything Ten days is a long time to be on a relatively small yacht with two other people. The Atlantic swell and 24-hour watch shifts soon began to take their toll and tempers start to get frayed through lack of sleep and privacy. This left us with a choice: either suffer in silence or make the best of it. We, of course, decided on the latter, especially after discovering with gratitude the sheer beauty and peacefulness of the night time watches; life lessons were coming thick and fast. The sunrises and sunsets were stunning, and, during the hours of darkness, almost every stellar constellation could be seen with total clarity by the naked eye. “I realised that no matter how serious challenges are, there is always something extraordinary afterwards. This was an essential lesson in life.” Dolphins playing in the wake of the boat would follow us for hours, man-of-war jellyfish, with their stunning colours, would float by, deadly yet incredibly beautiful. The bluest of skies and, in light winds, the red, yellow, green and blue of the cruising chute billowing out on the bow; all these wonderful life experiences made the inconveniences of life on board pale into insignificance. Life lesson 5: Happiness and contentment is inside us all We encountered several bad storms while sailing the world, including a hurricane, while at sea, but managed to survive relatively unscathed, mainly, I have to say, due to the sailing skills of my companions. We experienced cruising from one gorgeous Caribbean island to another and then on to the South American coastline, during which important life lessons were learned. RELATED: Happiness is a choice The sheer happiness of arriving at a beautiful anchorage, just metres away from a deserted sandy beach; dropping anchor and going ashore to explore cannot be underestimated. Then, back to the boat, sitting on the deck watching the sun dip below the horizon while sipping a Jamaican white rum and cola: this is true contentment. I realised that no matter how serious challenges are, there is always something extraordinary afterwards, even if it is, simply, just the fact that I have survived and am looking forward to the next adventure. The big life questions There is a big question asked by Gerri Luce LCSW, a licensed clinical social worker: “Are happiness and contentment the same thing?” According to Luce, they are not, and, whilst I agree with her to some degree, in other ways I don’t, as she focuses on our need to be one of two; I feel that it goes much deeper than this. Indeed, Arthur Dobrin D.S.W. asks another question. “Can you live alone and be happy?” Having experienced the solitude of night watches through to sharing a relatively small space with my friends, I do not feel, for myself, that living alone and having one's own space is a bad thing. This is perhaps one of my most valuable life lessons: we all make our own decisions, many of which can make or break us. Life is too short, and this is why I never waste a single moment regretting even wrong moves; this, for me, makes happiness and contentment the same thing. ● happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member yet? Sign up for free now to enjoy these benefits: ■ our happiness magazine with practical life tips and inspiration ■ share knowledge and help support others in our happiness forum ■ learn and self-develop with free online classes in our happiness Academy Resilience | Nature | Family activities | Meditation Written by Marilyn Coates-Lower I'm a free spirit who wakes up with a smile every morning. My life has been an adventure and, although now officially retired, I continue to work as a writer and proofreader. I live in a stunning part of Brittany, France, together with my horse and cat, enjoying views of the woods that surround my house and across the valley to the village. By way of my experiences, I hope to inspire people, through my writing, to become more positive, happy and forward thinking.

Combining the scientific knowledge about meditation with advice on personal and spiritual growth, 6 phase meditation can help us live more compassionate and fulfilled lives. Dee Marques explains the benefits of this meditation style and how to practise it. We’ve all heard about the benefits of meditation: greater clarity, a strong focus on the positive, and the unrestricted flow of energy. But I won’t lie: getting into meditation is tough, and being consistent is even tougher. One of the main things stopping people from starting a meditation practice is that it takes time, and you need to do it daily if you want to get the best possible results. But we all have busy lives and we all know how difficult it is to make time for ourselves. Another thing stopping people from trying meditation is the huge amount of choices out there. Mindfulness, vipassana, body scan and guided meditation are some of the most popular meditation styles, but even choosing among these can be overwhelming for a beginner. Where do you start? How do you know you’re on the right track? And how do you fight distraction and lack of motivation? I’ve been there, so I’m always looking for ways to be more consistent in my meditation practice. I recently came across a meditation technique that seems to tick all the boxes: 6 phase meditation. So today I want to share how this technique can enrich your life. What is 6 phase meditation? So-called 6 phase meditation was developed by Vishen Lakhiani. He's the award-winning founder of Mindvalley, a company focused on using technology to promote personal growth and spiritual development. Lakhiani is also a well-known author of best-selling books covering topics like self transformation and unleashing the power of our mind to achieve success. 6 phase meditation incorporates six distinct steps 6 phase meditation is one of the programmes available from the Mindvalley website. This is one of the things I liked the most about it. The programme format is presented in an easy-to-follow and structured way. This takes out all the guesswork involved in figuring things out by yourself, so you can jump straight into the sessions. The 6 phase meditation course is free to enrol on (although sign-up to the site is required). The idea behind 6 phase meditation itself is to combine scientific knowledge about how our brain works as well as the most effective and transformational advice published in the world of personal and spiritual growth. This guided meditation programme tackles common roadblocks in meditation practice so you can prevent the things that lead many people to give it up after a few days or weeks: a restless mind, self doubt, or the struggle trying to apply ancient principles to our modern lives. “The idea behind 6 phase meditation is to combine scientific knowledge about how our brain works with transformational advice published in the world of personal and spiritual growth.” According to Lakhiani, meditation isn’t about clearing your mind. He accepts that the brain is meant to be constantly working, so the programme focuses on redirecting our brain power. The main goals of 6 phase meditation are helping you win the battle against anxiety and stress, connecting with your creative and intuitive side, boosting happiness and productivity, and living more compassionate and fulfilling lives. To achieve all this, the concept of abundance is key in every stage of 6 phase meditation. With this technique we can identify the ways in which we sometimes self-sabotage, then get rid of anything that holds us back from reaching true abundance and a sense of purpose. This is one of the fundamental benefits of meditation practice. How to practise 6 phase meditation Completing the full 6 phase meditation training programme only takes seven days. During these seven days, you’ll need to set apart 15 to 20 minutes to follow the online sessions and go through each of the six phases. Here’s an overview of the main stages of 6 phase meditation: 1. Connection The first step in 6 phase meditation is developing a sense of connection with yourself and your surroundings. Consciousness is the main enabler of this deep sense of connection, so it helps to visualise it as a bright warm light. Picture the light as it starts wrapping up your body then gradually expands to everything else: your house, your neighbourhood, your city, your country, and the entire planet, all while being aware of your connection to it. 2. Gratitude During the second step of 6 phase meditation the focus is finding things to be grateful for. Lakhiani suggests making a mental list of five to ten things you’re thankful to have in your life. You may even find more once you get started. They could be anything from having good health to the pleasant scent of your favourite herb in the kitchen window sill. Then, amplify the sense of gratitude by immersing yourself in how you experience these things through your five senses and recreate the experience. RELATED: Gratitude meditation Visualization is a key step in 6 phase meditation shutterstock/fizkes 3. Forgiveness Finding abundance in our lives is difficult if we hold grievances against others, as doing this deprives us from the benefits of forgiveness. Asking forgiveness doesn’t need to be done in person, and unfortunately some of the people we had conflict with in the past are no longer with us. However, it’s still possible to reach out to them in our minds, ask forgiveness, and replace conflict with peace. Once you let go of negative emotions, you’ll start to feel how the sense of connection developed in Stage 1 glows even brighter. 4. Visualization The fourth step of 6 phase meditation takes you through a vivid visualization of your future so you can finally start living the life you want. Lakhiani’s advice is to choose three areas of your life where you’d like to see improvement. For example, they could be family relationships, work and fitness. During the session, you’re asked to visualize how you’d like them to unfold within the next three years. Then, make the experience real by drawing in your five senses into the visualization. “The main goals of 6 phase meditation are helping you win the battle against anxiety and stress, connecting with your creative side, boosting happiness and productivity, and living more compassionate and fulfilling lives.” 5. Daily intention The purpose of this session is to help you realise that our future starts with what we choose to do on a daily basis. During the daily intention stage, the focus is on visualising what it would be like to live the best possible version of your day. Think about what would you be doing, how would you be feeling, what specific emotions would you experience. Then imagine what would be your ideal way to end the day and picture yourself drifting into the most restful and rejuvenating sleep. 6. Blessing The last step in 6 phase meditation involves calling for the support you need to make your present and future goals achievable. Whether you believe in religious higher powers or rely on your own inner strength, it’s important to feel that you have an external force blessing you with energy, motivation, and even luck. During this session, you’ll spend a few moments noticing the effect of this protective force. To get started with 6 phase meditation, you can sign up for the programme via the Mindvalley website. Vishen Lakhiani has also put together a series of YouTube videos where he eases you into this guided meditation and takes you through each stage. You can find these videos in the official Mindvalley channel. The takeaway Although 6 phase meditation is perfect for beginners or those who struggled getting into meditation in the past, it also suits anyone who wants to take personal growth a step further. Following the programme and making meditation an integral part of your life can change the brain structure and bring important benefits, like the ability to override unhelpful responses and giving you more control over automatic reactions. You’ll also be able to develop compassionate and positive behaviour and boost your emotional intelligence. Bringing this attitude into every interaction can help build more meaningful relationships and generate a peaceful state of mind. And lastly, you’ll be more conscious about how your thoughts influence your actions and how your brain already has the tools you need to build the future you want, day by day without losing sight of your goals. ● Main image: shutterstock/javi_indy happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member? Sign up for free now to: ■ enjoy our happiness magazine ■ share and support in our happiness forum ■ learn with free online Academy classes Kundalini meditation | How to forgive someone | Vedic meditation Written by Dee Marques A social sciences graduate with a keen interest in languages, communication, and personal development strategies. Dee loves exercising, being out in nature, and discovering warm and sunny places where she can escape the winter.

Journaling isn’t just for teenagers. As Arlo Laibowitz explains, jotting down your thoughts, plans and reflections can help you with self-development. Check out these six different journaling techniques and the many benefits they will bring to your life. Many of us have started writing a diary or journal at some points in our lives. And many of us have also stopped writing in them not that much later! Many famous artists, writers, entrepreneurs, inventors, and thinkers keep, or have kept, journals, and there are many different journaling techniques. For many, it's a creative necessity and outlet. For some, it's a place for exploration, and yet for others, it's an art form in itself. Journaling can be enriching and fulfilling on many levels. It can lead to insights, personal growth, and setting and achieving goals. Journals record our thoughts, feelings and reflections. In doing so, they create a through-line in our life, a place of refuge and reflection, that we can visit and revisit. Personally, I started journaling some years ago, as part of the Morning Papers practice of The Artist’s Way. I've written notebooks full of journal entries related to personal growth, gratitude, creative development, project ideas, personal insecurities, blocked traumas, to-do-lists, goals, dreams and much more. I've tried different journal techniques for weeks or months at a time – and have also not journaled for weeks in between entries! Every time I come back to the practice and sustain it on a regular basis, I feel I can go deeper, explore things more explicit, and in the process, experience a wonderful journey to my interior. So, what are the benefits of journaling? And what different journaling techniques can we employ? How do we go about starting and sustaining a journaling habit? Dream diaries: keep track of your dreams... or maybe your ambitions? What are the benefits of journaling? In different studies, journaling has been identified as a so-called 'keystone habit', a habit that is defining and catalysing more habits in your life. As Charles Duhig writes in The Power of Habit, these keystones are “small changes or habits that people introduce into their routines that unintentionally carry over into other aspects of their lives.” The benefits of journaling are emotional, cognitive, creative and possibly even spiritual. Journaling helps us to: Know ourselves better, by clarifying our thoughts and feelings. Release thoughts and emotions, by recognizing and tracking them. Increase focus, deepen our learning and problem solving, in ‘decluttering’ our minds. Boost stability, detach and let go of the past; similar as in meditation practices, by developing our awareness of our thoughts and letting go of our clinging to them. Resolve disagreements with others, by detaching ourselves from the conflict and reflecting on it. Furthermore, studies show that keeping a gratitude journal offers some added benefits. People that keep a gratitude journal are happier, healthier, more balanced and generally more optimistic. They are less self-centered, and less susceptible to feelings of envy, more relaxed, better in decision-making, and more strengthened in their emotions and developed in their personality. Journaling: six different techniques 1. Enso drawing There are various forms of journaling. We can choose a traditional way, with pen and paper, or write in an electronic journal, use various media, or add art practices to our journaling (like drawings or collages, or even specialised forms like enso drawing). 2. Ten minute routine An easy technique to start journaling is practising the Ten minute routine. Before going to bed, ask yourself so-called “requests” – the things that you're trying to accomplish – and write them down. Then, in the morning, write down your answers and thoughts on these questions. This way of journaling is especially efficient to review and sharpen your to-do-list and life vision, as they become forged in your subconscious mind. “There are many journaling techniques. For many, it's a creative necessity and outlet. For others, it's an art form in itself.” 3. Stream of consciousness Another tried way to journal is journaling every day in a stream of consciousness. Write down any thought, memory, to-do-list, feeling, drawing, or whatever else pops up. Just let it flow as you write, without trying to censor or edit yourself. 4. Morning memories A different journaling technique is writing 'morning memories'. Schedule your journaling session each morning, before you start your day. Use the same journal every day, sit in the same spot, and when you’re done writing, take time to reflect on what you've written and accomplished in that session. RELATED: Morning meditation – the secret to a great day 5. Gratitude journaling Probably the most researched journaling technique is keeping a gratitude journal. For maximum benefit, take 15 minutes per day, three to four times a week, to journal what you're grateful for on that day. Be specific, choose depth of gratitude instead of breadth, and try to get personal (being thankful to people is more efficient than to things). Make a note of seeing good things as a gift, savoring surprises and unexpected events. Journaling techniques: start putting pen to paper 6. Intensive journal A comprehensive method of journaling is using the intensive journal process. This copyrighted process, which can be learned in specialised workshops, enables the person journaling to get to know themselves on profound levels. “People that keep a gratitude journal are happier, healthier, more balanced, and generally more optimistic.” The Intensive Journal Workbook is a large notebook filled with paper and divided into four dimensions of human experience: Life/Time, Dialogue, Depth and Meaning. Each of these aspects is divided into several subsections to work through in the path that the method prescribes. Some of these paragraphs are used to write about our memory of the events of our lives as well as dreams and images. Others are more geared towards stimulating insights and creative activity. How to start and sustain a journaling habit There are as many ways to initiate and maintain your journaling, as there are different forms of journaling. A straightforward way to start journaling is by starting every day with writing down tasks and goals that you have for that day. Only write a few items, to make it easy to start and make progress. It's useful to mix personal and professional things. By keeping each journal entry short in the beginning, it's easy to succeed. At the end of each day, look back at what you've accomplished, what you've learned, what you want to explore further, and what you want to pursue the next day. Once you've developed a basic journaling practice, you can dig deeper and further expand it. Some commonly held beliefs and ‘best practices’ include: Start writing about where you are in your life at this moment, and build on that in subsequent journal entries. Start a dialogue with your inner child by writing in your non-dominant hand, and switching back to your dominant hand. For sustaining your gratitude practice, maintain a daily list of things you appreciate, including uplifting quotes. Start a journal of self-portraits; draw, write, or collage who you are today, and learn to appreciate and develop yourself. Keep a nature diary to connect with the natural world: record what you experience in looking at the sky experiences the weather or walks in nature. Maintain a log of successes, starting with big ones that you remember, and then add them as they occur. Keep a log or playlist of your favourite songs. Write about the moods and memories they trigger. If there’s something you're struggling with or an event that’s disturbing you, write about it in the third person to create distance and perspective. Journal techniques: travels to our interior Journaling is a powerful habit that enables us to get a more in-depth and clearer understanding of the thoughts, feelings and issues we're working through. Whether we use journaling to accompany our meditation, forgiveness, or gratitude practices, or to work through emotional trauma or creative stumble blocks, a daily practice enables us to focus and develop further. Trying different journaling techniques has given me many benefits in life. I wish you the same journey as you explore your journaling practice! ● Images: Cathryn Laver, Ben White, Haley Powers, Estée Janssens on Unsplash happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member yet? Sign up for free now to enjoy: ■ our happiness magazine with practical life tips ■ share and support in our happiness forum ■ self-develop with free online classes in our Academy Stress management | Mindfulness | Burnout Written by Arlo Laibowitz Arlo is a filmmaker, artist, lecturer, and intermittent practitioner of metta meditation and morning yoga. When not dreaming about impossible projects and making them happen in the most impractical ways possible, he journals, listens to jazz, or cuddles with his better half.

The benefits of developing a gratitude practice are proven by science. From stronger relationships to self-improvement, Dee Marques examines the five key advantages to always being grateful... Gratitude and happiness often go hand in hand, especially when gratefulness is seen as something essential in our daily lives and not just as a passing emotion. Indeed, science shows that far from being a monolithic concept, gratefulness is a complex emotion with real advantages. Indeed, if you start practicing gratitude then you can expect real physical, social and cognitive benefits. So, what is gratitude and gratefulness exactly? Essentially, gratitude is the affirmation of goodness in our lives and the world, of the gifts and benefits we receive, and the recognition that the source of this goodness is outside of us. Practising gratitude: the benefits Taking time to be grateful has many advantages that can make a real difference to our daily lives. As well as allowing us to be mindful and celebrate the present, here are five key reasons to pick up a gratitude practice – the benefits of doing so are all backed up by science. 1. Stronger relationships The social dimension of gratitude is one of the most important benefits of setting up and/or persevering with a gratitude practice. It can help us build stronger relationships because by practising it, we're acknowledging not only the existence of things to be grateful for in life but also – and more importantly – we're acknowledging the source of those things. In the majority of cases, the origins can be traced back to other people, whether they're family members (such as your partner preparing your favourite meal), or strangers (the postman delivering your mail, farmers producing the foods that will be on your table, etc.). Be grateful for simple things, such as your partner's cooking When we think about how other people improve and bring pleasure to our lives, our appreciation for them increases naturally. Noticing the small things and how they came about can be a real eye-opener. It helps us feel more interconnected – part of the whole – and in unity with the world that surrounds the people in it and us. The result? We're less likely to feel lonely or isolated and more likely to live a meaningful life. “Scientific findings have proven that gratefulness is a complex emotion with real advantages. Indeed, if you start practising gratitude then you can expect real physical, social, and cognitive benefits.” The link between gratitude practice and stronger or more fulfilling relationships is not just subjective: researchers at the University of Manchester have established that gratitude influences our perception of social support, encourages reciprocity, and helps create a more supportive environment. 2. Higher cognitive functioning Practicing gratitude also has the potential benefit of turning us into better functioning individuals, and science leaves little room for doubt about this. Dr Christina M. Karns from the University of Oregon carried out extensive research into the neurological aspects of gratitude. Her findings (which you can learn about here, especially in the second half of video) revealed that brain imaging scans show how practicing gratitude activates two areas of the brain that are responsible for processing information for decision-making purposes. This has been confirmed by studies at other universities, which showed that grateful individuals were more likely to be patient in receiving rewards and made better decisions in the long term, whereas individuals who were not feeling grateful when faced with a choice preferred immediate rewards even if those were not as beneficial. “The social dimension of gratitude is one of the most important benefits of setting up and/or persevering with a gratitude practice.” Researchers concluded that there's a connection between gratefulness and self-control. Combined, these two virtues can help us become more rational and focused when making decisions. Even better, research at two universities in the USA shows that feeling grateful releases dopamine, a 'happiness hormone' that keeps neurons functioning and, according to Science Daily, can increase motivation and energy levels. Practices like letter writing or keeping a gratitude journal were also shown to help people achieve their goals more consistently, and this only makes sense. Consciously and intentionally setting aside some time to reflect on the reasons we have to feel grateful sets a precedent for analytical thinking, which can then be extended to other aspects of our lives: the benefit of gratitude practice are clear. 3. Happier and more positive emotions When being grateful becomes an integral part of who we are, savouring the little pleasures in life becomes an essential part of our day-to-day routine. And the more grateful we feel, the more enjoyment we can get out of life. This is more than just a hypothesis. A paper published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology suggested that gratitude is strongly related to other positive emotions like life satisfaction, a sense of control, and hope. At the same time, the study found an unlikely correlation between the feeling of gratefulness and negative emotions, such as depression, envy, and anxiety. One benefit of writing a gratitude journal is hitting your goals From a scientific point of view, our brains have a built-in negativity bias that makes us more likely to remember bad experiences than good ones. This happens because negative events trigger an adrenaline rush that engraves negative feelings and memories in the brain. But another benefit of gratitude practice is that it can help re-wire our brains to overcome this bias. RELATED: Gratitude practice (and how it can change your life) Indeed, research shows that gratitude boosts our resilience and gives us reasons to be happy, even in difficult times, establishing a link between gratefulness and the ability to cope better with problems and stress. Other studies have shown that people suffering from depression reported a 35 per cent reduction in their symptoms after starting a thoughtful gratitude practice. Additionally, it's interesting to note that gratefulness seems to have a cumulative effect, as participants reported that happiness levels kept increasing over time. So if you practice gratefulness continuously, the benefits could grow, too. 4. Self-improvement When all the benefits of gratitude practice discussed so far are taken into consideration, it's evident that being grateful is an excellent way of boosting our opportunities for self-growth and personal development. In fact, bringing gratefulness into our lives can transform our personalities for the better. Scientific studies conducted in 2010 suggested that this emotion serves as an intermediary between positive personality traits and emotional well-being, especially when it comes to areas like self-acceptance, purpose in life, openness to others, and autonomy. The beauty of this is that there's no way of predicting where a gratitude practice will take you, as adopting gratefulness is like going on a journey of personal discovery. 5. Better overall health Grateful living has advantages that we can experience at a physical level, too. Dr Robert Emmons, a professor of psychology at the University of California, is a well-known expert in the science of gratefulness, who affirms that gratitude practice can be beneficial to our bodies and improve our overall well-being. Practice makes perfect: gratitude for exercise keeps you motivated Research carried out by Dr Emmons and his team highlighted the mind-body connection and showed that grateful individuals tend to be more aware of how their lifestyle choices affect their health. For example, being thankful for how good exercise makes us feel is likely to keep us motivated to work out frequently, and in turn, regular activity is linked to a stronger immune system, lower cholesterol levels, and lower blood pressure. “It's interesting to note that gratefulness seems to have a cumulative effect, as participants reported that happiness levels kept increasing over time. ” On that note, practising gratefulness appears to be good for our hearts too, quite literally so. Scientists at the University of California, San Diego, examined people who were at high risk of experiencing heart disease and who also kept a gratefulness journal and found that their symptoms worsened at a slower rate than participants who didn't follow the same practice. RELATED: Gratitude yoga And in case that wasn't good enough, feelings of gratefulness cause higher activity in the hypothalamus, a part of the brain that regulates sleep patterns, metabolism, and stress levels. Benefits of gratitude practice: conclusions As you can see, the benefits of incorporating gratefulness practices into your daily life are enormous. Why not give it a try and experience first hand the transformative power of gratitude? One of the best things about being grateful is that it's simple and doesn't cost a thing! ● Do you have a gratitude practice? How has it changed your life? Share with the happiness.com community below or in the Forum... Main image: colourbox.com Written by Dee Marques A social sciences graduate with a keen interest in languages, communication, and personal development strategies. Dee loves exercising, being out in nature, and discovering warm and sunny places where she can escape the winter.

Gratitude was always part of her happiness routine, but when Sienna Saint-Cyr started practising yoga for gratitude, she found a new lightness, peace and energy within. Gratitude – and gratitude yoga – is a catalyst for happiness. When we're grateful for what we have, we stop focusing on the things we lack. But why exactly? Gratitude expert Robert Emmons shares that when people help one another, they feel happier. The actions they take release the feel-good hormone oxytocin. It's this same chemical that positive touch activates. So, while gratitude itself doesn't release the happiness hormone, the actions we take when we are full of gratitude do. From my personal experience, I know that holding gratitude in my heart and mind always leads me to feel happier. For me, it’s not just the actions I take but the reminder that I have so much to be thankful and appreciative for. That alone can get my thinking from dark and depressed to being full of joy. Gratitude is a vital step in my happiness and the benefits of gratitude practice are many. Gratitude yoga: what is it? Since I’d already tried compassion yoga with Adriene, I wanted to try 'Grounding Into Gratitude – Root Chakra Yoga' with her as well. Gratitude – in my experience – is more practical as opposed to just a ‘feeling’, so incorporating it into my yoga practice sounded like an excellent method for increasing my gratitude and, therefore, happiness. “Gratitude and gratitude yoga is a catalyst for happiness. When we're grateful for what we have, we stop focusing on what we lack.” Right from the start, Adriene asked that we trust ourselves, her, and the gratitude yoga practice. She opens with a request that we are the ‘observer’. It made perfect sense, since, in order to feel full of gratitude, we have to be able to observe the good happening around us. It takes us from a place of internal focus and allows us to look outward. This video is also shorter than the last, only about 30 minutes. So it’s a good one for those that don’t have a full hour for daily practice. .embed-container { position: relative; padding-bottom: 56.25%; height: 0; overflow: hidden; max-width: 100%; } .embed-container iframe, .embed-container object, .embed-container embed { position: absolute; top: 0; left: 0; width: 100%; height: 100%; } Gratitude yoga from Adriene Connecting to chakras Next, Adriene has the practitioners focus their energy in their root chakra, which is the space right behind the pubic bone. Our root chakra is our base, foundation, our connection to the Earth and the physical. When it's out of balance, we can experience higher levels of negativity, trouble eating, greater insecurity, greediness, and more. With all the negative aspects of the root being out of balance, having a practice that focuses on balance seemed the right choice. While I mentioned the heart chakra in compassion yoga, I didn't get much into it. But in this case, understanding chakras is helpful as they're often used in yoga to focus on a particular area of the body, an energy flow. The chakras are associated with seven energy points in the body, colours, organs, and they have corresponding yoga poses to help balance them. Because yoga and balancing the mind, body, and spirit are very connected to the thoughts in our heads, Yoga Journal uses words like ‘imagine’, which took the idea of the chakras from a place of ‘this is real, and therefore we must prove it’ to a place of ‘this is real in my mind and therefore, helpful for visualisations during my practice’. I mention this because when I go to therapy, we often discuss the differences between things that are proven scientifically and things we simply believe. Belief is powerful; there’s no doubt about it. But science and belief aren't the same. So, if you're new to the idea of chakras and desire a science-based explanation, you might do better with the idea of chakras as visualisations as opposed to actual energy points in the body. For our purposes here, the root is our base and our balance. Gratitude yoga: the practice The first gratitude yoga pose in which I felt my energy and grounding – or connection to the earth – was the Malasana pose. It was hard to stay in it at first, as I felt unbalanced. But I kept trying. Slowly, my hips opened. I felt my energy shoot from my root down through the floor and into the earth, then fresh energy back up into me. I visualized this energy, and the more I did so, the sturdier I felt. Gratitude yoga: Malasana pose Finally, I was able to stay in the gratitude yoga pose and fully embrace that feeling of balance, which then led to me feeling so much giddy happiness. Because when I feel balanced, I feel like I can trust myself, and that is a vital step in maintaining my joy. During a variation of Malasana, Adriene has the practitioner work with their feet. She mentions that feet are an essential step in finding grounding. Since my feet often ache, I took what she said to heart and massaged my feet while rocking back and forth in a sort of frog-like squat. It’s close to Malasana, but not quite the same. “Slowly my hips opened. I felt my energy shoot from my root down through the floor and into the earth, then fresh energy back up into me!” I found this helped me relax into the more challenging poses later on. If I was struggling with balance, I rubbed the bottoms of my feet for 30 seconds, and I was instantly able to balance more efficiently. Another gratitude yoga pose I found helpful was called Humble Warrior. I’d done Warrior pose many times, even Peaceful Warrior, but not Humble. I was amazed how much this pose released in my body. All the tension I carry in my shoulders and neck began to loosen, and the longer I maintained the posture, the more I felt the release. Yoga for gratitude: Humble Warrior pose Gratitude yoga: 'I am,' and happiness I can’t deny that when I finished the video that I felt lighter, more grounded, connected to Earth, and at peace with myself. One of the mantras Adriene used — because as she stated in the video, it relates to the root chakra — was ‘I am’. During the entire session, I focused on gratitude for all the wonderful people in my life, for the healing in myself that I've allowed happening and worked so hard for, and also the thought 'I am'. I kept repeating ‘I am’ in my head. Sometimes I’d say it aloud. Each time, I felt more accepting of myself. Less judgement and self-shaming behaviour for all the things I am not. I've known about ‘I am’ for years now. In fact, my first introduction to it was when I was young and being raised in a religious household. I was told that this was God’s response when asked what he was. Later I was shown meditations and Native American and Buddhist practices that also incorporated it. “When I finished the gratitude yoga video I felt lighter, more grounded, connected to Earth, and at peace with myself.” But I didn't understand that really all ‘I am’ means is acceptance and embracing of the self. It’s not to embrace my bad habits, but to embrace that I have those bad habits and to choose to love myself anyway. It’s in accepting myself fully that I find the ability to break my bad habits. Not only is the mantra ‘I am’ helpful for self-acceptance, but it’s also useful for gratitude toward others, as well as affirmations: I am thankful… I am grateful… I am happy… Self-acceptance is an important step on our path to happiness. In fact, self-help books and too-large goal setting can lead to unhappiness. There's a ‘should be’ and ‘should do’ mentality and it directly leads to ‘I am not enough’. The right place to start with developing one self though is self-acceptance and being happy enough. While self-acceptance – 'I am' – can result in seeing our worth as we are. As I mentioned above, this isn't reason to perpetuate bad habits. What it is is an opportunity for embracing ourselves and loving who we are. I feel gratitude, the ‘I am’ mantra, and happiness are connected. I didn't possess any of these until I jumped onto the wheel (as I see it in my mind’s eye). Once I had gratitude, I felt happier. Once I felt happier, I was able to accept the parts of myself that I was judging. Then when I let go of self-judgement, I felt a deeper level of gratitude. If I stay on this wheel, these things feed one another, and I end up feeling each stronger. Give yoga for gratitude a try and also read on for yoga for moodswings, part three of this series. Namaste! ● Main image: colourbox.com. Other images: Yoga with Adriene Written by Sienna Saint-Cyr Sienna Saint-Cyr is an author, advocate, and the founder of SinCyr Publishing. She speaks at conventions, workshops, and for private gatherings on the importance of having a healthy body image, understanding enthusiastic consent, using sexuality to promote healing, navigating diverse or non-traditional relationships, having Complex PTSD, and more. Sienna loves sharing her journey of healing and finding happiness with her readers. Along with writing erotica and romance, Sienna speaks at conventions, workshops, and for private gatherings on such sex-positive topics as a healthy body image, using sexuality to promote healing, and navigating diverse or non-traditional relationships. She writes for several websites. Find out more. happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member yet? 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Practicing gratitude is a simple way to deal with bad situations and is scientifically proven to have a positive pay off on your health. Arlo Laibowitz examines the ways to be thankful and the benefits. The benefits of practicing gratitude are many. When we're going through tough times, or don’t feel satisfied with life, it's natural to focus on what we lack and take the things that we do have for granted. That's a missed opportunity. Many studies have shown that one of the keys to living a happy and fulfilled life is gratitude. So, how can we develop a gratitude practice? And what are the advantages of being grateful? What is gratitude? Gratitude is the affirmation of goodness in the world, of the gifts and benefits we receive, and the recognition that the source of this goodness is outside of us. Gratitude allows us to: Celebrate the present. Handle toxic or negative emotions better. Be more resistant to stress. And have a higher sense of self-worth. .embed-container { position: relative; padding-bottom: 56.25%; height: 0; overflow: hidden; max-width: 100%; } .embed-container iframe, .embed-container object, .embed-container embed { position: absolute; top: 0; left: 0; width: 100%; height: 100%; } Gratitude practices and programs One of the leading researchers on gratitude is Robert Emmons. He's developed gratitude programs and practices that centre around: Keeping a gratitude journal of three or five things you're grateful for, and thereby developing a daily gratitude practice. Remembering the bad. To be grateful in the now, it helps to remember hardships you've overcome. Asking yourself three questions. “What have I received from __?”, “What have I given to __?”, and “What troubles and difficulty have I caused?” Learning prayers of gratitude, or looking for secular alternatives to express gratitude for existence on a regular basis. Coming to your senses. Appreciate everything you can see, smell, taste, and hear. Using visual reminders, to help you appreciate what you have. Making a vow to practice gratitude, which could be as simple as a piece of paper saying “I vow to count my blessings each day.” Minding your language. Use words like 'blessing', 'fortune', 'abundance', and so on. Focus on your speech on others instead of yourself. Going through the motions. Doing grateful actions will make you more grateful; smile, say thank you, and write letters of gratitude. Thinking outside the box. Look for new situations and circumstances to feel grateful. On a practical level, your gratitude practice can consist of many things, from writing a handwritten ‘thank you’-letter, to creating an appreciation calendar, saying “I’m grateful” for everything you touch on a given day, calling your parents or children and expressing your appreciation, sharing a positive post of gratitude on social media, or giving your time or money to a cause or charity. Good stuff: be grateful, feel better! What are the benefits of a gratitude practice? The benefits of gratitude practices range from physical benefits, like having a stronger immune system, lower blood pressure, and better sleep, to psychological benefits like higher levels of positivity, more alertness, joy, and pleasure, to social benefits like being more helpful, generous, compassionate, forgiving, and more connected. People who experience the most gratitude (and therefore the positive effects) tend to: Feel a sense of abundance in their lives. Appreciate the contributions of others to their well-being. Recognise and enjoy life's small pleasures. Acknowledge the importance of experiencing and expressing gratitude. In short, developing and maintaining gratitude practices radically transforms your outlook and experience of life. Practice gratitude on a regular basis, and start reaping these benefits for yourself! ● happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member yet? Sign up for free now to enjoy: ■ our happiness magazine with practical life tips ■ share and support in our happiness forum ■ self-develop with free online classes in our Academy Stress management | Mindfulness | Burnout Written by Arlo Laibowitz Arlo is a filmmaker, artist, lecturer, and intermittent practitioner of metta meditation and morning yoga. When not dreaming about impossible projects and making them happen in the most impractical ways possible, he journals, listens to jazz, or cuddles with his better half.

Fed up with the almost constant stream of bad news that seems to flow into your consciousness? If so, you're not alone. Read on to discover just a few of the brighter things that happened over the course of November 2017 in our positive news round-up from Ed Gould. 1. Dogs love human smiles Humans might be the only animals capable of smiling, but dogs can recognise the facial alteration in humans they know and, therefore, detect happiness. What's more, they respond positively. Research at the University of Helsinki has revealed that dogs seeing their owners smile will prevent them from feeling fear and improve their emotional well-being! The professor who led the study said that the effects of smiling promote dog-human communications no end. The key to the way in which dogs focus on their visual world, and see their owners smiling, is a hypothalamic neuropeptide oxytocin, which also affects the social behaviour of other mammals, including humans. Furry good news: canines can detect – and share – happiness in their owners 2. Origami inspires engineering breakthrough Scientists from Harvard University and the Massachusetts Institute of Technology have used techniques drawn from the ancient Japanese art of paper folding, origami, to develop new lightweight engineering techniques. Developing robot muscles and skeletons for limbs means needing a light, but stable structure and using paper folding methods has led to some remarkable results in the field of robotics. 3. Woman with Downs Syndrome breaks down barriers US beauty pageants may not be everyone's thing, perhaps because they seem to promote conformity to a particular look or lifestyle. However, one entrant to a pageant in Minnesota in November broke the mould because she entered even though she has Downs Syndrome. In a first for America, it turns out that Mikayla Holmgren was the first entrant in Miss USA to have any form of disability. Holmgren won Miss Minnesota Junior Miss Amazing in 2015 and is now set to continue her career. 4. Irish scientists offer hope to those with Parkinson's Disease A debilitating disease for those who have it and their loves ones, Parkinson's patients have been offered a ray of light thanks to work conducted at the National University of Ireland in Galway. Publishing their findings in the academic journal Scientific Reports, the team claimed that brain repair for people living with Parkinson’s can happen. Their method means replacing the dead brain cells they find and transplanting healthy ones in their place. In more positive news, Niamh Moriarty, a PhD student who has been working on the project, was recently given a highly competitive Travel Award from the Campaign for Alzheimer’s Research in Europe in recognition of her contribution. 5. New generation of insecticides will not harm bees Bee-friendly insecticides are being developed which will allow farmers to keep their crops safe from pests while protecting bees. Professor Ke Dong, an insect toxicologist at Michigan State University who co-authored a report into the new generation of insecticides, said that his team's observations “open the possibility” of designing a range of new methods of controlling insects which are pests whilst protecting those which are not, namely bees. Buzzing news: essential new insecticides are being developed which will not harm bees 6. Technology used to help reduce suicide risk The social media giant Facebook announced in November that it was starting to use artificial intelligence algorithms to detect whether a user might be at risk of suicide. Essentially, the algorithm it has put together identifies whether a user is showing signs of suicidal thoughts or might be considering self-harming. The idea is for Facebook to then step in, if necessary by alerting emergency services. According to the Times of India, the system is being rolled out from the US to other countries. 7. Research offers new hope to bald people Going bald can be a traumatic thing for both men and women, especially when there's little that can be done about it. However, new scientific work has led to a discovery that may bring some happiness back to those afflicted. A protein that is known to be responsible for hair loss in androgenetic alopecia, the most frequent form of baldness in adults, has been identified. By controlling the protein with a yet-to-be-developed therapy, it should be possible to treat this type of baldness in people in future. In the meantime, the research team has developed a treatment that has been shown to promote follicle growth among mice in the laboratory. 8. Firefighters perform a festive good turn When a man who was hanging up his Christmas lights fell from his ladder, the emergency services in his part of America needed to be called out. Unfortunately, the man in question had to be rescued and then hospitalised due to his injuries. However, the firefighters who came to the scene were not content with that and finished the job of arranging his festive lighting for him to come home to. Now that's real festive spirit! Let there be light: firefighters shared the Christmas spirit when they were called out to a man's home 9. Burns victims face improved recovery According to research undertaken in the UK, something as simple as a vitamin D pill could help untold numbers of people to recover from burns with less scarring. The study has shown that patients with higher levels of vitamin D in their body face fewer complications when they are recovering from a burn injury. Anything from major burns to a little sunburn will be less affected by permanent scarring if patients top up on their vitamin D intake, it's claimed. 10. Cancer modelling may lead to diminished numbers of animal tests The Institution of Engineering and Technology awarded a prize fund that will be used to create three dimensional engineered functional cancers, following a breakthrough in the technology. Professor Rui L Reis, who is based at the University of Minho in Portugal, won the prize to continue his modelling work which, it is hoped, will mean fewer animals are tested in medical laboratories when regenerative therapies need to be assessed. That has to be positive news for all animal lovers. ● Photos: Colourbox.com Written by Ed Gould Ed Gould is a UK-based journalist and freelance writer. He is a practitioner of Reiki.