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I don't know what to do about my friend, is it even worth it?


se****

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Hi everyone! I (25F) and my friend Sarah (25F) have been friends for 7 years, but took a 1 year break as we were both toxic to each other, she caused me anxiety, and boundaries were crossed. After our break, Sarah reached out to me to rekindle and we both talked about our past and how we can move forward. Since last year, we had become close and have not had any issues and were doing really well until last weekend. There was a misunderstanding while we were at a bar where she kept walking away from me after she snapped at me, and I reached out to her via text the day after explaining my side and acknowledging the parts that I did wrong (we had another friend who witnessed this and she said I wasn’t in the wrong but Sarah overreacted however I just wanted to move past this, therefore apologizing for any wrong doings). However, she does not want to take accountability into anything and blames me for how the night went, even though multiple times I said let’s just move past it. She has been invaliding my feelings, and now ignoring my texts after I have been trying to talk it out. 

 

The miscommunication/ misunderstanding:

I’ll try to condense it as much as possible. Sarah, my friend Jordan, and I were planning on going to the bars and she wanted to invite her client, which I was totally okay with. We were meeting up with another group of friends (only 2-3 times, still relatively new). At the first bar, it was just a lot of awkward small talk. We went to the second bar (not planned) and everyone was either getting drinks or the rest of the group was in line. My friend Jordan and I told Sarah that we might head to the other club since her client was still drinking and everyone can meet up after since they wanted to stay with the group. She told me I was acting “f***ing weird” and I said “it is a little awkward” and she walked away. When I tried to explain to her that it seems like everyone wants to do something different, she walked away again. She walked away 2-3 times that night. When I texted her the next day trying to clear everything up, she would bring up really irrelevant things and not talk about the point of the message. She has since not talked to me, so I am not sure what to do.

 

Any advice is appreciated, thank you!

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Maybe give Sarah some space again. It seems like she has difficulties navigating relationships and speaking her mind. Seems she dislikes conversations. Just give her some space. She’ll reach out again soon.
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I meant confrontation. Sorry. Auto correct.
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I meant confrontation. Sorry. Auto correct.
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The information you have provided seems that she has not let go off the past. My suggestion is give her time to process what she is feeling maybe she wasn't ready to rekindle as she thought she was or hasn't changed as well either. There's alot of information not given but best course is not to feed into her negative energy(wanting attention) as it is not healthy for you and herself as well.

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