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One seemingly simple question that most people wonder is: 'can we choose our happiness?'. Sonia Vadlamani explains how we can indeed cultivate happiness consciously by following the 10 keys to happiness. Sometimes it’s difficult for us to feel happy, be it because of the unrealistic standards of beauty and perfection we impose on ourselves, or the negativity we surround ourselves with. It could also be due to the fear of failure embedded deep within our subconscious, or our inability to form friendships and meaningful communities as we grow older. There are several unhelpful habits or tendencies we ingrain that can make us miserable and unhappy. Thankfully, researchers maintain that it’s possible to intervene and cultivate happiness through will and a proper framework. By following the 10 keys to happiness, you could maximize your potential for a lifetime full of joy and contentment. Happiness means different things to different people. The interesting news, however, is that our happiness is not set in stone. In her ground-breaking book The How of Happiness, researcher Sonja Lyubomirsky points out that while 50 per cent of our happiness is predetermined by our genetic makeup and personality traits, and 10 per cent of our personal happiness is determined by our circumstances and life experiences, about 40 per cent of our happiness can be chosen willfully by us, and depends largely on our daily actions. RELATED: Is happiness genetic? Here's what science says This goes to prove that while we cannot change our genes or predict the future, a significant portion of our happiness can be controlled by us. Unfortunately, our pursuit of happiness – as a society and on an individual level – can become very misguided. Indeed, technological advancements and the pursuit of materialism propagated by media messages may advocate happiness based on our material choices. Psychologist Barry Schwartz addresses this erroneous pursuit of happiness in his book The Paradox of Choice, wherein he points out that the plethora of choices we have available today due to surge in consumerism can do more harm than good, even resulting in conditions like anxiety and depression. The 10 keys to happiness: the ‘great dream’ “Happiness is not something ready-made. It comes from your own actions.”, articulates the Dalai Lama, who is also the patron of the charity Action for Happiness. While everyone’s idea of happiness may be different, Action for Happiness has identified 10 ‘keys’ to happiness, or practices that can consistently lead to a more fulfilling and happier life. While the first five keys to happiness described here refer to our interactions with the outside world (Great), the latter five keys to happiness describe the traits that originate within us and are determined by our attitude towards life (Dream). Outside: daily activities 1. Take care of your body There is an overwhelming amount of research that deems exercise a vital key to happiness and well-being. A Yale study conducted on over 1.2 million Americans concludes that exercise is more important for our mental health than money. You need not run a marathon to be healthy and happy – opt for an activity of your preference that suits your health goals and lifestyle. Indulge in mindful running, unplug from technology with periodic forest bathing, or simply swap escalator commutes with stairs. Keeping fit is one of the main keys to happiness shutterstock/Lordn Eating right can contribute towards better health and happiness too. A balanced diet consisting of whole grains, fresh vegetables and fruit, lean poultry and healthy fats can help you achieve your health goals faster. Opt for foods which promote gut health instead of processed or junk food options for improved mood, better metabolism and to keep disease at bay. 2. Practise mindfulness “We’re happiest when we focus on the present moment, and the least happy when the mind is wandering”, reveals researcher Matt Killingsworth. Mindfulness refers to being in a state of awareness and taking notice of the present intentionally and with complete acceptance. Studies show that practising mindfulness can help manage stress levels, in addition to activating the areas of our brains related to feeling good. Mindfulness can be developed using simple measures – start by paying attention to your feelings and thoughts as frequently throughout the day as possible. Meditation, mindful minute practices, and gratitude journaling can help in expanding awareness as well. RELATED: 7 mindfulness tips for staying engaged 3. Make learning a habit Research by Journal of Happiness Studies revealed that people who work on learning a new skill or honing an existing skill tend to experience greater happiness consistently. Interestingly, learning something new can be stressful and lower your happiness levels momentarily. However, the joy of acquiring or mastering a new skill can fulfill your need for autonomy or being self-directed, thus rewarding you with long-term happiness. “There is an overwhelming amount of research that deems exercise a vital key to happiness and well-being. A Yale study concluded that exercise is more important for our mental health than money.” Indeed, it’s important to find a suitable skill to master, or the right challenge to undertake that’ll allow you to push beyond your comfort zone yet enable you to find your flow state. Researchers also found that skills chosen by you offer better results in terms of improved self-esteem and a heightened sense of connection or ‘oneness’ with others. 4. Indulge in acts of kindness Random acts of kindness are not just beneficial for others – in fact, caring for others’ happiness activates the areas linked to trust, enjoyment and social connection in our brains as well. An experiment involving seven-day kindness activities concluded that kindness is a vital key to happiness, whether extended to people who are close to you, complete strangers or even yourself. Doing things for others can help alleviate social anxiety, improve your mood and prevent illness, thus enabling you to lead a healthy, meaningful life. 5. Make meaningful connections Human beings are social animals, and hence it’s hardly surprising when researchers found that forming meaningful connections and embracing community is one of the core values we associate with happiness. Indeed, the importance of a community as a key to happiness cannot be underestimated. In addition to the safety and support, we also derive the much-needed sense of togetherness and belonging when we find others who have the same values and interests as us. Meaningful friendships are essential for joy shutterstock/santypan Scientists agree that interacting with strangers, thus bolstering our ‘weak social ties’ also impacts our well-being positively. Take some time to connect with those who serve you coffee, your cab driver, or a friendly face you encounter during your daily strolls. Gestures like passing a casual compliment, wishing someone a good day, chatting with an elderly neighbor over a cuppa can make a world of difference to someone who’s been feeling down or struggling with loneliness. Inside: Developing the right attitude 6. Be at ease with who you are Self-acceptance forms an important cornerstone for our mental health and well-being, yet it’s a routine that we tend to practice the least, as revealed in a survey conducted by Action For Happiness. While acceptance was rated as the strongest predictor of life satisfaction and happiness amidst all the other traits and habits, only 5% of the respondents admitted to being kind to themselves and believed that they were perfect the way they were. RELATED: 12 ways to practise self-acceptance Practising acceptance as a habit can be difficult at first, but it’s possible to be good to yourself by shifting your perspective. Indeed, embracing imperfections as your unique traits and acknowledging your strengths –however insignificant they seem – can be a crucial key to happiness. 7. Set vital goals Happiness doesn’t happen spontaneously – it requires planning and action towards pursuing things that matter to us. Goal setting is an important key to happiness, since it forms the outline for the life you envision for yourself. It’s important to set goals to look forward to – not only can proactive goal setting ensure fulfilment of your life ambitions and vision, following an actionable plan and achieving timebound targets using SMART goal setting can boost self-confidence and eliminate stress and anxiety. 8. Develop resilience All of us may have faced hardships, loss and trauma along our way, and since our brains are wired for negativity bias, we tend to remember the adverse events in our lives as compared to the positive experiences. However, by changing our perspective and looking at hardships as stepping stones towards personal growth and success, we can learn to take back power every time we feel defeated by life. Indeed, building resilience can boost positive thinking, strengthen connections, and improve stress management skills. “The importance of a community as a key to happiness cannot be underestimated. In addition to the safety and support, we also derive the much-needed sense of togetherness and belonging.” In fact, researcher Dr Ann Masten describes resilience as ‘ordinary magic’ derived from everyday situations and resources, that helps us adapt better during hardships. There is surmounting scientific evidence that developing resilience as a life skill and finding ways to bounce back from adversities can contribute immensely to our well-being and happiness. 9. Cultivate a positive outlook “Just as water lilies retract when sunlight fades, so do our minds when positivity fades”, states researcher Barbara Fredrickson in her book Positivity. Indeed, research suggests that experiencing ‘upward spirals of positive emotions’ like gratitude, joy, interest etc. more often allows us to counteract the downward spirals of negative emotions like stress, jealousy etc. Gratitude journaling, smiling more often, finding ways to incorporate awe into your life are some easy ways to boost positivity. Learning a new skill can be fulfilling shutterstock/Syda Productions 10. Find meaning in your life Feeling connected to something larger than ourselves or possessing a sense of purpose in life is linked with greater life satisfaction, improved self-esteem, lasting relationships, and a more optimistic attitude. Leading a meaningful life could seem like a complicated process, but you can begin by prioritizing activities that bring you joy and a strong sense of purpose, like volunteering, networking for a cause, or trying to make a difference in others’ lives. The key to happiness here is to understand where your calling lies and set out to follow your bliss. ‘Life Crafting’, or the process of reflecting on your strengths and interests, and aligning them with your vision, passion and desires, can be used as the framework for setting goals conducive to the meaningful life you wish to lead. Round-up: 10 keys to happiness “It is work to be happy”, says psychologist Barry Schwartz. Indeed, there’s more to happiness than feeling good about pleasurable things, but the good news is that it can be cultivated by consistently encouraging the 10 keys to happiness or happy habits listed above into our lives. Instead of trying to implement all the keys to happiness at once, try reflecting on what each individual key means for you, and devise ways to implement them using simple action plan, to be able to lead a rewarding and happier life. happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member yet? Sign up for free now to enjoy: ■ our happiness magazine with practical life tips ■ share and support in our happiness forum ■ self-develop with free online classes in our Academy Life purpose | Motivation | Positive psychology Written by Sonia Vadlamani Fitness and healthy food blogger, food photographer and stylist, travel-addict and future self journaler. Sonia loves to write and has resolved to dedicate her life to revealing how easy and important it is to be happier, stronger and fitter each day. Follow her daily pursuits at FitFoodieDiary or on Instagram.

Feeling connected to others in a world that's increasingly individualistic may seem challenging, but as Dee Marques explains, there are some simple intimacy exercises you can use to develop stronger bonds, deepen connections, and improve the quality of your relationships. There's little doubt that humans are social beings. Feeling close to others contributes to our overall feelings of happiness and fulfillment. Indeed, there are plenty of studies that confirm this from a scientific point of view. In fact, scientists believe our brains are hardwired to be social and that our development as a species relied on our ability to maintain strong bonds. But although we live surrounded by people, loneliness and isolation are still some of the biggest social challenges of the 21st century. Indeed, researchers have noted that one can have a wide social network and interact regularly with others and still feel lonely or disconnected. This suggests that intimacy is a key factor in the development of meaningful connections with others. So, here are five easy intimacy exercises that can help deepen the connection you have with your partner and all the other important people in your life. 1. Meditation Meditation is a fabulous tool that can help you achieve greater awareness and connection with the world that surrounds us. Several studies have found that regular meditation practice has a positive effect on close relationships and helps develop a stronger sense of intimacy. According to these studies, there are several reasons why meditation works: first of all, meditation makes us more accepting of our own flaws, so we can easily become more forgiving of others. Secondly, meditation improves our ability to separate thoughts from emotions and makes us less 'reactive', so we can continue working on developing closeness, despite ups and downs in our relationships. Meditation helps deepen connections with others Shou-yi is a lesser-known form of meditation that comes from the Taoist tradition. The name itself means “to embrace the one”, so it's easy to see why this intimacy exercise can help deepen a connection with others. Shou-yi brings to the forefront of your mind the fact that in one way or another, we are all interconnected and interdependent. This technique is also known as “quiet sitting” and involves contemplative meditation based on Taoist philosophy: Sit down with your back straight Visualise the five 'yin organs', or bodily parts where energy resides: the liver, heart, spleen, lungs and kidneys. This could be compared to a body scan meditation, where you focus on one body part at the time Each yin organ has a colour associated to it. Liver is azure, the heart is a vivid red, the spleen is yellow, lungs are white and kidneys are dark blue. Focus on the relevant colour as you move through each body part According to Taoist scriptures, these colours also correspond to the five elements: wood (azure), fire (red), earth (yellow), metal (white) and water (dark blue) Visualize the flow between body parts, colours and elements The goal of this technique is to achieve a deep insight into oneness and bring a deep sense of harmony between humans, the earth and the cosmos. Once you are in the 'oneness mindset', it becomes easier to look at the forest instead of getting distracted by the trees (other people’s habits and traits that bother us). After all, there is a reason why Taoist philosophy has been used for peacebuilding and conflict management purposes. 2. Loving-kindness meditation A second intimacy exercise to help deepen connection is loving-kindness meditation (LKM). The ultimate goal of LKM is to strengthen compassion, love and appreciation for other beings, so it's an ideal technique to improve intimacy. RELATED: How to improve intimacy – 9 techniques to try A study of people who practised loving-kindness meditation for six weeks showed a reduction in the negativity levels of their relationships. Furthermore, participants reported having a stronger support network and felt increased happiness. The technique is also simple: Find a quiet space and choose a comfortable position Create a mantra, which should include good wishes towards others (for example: "May I be happy, healthy and free from harm. May you be happy, healthy and free from harm") Repeat the mantra in six stages: first direct it towards yourself, next towards someone who has had a positive effect in your life, then towards a relative or friend, next towards someone you feel neutral or have an occasional conflict with, then towards someone you dislike, and lastly, towards all beings While you repeat the mantra, picture those good wishes physically going from you to other people Here's another example of a loving kindness meditation by Jack Kornfield 3. Gratitude The third exercise is writing gratitude letters. Letting people know we value them and care for them can improve our relationship with others, since we become more likely to overlook people’s flaws, lessening any chance of conflict and helping us achieve a better appreciation of other people’s value. Gratitude letters can deepen connection because our feelings of gratitude are directly shown to the other person. This intimacy exercise has a strong impact on the quality of the relationship, as well as a lasting effect that can span several weeks, as shown by studies at the University of Pennsylvania. Even if you don't send the letter, putting your gratitude in writing makes you more aware of your positive emotions and is bound to make you feel closer to others. “Writing gratitude letters as an intimacy exercise can deepen connection because our feelings of gratitude are directly shown to the other person.” Gratitude letters work because when we direct our attention to gratefulness, we automatically divert it from toxic or negative emotions. And as some researchers have found, the benefits multiply over time, since cultivating an ongoing gratitude practice causes changes in brain activity in areas related to decision-making, meaning that there is a link between gratitude feelings and how we act towards others. Say thanks: gratitude letters are a great intimacy exercise 4. Getting to know you exercise The fourth method on deepening connections is a 36-question exercise that you can use to understand others better and get a better picture of who they truly are. For this intimacy exercise, you'll need to set at least 45 minutes aside and take turns asking the questions that you can find here. RELATED: 6 types of intimacy and how to cultivate them Research at US universities has shown that this exercise is effective in helping deepen connection and closeness between people. This is because the exercise relies on mutual self-disclosure as opposed to small talk. Furthermore, it requires both sides to open up, providing a safe environment where there's no fear of feeling vulnerable or one-sided. 5. Mindful listening Devoting time to properly listening to others (instead of simply exchanging views or acknowledging information) is one of the best ways of showing we care for them. Mindful listening is an intimacy exercise that can also help increase empathy, because in doing so we get to understand better other people’s motives, needs and fears, gaining a more accurate picture of who they are as human beings. “Meditation practice has a positive effect on close relationships and helps develop a stronger sense of intimacy.” So, next time you have a conversation with a partner or friend, focus on what they're saying without judging or interrupting, and do your best to be present in the moment, being supportive and receptive. It's also useful to have some guidelines in mind: Suspend assumptions Suspend judgement Suspend status (communicate on an equal-to-equal basis) Honour confidentiality Honour silence Deep listening works because by not being judgmental and overlooking differences in opinion, others feel more inclined to trust us. Overall, mindful listening improves the quality of our relationships and sets a solid foundation for authentic interpersonal encounters. Listen and learn: deep listening equals deeper connections The benefits of deeper intimacy We live in a society that's increasingly individualistic, so it's always good to remember the benefits of crafting a deeper connection with others and of cultivating intimacy in relationships. The benefits are both physical and emotional: being able to connect with others at a deeper level generates empathy, which has been proven to give a sense of purpose and to strengthen the immune system. Other studies show that stronger connectedness with others is a key component of our support system, can lower stress and anxiety levels, and has been linked to lower heart disease rates. Of course, lasting closeness, intimacy and loyalty will not come automatically. There is no magic pill when it comes to deepening your connection with others, but the five intimacy exercises we have discussed here are a good starting point that can help your enjoy richer and more meaningful relationships. ● happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member yet? Sign up for free now to: ■ enjoy our happiness magazine with practical life tips ■ share and support in our happiness forum ■ self-develop with free online classes in our Academy Relationship advice | Communication skills | Learning Written by Dee Marques A social sciences graduate with a keen interest in languages, communication, and personal development strategies. Dee loves exercising, being out in nature, and discovering warm and sunny places where she can escape the winter.

The monotony of life can have us struggling with boredom. But it doesn't have to be this way! From changing your commute to trying new food, Dee Marques suggests 8 simple and science-backed ideas for shaking things up when you feel like has got stale. Why do we feel bored with life? Isn’t it a conundrum that we so often need a solid routine to feel settled, but once we get there, it doesn’t take long for boredom and fatigue to set in? Another contradiction that has become evident during the past year is that even though we may have more time than ever (especially if working from home), it’s also hard to find things to fill that extra time. Furthermore, even more contradictory is the fact that we now have a wealth of entertainment options at our fingertips. Indeed, digital technology has opened up a whole new world of things to do and learn, yet many people are still bored with life and don’t make the most of all that’s available. Life can be long and can be repetitive, but it’s also short and it would be a pity if we spent it being bored and demotivated. In this article I’d like to share some strategies I use whenever I feel bored with life. Exploring boredom
 We all feel demotivated and bored every now and then, and that’s natural. The cyclical nature of boredom is due to a process called hedonic adaptation. As humans, we have the ability to adapt to change, whether change involves positive or negative experiences. In some ways, this ability has guaranteed our survival as a species, but hedonic adaptation comes with a downside: once we get used to something, it no longer offers a challenge and we become apathetic. Although hedonic adaptation is a natural process, sometimes being bored with life can be problematic. Indeed, researchers have found links between boredom, substance abuse and mood disorders. It’s not that being bored with life can cause all of this, but it can aggravate tendencies or existing problems. For example, boredom can make people with depressive tendencies spiral into negative thoughts and feelings of worthlessness. In other people, feeling bored with life can trigger high-risk or destructive behaviours (like substance abuse or gambling, etc.) just to get a thrill. Bored with life? It's time to find meaning shutterstock/garretsworkshop Moreover, there’s a difference between being bored with life and being tired of life. The latter is what psychologists call existential boredom, a state in which nothing matters or sparks joy. You could picture it as a chronic feeling of being bored with life. The problem with being with tired of life is that it’s dangerously similar to depression. People affected by existential boredom have deep feelings of inadequacy and believe that life is passing them by without them achieving anything meaningful. RELATED: How to find meaning in life – 7 strategies The trick to avoiding this is knowing how to handle hedonic adaption. When apathy sets in, don’t let it take over. Look at it this way: being bored with life is another way the inner self has of asking, “is this all there is to it?”. In other words, a bored inner self is in urgent need of new challenges that bring joy and meaning to life. So, if the rot has set in, here are some ideas to shake things up a little when the monotony and routine of life is getting you down. Bored with life? 8 ideas to shake things up 1. Do something different – every day Novelty is the spice of life, but don’t just wait until you wake up to decide how novelty will look on that particular day. If you leave it to chance, it will never happen! Plan in advance and make a list of new things to try every day of the week. Coming up with ideas may be hard at first if you’re stuck in a rut. What I do is break the day down into different sections. For example, section 1 is “early morning” or “waking up”. Here you could choose to wake up earlier so you can watch the sun rise, start with a new morning meditation routine, or even stay in bed for longer if you’re usually an early bird! 2. Change your commute Seeing the same old sights every day at the same time of the day can be mentally exhausting. The good news is that there’s usually more than one way to get to the same place, so try a new route. If possible, walk, cycle or take the bus to work. It’s amazing how much more receptive we are to our surroundings when we’re not behind the wheel. new parks, green spaces “When apathy sets in, don’t let it take over. Look at it this way: being bored with life is another way the inner self has of asking 'is this all there is to it?'” Aside from helping to shake off your boredom, taking new routes to our workplaces or schools is scientifically-proven to boost your brain. When we try new routes and see new things, we activate the cortex, the part of the brain responsible for information processing. We also stimulate the hippocampus, the part of our brain that stores memory. At one point in his life, Microsoft founder Bill Gates took a new route home each day to stimulate his brain – and look what he achieved! And, if you're working from home, try working from a new place such as a café or co-working space every now and then. If you can’t, change the layout or décor of your home office (if you're lucky enough to have one!). 3. Find purpose in your work Talking of work, what we do for our living is a key component of finding motivation and keeping boredom at bay. Most of us spend eight or so hours a day working, so if you find your job monotonous and unchallenging, it’s easy to become bored with life. If your current role doesn’t bring meaning or purpose, it’s time to start thinking about a new career. Volunteering in your spare time is a way to explore options that may stimulate you without having to quit your current job. And if you can’t change jobs, try to come up with imaginative ways of doing what you already do – you can find 10 suggestions here. 4. Learn something new One of the most exciting things about life is that we all have the chance to never stop learning new things. Indeed, there are always new skills to learn and practise. If you're feeling bored, sign up for a new class, whether it’s something related to a new career path or something creative that can help you discover new talents. It could also be a new workout routine. Exercise is a proven mood booster, and there are so many options to try that it can take months or years to get bored. Personally, I’m a huge kickboxing and martial arts fan, but when I get bored of the same old routine I mix it up with dancing lessons. I’m terrible at it (!), but it doesn’t matter as long as it helps me snap out of that tired-of-life feeling. Turn off the TV and start a new course! 5. Do something for someone else Sometimes, focusing our attention on others is the best way to forget about our own troubles. If you’re bored with life, take interest in someone else’s life. Helping others creates a feeling of purpose, since we know we’re doing something useful, which is central to life satisfaction. So keep your eyes open for signs of people who may need help and think about how you can be useful to others. As a bonus, this will either help you make new friends or create deeper bonds with existing ones. 6. Try new food I recently came across a study on how important novelty is in fighting the feeling of being bored with life. The study looked at the effect of eating popcorn with chopsticks instead of with bare hands (how’s that for a non-boring challenge?) and found that it helped bring more enjoyment and grounding in the present and enjoyment. Even something as simple as finding exotic spices and preparing a new dish can help. 7. Become more mindful A professor at a Canadian University said that “mindfulness is accepting the present moment as it is, whereas boredom is the antithesis of that”. Of course, when when we’re bored with life, the last thing we want to do is think about how bored we are right there and then. But if done with the right intention, an inward and mindful look into our feelings can help. Looking for a place to start? Go through the questions listed in this practise exercise. 8. Cut down on screen time Social media and video games are meant to entertain us, but the problem with new technologies is that they’re designed to deliver instant gratification. Once that’s achieved, we’re on a wild goose chase to find something else that’s new and exciting. “One of the most exciting things about life is that we all have the chance to never stop learning new things. If you're feeling bored, sign up for a new class.” The mechanism behind instant gratification activates certain neural pathways in the brain that are similar to those found in addictive behaviour, which is why some people find it so hard to “disconnect” from the online world. However, digital entertainment doesn’t necessarily help fight boredom. In fact, it spending too much time on it may get in the way of trying some of the ideas suggested above that would make you feel less bored with life. So, either cut down on screen time, or choose carefully the content you consume instead of scrolling mindlessly. For example, instead of allowing the YouTube “black hole” to suck you in, only use the platform to watch videos related to new things you’re learning, as per point #4 above. Conclusion: escaping boredom Straddling the fine line between routine and monotony takes practise and determination, but the pay off is well worth it: you’ll be able to bring new experiences and variety into your life and discover new passions. So, if you’re currently feeling bored with life, don’t wait for the world to entertain you. Take active steps to find meaning and joy by using the ideas I've shared with you here. • Main image: shutterstock/shift drive happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practice, share Are you a happiness.com member yet? Sign up for free now to: ■ enjoy our happiness magazine with practical life tips ■ share and support others in our happiness forum ■ learn with free online classes in our happiness Academy Gratitude | Work life balance | Coaching Written by Dee Marques A social sciences graduate with a keen interest in languages, communication, and personal development strategies. Dee loves exercising, being out in nature, and discovering warm and sunny places where she can escape the winter.

Slowing down helped Radha Ruparell figure out what really mattered to her. On April 5, 2020, I started to feel tired in the middle of the day. A couple of days later, I found myself trying to catch my breath on a conference call. It was then that I first suspected I might have this new virus that everyone was talking about, COVID-19. Six months later, I am still in the battle. The first few weeks of this illness were a rollercoaster. In the early days, I felt like I had been drugged with sleeping pills and couldn’t even muster energy to get out of bed. At nights, I faced explosive headaches and fevers that brought haunting hallucinations. I would fall asleep for a couple of hours, often to be jolted awake gasping for air. Unable to hold down food, I shed ten pounds in a month. Soon my symptoms progressed to a point where I was truly scared for my life. I went to doctors looking for answers, but even they were uncertain. My heart sank when, after discovering a lesion in my brain, a neurologist told me: “I’m sorry. We can try some things and see if they work, but we just don’t know enough yet.” Fortunately, I made it through those harrowing first weeks. Yet in the weeks that followed, I discovered that I had become a “long-hauler” facing a long-lasting post-viral syndrome. Months later, I still face waves of fatigue where my body shuts down if I don’t get enough rest. Prior to this virus, I was healthy in mind and body. I meditated, surfed, played tennis, and walked around Manhattan with a New Yorker’s hurried gait. I lived a fast-paced life. And then COVID-19 hit me. Now, I have been forced to slow down. Slowing down has been tough — and it has also been an incredible gift. Noticing what’s right there In the early part of this illness, I was in isolation alone at home. With constant physical pain, fatigue and brain fog, I was unable to work. I didn’t have energy to do anything else, either. I could not read, watch TV, exercise, or do other normal activities. Sitting in isolation with zero distraction was unnerving because then I had no choice other than to really be with everything that was unfolding. As I lay bedridden, I found myself reflecting on my life, pondering not what I had accomplished but who I had been along the way. Had I been kind to my family and friends? Had I taken full responsibility for my mistakes? Had I expressed myself fully and let the world see who I really am? Slowing down helps you focus on what really matters (posed by model) shutterstock/insta_photos On day 14, I finally broke down and admitted to a friend that I had never been more scared in my life. For two weeks, I had been resisting my fear. My fear of dying. My fear of losing loved ones to this illness. But finally, when I was able to let go and just be with that fear, suddenly it wasn’t as terrifying anymore. My friend couldn’t take away my pain, but she created a safe space for me to share what I was feeling. Sometimes, all we need in difficult times is to be witnessed and heard. I also discovered that when I started slowing down and allowing myself to embrace all my emotions, it wasn’t just fear, angst, or sadness that arose. I started opening up my heart in new ways to love, connection, and all the beauty that surrounded me. As one example, seven weeks into my fight, I celebrated my 40th birthday. On paper, that day might have sounded like a disaster. There was no big celebration. And yet, it was the most beautiful birthday ever. As I received warm notes from friends and family around the world, something amazing happened. Instead of the day whizzing by, as it usually does, I was able to really sit with all the love that was pouring in. I soaked it all in. It was a deeply moving experience. “Sitting in isolation with zero distraction was unnerving because then I had no choice other than to really be with everything that was unfolding.” Slowing down also helped me rediscover things I had taken for granted. When I left my apartment after 27 days in isolation, the first thing I noticed were the beautiful tulips growing in a little patch outside of my building. I have lived in this apartment for five years. Why had I never really noticed these flowers before in springtime? Oh, and the feeling of a breath of fresh air, a gust of wind, and the first time seeing trees again after a month indoors. It was as if I were a kid experiencing these things for the first time. What would life feel like if we always approached the world with childlike wonder? What if we soaked in the magic of each moment like it was our first and last one on earth? Instead of taking these simple pleasures for granted, what if we were truly present in our lives? This might sound sappy, but learning to savor and appreciate good experiences in life is one of the most important keys to well-being. And it gives us more energy and strength to face the difficult experiences. But busyness has become a normal way of life. In fact, we often wear it as a badge of honor. We are so busy running on autopilot, often in triggered states, that we can easily miss what’s right in front of us. We miss the magic that exists simply in taking a walk outside or sharing a meal with loved ones. Slowing down helped me pause and notice. I am now so much more aware of what’s been right in front of me all along. Unlearning bad habits Slowing down didn’t just help me savor the little things in life. It also forced me to recognize the importance of rest. In battling post-viral fatigue syndrome, I learned that if I didn’t pause and rest regularly, I would quickly relapse. So, when I returned to work, I had to learn entirely new ways of operating. I had to say no to meetings and projects that I would have otherwise taken on. I had to rest in the middle of the day to avoid waves of pain and fatigue from escalating. I had to learn that while I was brimming with ambition around things I wanted to accomplish, not everything had to get done that day. And, mostly, I had to learn to let go of any guilt associated with operating slowly, because the guilt just made the mental and physical pain worse. On my fridge, I put a Post-it note — “Be gentle with yourself” — as a daily reminder to practice self-compassion. Soon I discovered that when I was kind and respectful to myself, I was also much more grounded and generous in my interactions with others around me. For example, when a coworker showed up stressed to a meeting one day, I reminded myself that “just like me, they, too, are dealing with difficult things.” Rather than getting triggered and adding to the stress, I tried to listen without judgment. In these times of collective trauma, we all deserve a bit of compassion. There’s a myth that self-compassion means letting yourself off the hook. But, as I experienced, practicing self-compassion actually makes you more motivated to improve and resilient to setbacks — without the procrastination, stress, and rumination we get from being self-critical. Take time to appreciate friendships shuttertsock/rawpixel.com Slowing down is hard for so many of us “achievers” because our default norms are set otherwise. Initially, I tried to power through the fatigue and pain. But for the first time in my life, that strategy did not work. What I discovered about slowing down is that it’s not really about learning a new skill; rather, it’s about unlearning. When our routines are turned upside down, it can be daunting, that’s for sure. Yet disruptive moments like the pandemic are also a perfect time to break free of default ways of being. We can start questioning the things we do on autopilot and focus on what really matters. For me, I realized that what really matters is connection — from family to close friends to communities where I feel belonging. I have a newfound desire to be more intentional and fully present in all these interactions. What a shame it would be to come to the end of our lives and discover that we missed appreciating the “little things” that feel so ordinary at times — like a daily embrace with a child or partner — to later realize that these actually were the “big things” after all. Time for a collective pause When we slow down collectively, we create space to connect with one another more deeply. As the pandemic unfolded across the world, I first experienced it at my workplace, Teach For All, a global network of organizations in 58 countries working to develop collective leadership so that all children have the opportunity to fulfill their potential. In the early days of the pandemic, we hosted Zoom video calls where colleagues from around the world would get together. At the beginning of these calls, we would take a few minutes to check in with one another personally in small groups. In these moments, I learned that some colleagues had family members afflicted with COVID-19. Others were struggling with working from home while parenting young children. Many were facing the daunting challenge of reimagining education in their countries in the wake of indefinite school closures. These precious spaces to pause and be with one another were a chance to bear witness to each other’s raw realities. “I discovered that when I started slowing down and allowing myself to embrace all my emotions, it wasn’t just fear, angst, or sadness that arose. I started opening up my heart in new ways to love, connection, and all the beauty that surrounded me.” In these moments, we also discovered our deep interconnectedness. While the exact nature of our challenges differed, what we had in common was that all of us faced some upheaval and uncertainty, and that meant that we could also learn from one another. For example, soon after the pandemic unfolded, hundreds of teachers in communities around the world with limited internet access came together on a WhatsApp group (now known as the Teaching Without Internet Alliance) to share ideas for how to support student learning during school closures. Slowing down also created an opportunity to pause and ask the bigger questions. Many nights, as I was lying ill in bed, I would hear chants of “Black Lives Matter” as protestors marched down my street. As I listened, so many questions emerged: “Why is it that we have been quiet as a society for so long to the horrible treatment of our fellow human beings? In what ways have I been complicit through my silence and inaction? And what is possible now that more people are waking up?” While these questions have been alive in certain communities for a long time, without a collective slowdown, we might not have reached this tipping point where the conversation has finally permeated more broadly. Other questions that occupy my mind are around education. As more parents now get involved in their kids’ education, and as teachers reimagine remote learning, I wonder: “What is the purpose of education? What is most important for kids to learn? How do we nurture curiosity, compassion, and consciousness in kids? How can we use this moment to reimagine education to enable more equitable outcomes for all kids?” Similar reckonings may be happening in other fields around the world, from health care to food systems to our workplaces. As this global pandemic touches everyone, we have a unique opportunity to pause, connect with ourselves and one another, and ask the questions that really matter. And in this wide open space, perhaps we might unlock our imagination and collective responsibility and find new ways to tackle our greatest societal challenges. I have (un)learned so much personally by slowing down. Now, I wonder, what would be possible for humanity if we all slow down just a little? If we purposefully choose not to return to our hectic lives as if nothing happened? What beauty, connection, meaning, and joy might we find waiting for us right there in plain sight? • happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member yet? Sign up free to: ■ enjoy our happiness magazine with practical life tips ■ share and support others in our happiness forum ■ self-develop with free online classes in our happiness Academy Resilience | Kindness | Courage Written by Greater Good Science Center This article originally appeared on Greater Good, the online magazine of the Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkeley. Happiness.com is honoured to republish it with the kind permission of the Greater Good Science Center. greatergood.berkeley.edu

When you're feeling lonely it can be easy to sit around feeling sorry for yourself. Instead, try one of these 11 ideas from Calvin Holbrook to relieve the pain of loneliness and isolation. Loneliness sucks. I've been there and maybe you have too: stuck alone at home wishing you were out having fun with friends. Instead, for whatever reason, you're inside feeling lonely and wondering how and why you ended up in that position. However, feeling lonely isn't your fault and can often be a result of life circumstances: perhaps you've just moved to a new town/city and are struggling to make new friends. Maybe you've just come out of a relationship – or all your friends are suddenly getting into relationships. Or perhaps you've been struggling with depression or anxiety and can't face seeing your social network right now. Whatever the reason, science says that feeling alone for long periods of time is bad for your mental – and physical – health. In fact, studies show that a lack of social connections could be as harmful to our health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day. The same research suggests that loneliness increases the likelihood of mortality by a staggering 26 per cent. So, friendships can be powerful tools for staying well and healthy. But not all of us have a large circle of buddies. In the UK, 1.9 million older people often feel ignored or invisible. But contrary to popular opinion, it's not just the elderly that have feelings of loneliness: over 40 per cent of Britons say the TV or a pet is their main source of company. Similarly, in the US, nearly half of all Americans claim to feel lonely. Indeed, social isolation can touch us at any age, and can be affected by our personality, motivation and physical location. Feeling lonely? Here's what you can do Developed countries are clearly going through a loneliness epidemic. So, what can you do if you are one of those affected? Well, there are plenty of ways you can make new friends as an adult, such as joining social groups or developing bonds with colleagues, but if you're feeling lonely at home right now and are seeking ways to cope with negative feelings, here are 11 practical ideas to help you feel better and combat the pain of loneliness. 1. Welcome an old friend: loneliness First of all, even though it may not be welcome, treat loneliness as an old friend that’s just popped by for a visit. That's because resisting loneliness only makes it worse, so accept how you feel in this moment. Do not blame yourself. Instead of fighting against lonely feelings, accept these painful emotions into your heart with self-compassion and it will help ease the pain a little. Accept your loneliness and make friends with it. 2. Get creative If you're feeling lonely it can be easy to start ruminating over how you’re in that position and whether you could have done things differently to avoid it. Getting creative is a simple and fun way to take your mind off of your thoughts and engaged in something more productive. You could try mandala coloring, making a collage out of magazines, drawing, or writing, for example. Being creative will keep your mind busy and provide you with a sense of satisfaction and achievement. Colour your life when you're feeling lonely © shutterstock/Serhii Krot 3. Write a gratitude journal Accept your feelings of loneliness and instead of dwelling on them, shift your consciousness to all the great things in your life that you're grateful for. Take ten minutes to write everything down in a gratitude journal. Journals help us to know ourselves better by clarifying our thoughts, emotions and feelings. In fact, a 2015 study published in Europe’s Journal of Psychology suggested that practising gratitude may help decrease feelings of loneliness, and, in turn, possibly improve our health, well-being and happiness. 4. Give your brain a puzzle Use your alone time positively to boost your brainpower by doing a jigsaw or crossword. When solving a jigsaw, we must look at different pieces to figure out where they fit within the larger picture. Doing this improves our visual-spatial reasoning. As well as helping to relieve loneliness, studies show that doing puzzles can help delay the symptoms of dementia and Alzheimer’s disease. Completing a jigsaw also reduces stress by occupying and engaging the mind to create a sense of calm. As a puzzle is pieced together, external worries and stress decrease as the mind focuses on a task that is both meditative and satisfying. “Whatever the reason, science says that feeling alone for long periods of time is bad for your mental – and physical – health.” 5. Get out of the house Unless you’re keeping occupied with some of the loneliness-busting tips above, staying inside alone will only mean you concentrate more on those feelings of isolation. Simply going outside for a walk outside changes your environment and thoughts. Take a stroll and practise mindfulness, taking in all that is around you: the smells, sounds and sights. Or, try something cultural: pop to an exhibition or treat yourself to a film and get engrossed in something other than loneliness: see it as a personal date night! Alternatively, if you have green space nearby, have a walk in a park or do some forest bathing – the benefits of connecting with nature are proven by science. If you're feeling alone, take a mindful walk in nature 6. Get active Doing physical exercise is a great way to take your mind off your situation if your feelings of loneliness are taking over. Instead of mulling over things inside, head outside for a jog or run and boost your happiness hormones. Better still, head to the gym and try a new group class – you're more likely to strike up a conversation with someone. And if you do find yourself chatting with someone new and hit it off, don’t be afraid to ask for their number or ask them to go for a coffee together. You never know; they may be feeling just as lonely as you. 7. Sing out loud Singing is another proven way to fight the feeling of being alone, so blast out some of your favourite tracks and get those vocal chords warmed up. In fact, singing is a natural anti-depressant as it’s known to release mood-boosting endorphins. It's also been shown to boost our immune system, reduce stress levels and, according to a report published in the Journal of Music Therapy in 2004, help patients cope with chronic pain. Joining a choir is a great way to reap the benefits of singing and combat feelings of loneliness as you meet many new people at once. The Community of Voices research study (2012–2018) found that singing in a community choir for six months reduced the participants’ feelings of loneliness and also increased their interest in life. Singing in a choir can combat loneliness © shutterstock/Monkey Business Images 8. Share your skills with others Getting involved as a volunteer is a fantastic practical way to reduce feelings of loneliness. Volunteering for at least two hours a week may go a long way toward helping to ease feelings of loneliness and isolation, according to research published in Journals of Gerontology: Social Sciences. Volunteering almost always involves interacting with others, hence helping to build social connections and reduce isolation. In fact, the benefits of volunteering are many. If you're feeling alone, think about possible volunteering ideas and start researching what you can do in your local community. RELATED: Why is volunteering important? 9. Check in with yourself It’s OK to feel alone sometimes. Remind yourself that life isn't always fun and games and that there are plenty of ups and downs. Indeed, your circumstances will not always be the same and nothing last for ever – good or bad. Try to be patient with your loneliness, and with time and effort, it will ease. Remember that tomorrow is a new day when you can consider working on alleviating your loneliness and making new friends – if you're ready. 10. Consider getting a pet If you have the space and time, think about welcoming a pet into your home. The companionship that a pet offers is scientifically-proven to reduce loneliness, anxiety and stress, whether it’s a cat, bird, gerbil or iguana. However, dogs are the clear winners when it come to loneliness-busting pets: they force you to get out of the house and connect with other dog-loving humans. The healing power of pets is real. Animals, especially dogs, help to relieve loneliness 11. Use compassionate visualization As I wrote at the start of this article, perhaps you're feeling lonely while other friends are having fun while you're left alone. You could even feel jealous and envious of these people who are sharing good times together and seemingly not living with loneliness. Perhaps you weren't invited to a party or group holiday and feel upset about it. However, instead of carrying negative thoughts about those involved, show compassion. Try to visualize them at whatever event it may be and feel happy for them regardless. Feeling happy for others despite your sorrow can be healing and actually make you feel happier too. ● Main image: shutterstock/Antonio Guillem How do you deal with feeling of loneliness? Do you have any other ideas to add to the list? I'd love to read your suggestions below! Head over to the Forum to share more ideas on combating loneliness. Written by Calvin Holbrook Calvin edits the happiness magazine, as well being an artist and travel lover. He also enjoys hiking, nature, swimming, yoga, sweaty dancing, and all things vintage!

Like most of us, Dee Marques spent more time inside at home in 2020. It gave her the opportunity to discover the power of pottering – leisurely carrying out small tasks and activities without pressure. Here she shares the benefits it can bring to you... This year’s lockdowns have seen many of us spending time indoors and trying to keep ourselves entertained at home. This can be a challenge for those who are used to an active or outdoorsy lifestyle spent in nature, as it can be tough to find meaningful things to do. I struggled with this too, until a friend said she kept herself occupied by simply pottering around her house most of the day. I tried it, and found it too rewarding to keep it all to myself! What exactly is pottering? Pottering around is all about keeping busy at a leisurely pace, without feeling the need to have specific plans for things that need to be achieved. It’s about letting your eyes wander and finding things that could be done, instead of having a pre-planned list of tasks in your mind. So, in my case, I started by sorting my fabric stash by colour and then moved onto my button stash. Next, I went to the kitchen to make myself a coffee and put all the bagged spices into glass jars, then picked some rosemary from the garden and set it to dry. That’s what it’s like to potter: finding enjoyable tasks that don’t feel like a chore; little jobs you want to do, not tasks that you have to do. Tidying your wardrobe is a perfect pottering task shutterstock/Kostikova Natalia Pottering around is also about choosing activities that you can look back on and admire or enjoy, and about allowing yourself to jump from one thing to another without feeling guilty about it. However, scrolling down your phone or sitting in front of the TV doesn't count as pottering! Indeed, keep your pottering digital free as much as possible and you’ll find it much more rewarding this way. So, why give pottering a go? I’ve come to think of pottering as a coping strategy. Sometimes we feel overwhelmed, busy, or anxious, and please raise your hand if you haven’t felt any of these emotions this year! There’s no right way of dealing with these feelings, so the more tools we have, the better our ability to weather any storm will be. In fact, pottering can really help when we feel outside of our comfort zone. How? Here are a few examples: - Pottering about includes some elements of mindfulness, such as the commitment to be intentional and aware of the present. It’s also similar to mindfulness in that it’s a conscious way of using our time, encourages relaxation and non-striving. indeed, there’s enormous freedom in realizing that we don’t always have to fill our spare time trying to achieve something. Potter around for a while and you’ll start to discover pleasure and beauty in small things. In my case, I realised how rewarding it was to arrange fabric by colour; how delightful it was to find little differences in colour shade or intensity. It’s something I’d probably have never experienced if I hadn’t decided to potter about, and for that I am grateful. It can help you learn to pace your routine and slow down a notch. It’s so relieving to finally understand that we don’t always have to be speeding onto the next thing and running from deadline to deadline. Time is a luxury, so treat yourself by learning to take things slowly. Pottering isn’t goal-oriented and so it can be considered part of slow living, which has multiple benefits, from better digestive health to a more positive mindset. Linked to this is the fact that pottering can help us re-assess what it means to be productive. You can say there’s 'normal' (or productive) time and time to potter about. Both have their own advantages, but the thing with productive time is that we can only keep at it for so long before fatigue or burnout set in. This is why it’s important to balance it with time to just potter around. I’ve already said that pottering isn't doing nothing at all, it’s an active pursuit that entails movement without the rush we usually associate with 'being on the move'. There’s plenty of evidence confirming the benefits of controlled and slow-paced physical movement. For example, practices like tai chi are sometimes described as 'medication in motion' that can reduce stress and improve cardiovascular health. You can jump straight into pottering, since you don’t need anything special to get started and it’s not like taking up a hobby that requires specific gear or tools. If you want to potter about, just look around and you’ll find plenty of simple things you can do with what you already have. “Potter around for a while and you’ll discover pleasure and beauty in small things. Pottering helps you learn to pace your routine and slow down a notch. You may want to have a look at this article, where Anna McGovern describes the benefits of pottering. She found herself overwhelmed by that familiar feeling of everything happening at the same time, struggling with a busy schedule, with personal and professional disappointment, and emotional exhaustion. To cope with the situation, she decided to set aside one day a week to just potter around. And, in her own words, making that decision changed her life, and in the end she published a book about it. Some ideas for potterers If you need some inspiration to get you started with pottering, here's a list of ideas to get you kick-started into action: Gardening or landscaping – without any pressure! It can be as simple as watering the plants, cutting a few herbs to use in the kitchen, or gathering a few evergreen branches to make a Christmas wreath. Going for a mindful walk. Writing a thank you note to a friend. Sorting out your fabric or yarn stash. Grinding favourite coffee beans. Neatly folding the clothes in your dresser. Organising your tool box. Decluttering. Cleaning and sorting the cutlery drawer. Hanging a bird feeder in your balcony or patio. Making some DIY potpourri. Enjoying your very own tea ceremony or ritual. Reorganising book shelves. Going through recipe books and finding new dishes to try. Polishing jewellery. Polishing wooden surfaces. Oiling those squeaky door hinges. Tackling “the bag of bags”: that plastic bag full of plastic bags we all have at home! Creating a music playlist for working, relaxing, or reading. Pottering around in the garden shutterstock/goodluz One last suggestion is to keep track of all the good things that happen once you allow yourself time to potter. This will generate awareness and appreciation for this way of using time, and you may discover something new about yourself too. Conclusion: the power of pottering Pottering around is a great coping strategy that you can turn into healing self-care sessions where you experience time without pressure and learn to just be. So, are you ready to become a potterer? Give it a try, discover the magic of pottering about, and find peace, contentment and happiness. • happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member? Sign up for free now to: ■ enjoy our happiness magazine with practical life tips ■ share and support others in our happiness forum ■ self-develop with free online classes in our Academy Stress management | Healthy habits | Simple living Written by Dee Marques A social sciences graduate with a keen interest in languages, communication and personal development strategies. Dee loves exercising, being out in nature, and discovering warm and sunny places where she can escape the winter.

From expressing emotions to making sense of the world, seven artists explain why they write, rap, take photos, draw, dance and make movies. One thing they have in common is that the choice to make art isn't really a choice: it's something they were born to do. By JEREMY ADAM SMITH and JASON MARSH on behalf of Greater Good Science Center. Why do you make art? That’s the simple question Greater Good posed to seven artists. Their answers are surprising and very diverse. They mention making art for fun and adventure; building bridges between themselves and the rest of humanity; reuniting and recording fragments of thought, feeling, and memory; and saying things that they can’t express in any other way. All their answers are deeply personal. In this issue of Greater Good, we explore the possible cognitive and emotional benefits of the arts, and yet these artists evoke a more fundamental benefit: they are just doing what they feel they’re born to do. 1. Gina Gibney: Giving power to others Gina Gibney is the artistic director of the New York-based Gina Gibney Dance Company, which was founded in 1991 to serve a dual mission: to create and perform contemporary choreography that draws upon the strength and insights of women and men, and to enrich and reshape lives through programs that give voice to communities in need, especially survivors of domestic abuse and individuals living with HIV/AIDS. “I make art for a few reasons. In life, we experience so much fragmentation of thought and feeling. For me, creating art brings things back together. In my own work, that is true throughout the process. In the beginning, developing the basic raw materials for the work is deeply reflective and informative. Later, bringing those materials together into a form — distilling and shaping movement, creating a context, working toward something that feels cohesive and complete. That’s incredibly powerful for me — something that really keeps me going. © Andrzej Olejniczak/Gina Gibney “Interestingly, the body of my work is like a catalogue of the events and thoughts of my life. For me, making work is almost like keeping a journal. Giving that to someone else — as a kind of gift through live performance — is the most meaningful aspect of my work. “I make art for a few reasons. In life, we experience so much fragmentation of thought and feeling. For me, creating art brings things back together.” “Dance is a powerful art form for the very reason that it doesn’t need to explain or comment on itself. One of the most amazing performances I have ever seen in my life was of a woman — a domestic violence survivor — dancing in a tiny conference room in a domestic violence shelter for other survivors. She was not a professional dancer. She was a woman who had faced unbelievable challenges and who was living with a great deal of sadness. She created and performed an amazing solo — but to have described her performance as “sad” would have been to diminish what we experienced. “That’s the power of dance. You can feel something and empathize with it on a very deep level, and you don’t have to put words to it.” 2. Judy Dater: I like expressing emotions Judy Dater has been making photographs for more than 40 years and is considered one of America’s foremost photographers. The recipient of a Guggenheim and many other awards, her books include Imogen Cunningham: A Portrait, Women and Other Visions, Body and Soul and Cycles. “I like expressing emotions — to have others feel what it is I’m feeling when I’m photographing people. “Empathy is essential to portraiture. I’ve done landscapes, and I think they can be very poetic and emotional, but it’s different from the directness of photographing a person. I think photographing people is, for me, the best way to show somebody something about themselves — either the person I photograph or the person looking — that maybe they didn’t already know. Maybe it’s presumptuous, but that’s the desire. I feel like I’m attending to people when I’m photographing them, and I think I understand people better because I’ve been looking at them intensely for 40-some years.” A portrait by Judy Dater 3. Pete Docter: It’s fun making things Pete Docter has been involved in some of Pixar Studio’s most popular and seminal animated features, including Toy Story, A Bug’s Life, Cars, and Wall-E, but he is best known as the director of the Academy-Award-winning Monsters, Inc. Docter is currently directing Up, set for release in May of 2009. “I make art primarily because I enjoy the process. It’s fun making things. And I’m sure there is also that universal desire to connect with other people in some way, to tell them about myself or my experiences. RELATED: The Life Cube – changing the world through art “What I really look for in a project is something that resonates with life as I see it, and speaks to our experiences as humans. That probably sounds pretty highfalutin’ coming from someone who makes cartoons, but I think all the directors at Pixar feel the same way. We want to entertain people, not only in the vacuous, escapist sense (though to be sure, there’s a lot of that in our movies too), but in a way that resonates with the audience as being truthful about life — some deeper emotional experience that they recognize in their own existence. “I make art primarily because I enjoy the process. It’s fun making things. And I’m sure there is also that universal desire to connect with other people in some way.” “On the surface, our films are about toys, monsters, fish or robots; at a foundational level, they’re about very universal things: our own struggles with mortality, loss and defining who we are in the world. As filmmakers, we’re pretty much cavemen sitting around the campfire telling stories, only we use millions of dollars of technology to do it. By telling stories, we connect with each other. We talk about ourselves, our feelings, and what it is to be human. Or we just make cartoons. Either way, we try to have a good time, and we hope the audience does too.” 4. Harrell Fletcher: Anything anyone calls art is art Harrell Fletcher teaches in the art department at Portland State University. He has exhibited at the San Francisco Museum of Modern Art, the Berkeley Art Museum, Socrates Sculpture Park in New York, and in numerous other museums and galleries around the world. In 2002, Fletcher started Learning To Love You More, a participatory website with Miranda July, which they turned into a book, published in 2007. Fletcher is the recipient of the 2005 Alpert Award in Visual Arts. “The question of why I make art needs to be broken down a bit before I can answer. First of all, what is art? The definition of art that I have come up with, which seems to work best for me, is that anything anyone calls art is art. This comes from my belief that there is nothing intrinsic about art. We cannot do a chemical analysis to determine if something is art or not. Instead, I feel like calling something “art” is really just a subjective way of indicating value — which could be aesthetic, cultural, monetary and so on. © Harell Fletcher. An image from "The Problem of Possible Redemption 2003" “If we look at other kinds of creative activity we can see how various forms can all exist and be valid at the same time. I’ve made what I think of as art since I was a child, initially drawings, then photographs, paintings, videos, and so on. By the time I got to graduate school, I was not so interested in making more stuff, and instead started to move into another direction, which these days is sometimes called “Social Practice.” “This is sort of a confusing term since it is so new and undefined. In a broad way, I think of it as the opposite of Studio Practice — making objects in isolation, to be shown and hopefully sold in a gallery context. Most of the art world operates with this Studio Practice approach. In Social Practice, there is more of an emphasis on ideas and actions than on objects; it can take place outside of art contexts, and there is often a collaborative or participatory aspect to the work. “So, back to the question why I make art. In my case, the projects that I do allow me to meet people I wouldn’t ordinarily meet, travel to places I wouldn’t normally go to, learn about subjects that I didn’t know I would be interested in, and sometimes even help people out in small ways that make me feel good. I like to say that what I’m after is to have an interesting life and doing the work that I do as an artist helps me achieve that. 5. Kwame Dawes: An environment of empathy Kwame Dawes, Ph.D., is Distinguished Poet in Residence at the University of South Carolina. He is the author of 13 books of verse, most recently Gomer’s Song, and a novel, She’s Gone, which won the 2008 Hurston/Wright Legacy Award for Best First Novel. “I write in what is probably a vain effort to somehow control the world in which I live, recreating it in a manner that satisfies my sense of what the world should look like and be like. I’m trying to capture in language the things that I see and feel, as a way of recording their beauty and power and terror, so that I can return to those things and relive them. In that way, I try to have some sense of control in a chaotic world. © Rachel Eliza Griffiths “I want to somehow communicate my sense of the world — that way of understanding, engaging, experiencing the world — to somebody else. I want them to be transported into the world that I have created with language. “And so the ultimate aim of my writing is to create an environment of empathy, something that would allow the miracle of empathy to take place, where human beings can seem to rise out of themselves and extend themselves into others and live within others. That has a tremendous power for the human being. And I know this because that is what other people’s writing does to me when I read it.” 6. James Sturm: The reasons are unimportant James Sturm is a cartoonist and co-founder of the Center for Cartoon Studies in White River Junction, Vermont. He is the author of the best-selling and award-winning graphic novel The Golem’s Mighty Swing, chosen as the Best Graphic Novel of 2000 by Time magazine. In 2007, his trilogy of historical graphic novels was collected in a volume entitled James Sturm’s America: God, Gold, and Golems. “I like the question “Why do you make art?” because it assumes what I do is art. A flattering assumption. The question also takes me back to my freshman year of college, where such questions like “What is nature?” and “Is reality a wave or a circle?” were earnestly debated (usually late at night and after smoking too much weed). “Twenty-five years later I’d like to think I am a little more clear-headed regarding this question. Perhaps the only insight I’ve gained is the knowledge that I have no idea and, secondly, the reasons are unimportant. Depending on my mood, on any given day, I could attribute making art to a high-minded impulse to connect with others or to understand the world or a narcissistic coping mechanism or a desire to be famous or therapy or as my religious discipline or to provide a sense of control or a desire to surrender control, etc., etc., etc. “Whatever the reason, an inner compulsion exists and I continue to honour this internal imperative. If I didn’t, I would feel really horrible. I would be a broken man. So, whether attempting to make art is noble or selfish, the fact remains that I will do it nevertheless. Anything past this statement is speculation. I would be afraid that by proclaiming why I make art would be generating my own propaganda.” 7. KRS-One: Hip-hop is beyond time, beyond space Lawrence Krisna Parker, better known by his stage name KRS-One, is widely considered by critics and other MCs to be one of hip-hop’s most influential figures. At the 2008 Black Entertainment Television Awards, KRS-One was the recipient of the Lifetime Achievement Award for his rapping and activism. “I was born this way, born to make art, to make hip-hop. And I think I’m just one of the people who had the courage to stay with my born identity. Hip-hop keeps me true to myself, keeps me, human. “Hip-hop is the opposite of technology. Hip-hop is what the human body does: Breaking, DJing, graffiti writing. The human body breakdances, you can’t take that away. DJing is not technology; it’s human intelligence over technology: cutting, mixing, scratching. It’s physical. The manipulation of technology is what humans do, that’s art. “I was born this way, born to make art, to make hip-hop. And I think I’m just one of the people who had the courage to stay with my born identity.” “Or take graffiti writing. Put a writing utensil in any kid’s hand at age two or three. They will not write on a paper like they’ll later be socialized to do, they will write on the walls. They’re just playing. That’s human. Graffiti reminds you of your humanity when you scrawl your self-expression on the wall. Hip-hop helps us to see the things in the world in new ways. “That’s why hip hop has kept me young. It doesn’t allow you to grow up too fast. Hip hop is beyond time, beyond space. That’s why I make hip-hop.” ● happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practice, share Are you a happiness.com member yet? Sign up for free now to: ■ enjoy our happiness magazine with practical life tips ■ share and support others in our happiness forum ■ learn with free online classes in our happiness Academy Film | Poetry | Crafts | Literature Written by Greater Good Science Center This article originally appeared on Greater Good, the online magazine of the Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkeley. happiness.com is honoured to republish them with the kind permission of the Greater Good Science Center. greatergood.berkeley.edu

With a saturated market, how do you pick the best book on mindfulness to suit you? You listen to our expert Ann Vrlak, that's how! Here she shares her Top 10 reads, whatever your mindfulness stance: beginner, skeptic, parent, science geek, and more. Are you interested in mindfulness, but overwhelmed by all the learning choices out there? Today, there are many kinds of mindfulness practices available to us. You can discover more through books, mindfulness podcasts, apps and courses, and each has its advantages. Many people love using mindfulness and meditation apps, for example, because the teacher guides them step by step. Books are your best path for in-depth learning about mindfulness. You can dive deep into the meaning of mindfulness practices, how they work and how people have been helped by using them in the real world with real challenges, like anxiety, depression, dissatisfaction at work, loneliness and more. The good news about all these choices is you can find a mindfulness practice that is tailored to fit exactly what your challenges or interests are. The bad news is all these choices can make it hard for a beginner to know where to start – but don’t worry, I’m here to help! Mindfulness: our pick of the best books I’ve done the hard work for you and found what I think are ten of the best books about mindfulness on the market. When you become more mindful, you become a little more present every day, a little happier and a little more able to respond well to whatever life brings your way. I've selected these mindfulness books based on different categories – such as best books for skeptics, for kids, for science-lovers, or those that want more practical mindfulness advice– so that can help you start your journey into mindfulness, whatever your position. 1. If you’re new to mindfulness Wherever You Go, There You Are: Mindfulness Meditation in Everyday Life by Jon Kabat-Zinn I’ve included two books by Jon Kabat-Zinn in this “best of” list with good reason. Kabat-Zinn is the creator of a program used around the world called Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR). It came out of his experience as a long-time student of Buddhism and as a Professor Emeritus of medicine. Kabat-Zinn writes in a warm, down-to-earth way as he describes step by step how mindfulness can bring richness and meaning back into what you do every day: making breakfast for your family, driving to work or school, and relating to other people. And he talks about the many proven benefits of mindfulness on well-being and happiness. 2. If you’re interested In mindfulness for children Child’s Mind: Mindfulness Practices to Help Our Children Be More Focused, Calm and Relaxed by Christopher Willard What a wonderful time for mindfulness for children! There are more studies done each year that show how simple, non-religious mindfulness practices bring all kinds of wonderful benefits to children, from more calm, to more empathy for themselves and others, to more confidence, and reduced anxiety and depression. • JOIN US! Sign up to learn more about meditation and mindfulness • My choice for best mindfulness book for adults about kids and mindfulness is Child’s Mind by Christopher Willard. This book is a lovely blend of psychology and mindfulness that delves into children’s gifts and challenges. After an excellent, short chapter on mindfulness basics, the book is divided up into different practices. Willard describes the benefits of each practice, which challenge it's best suited to (such as trouble falling asleep, for example) and steps on how to lead a child through it. The exercises like “Know Your Orange” and “Hugging Meditation” are simple, active ways for kids to gently explore mindfulness. 3. If you're a kid yourself interested in mindfulness Sitting Still Like a Frog: Mindfulness Exercises for Kids (and Their Parents) by Eline Snel What is mindfulness like? Well, it’s like sitting still like a frog, of course! You sit patiently and quietly, until there is something that needs your attention, and then you jump! The author creates fun and creative kid-friendly versions of basic adult mindfulness skills: like watching your worries go by on a conveyor belt, weathering the storm of emotions, and getting out of your head and into your body. The book, ideally for kids five to 12, includes a CD with guided practices that are lovingly narrated by the author. RELATED: The benefits of meditation for kids 4. If you’re a skeptic The Mindful Geek: Secular Meditation for Smart Skeptics by Michael W. Taft Are you curious but skeptical about mindfulness? Do you want more proof and less promises about how mindfulness works? This entertaining book, written by a tried and true skeptic, is for you. Michael Taft went on a quest to learn about mindfulness and the result is a fact-based book on practices, how you do them and how they affect you psychologically, neurologically and behaviourally. The author walks you through each exercise, in a no-nonsense style and discusses how they've been shown to help others facing anxiety, depression, chronic stress and dissatisfaction at work. 5. If you prefer practical tips How to Train a Wild Elephant and Other Adventures in Mindfulness: Simply Daily Mindfulness Practices for Living Life More Fully and Joyfully by Jan Chozen Bays, MD. I love this little book and nominate it as one of the best books on mindfulness. Jan Chozen has crafted 53 mindfulness exercises like, “Every Time the Phone Rings,” “When Eating Just Eat,” “Are You Overlooking Something?” and, one of my favourites, “Say Yes.” Each chapter is short, and describes the practice itself – usually in one simple sentence. She gives you ideas on how to remind yourself to do the practice every day, and some discoveries to watch for. “Books are your best path for in-depth learning about mindfulness. You can dive deep into the meaning of mindfulness practices, how they work and how people have been helped by using them.” The best part of each chapter is the “Deeper Lessons.” Here Chozen Bays talks about the purpose and meaning of these deceptively simple practices. These lessons help you see how what you learn could transform your life in very real ways. 6. If you want to reduce stress or anxiety Full Catastrophe Living: Using the Wisdom of Your Body and Mind to Face Stress, Pain, and Illness by Jon Kabat-Zinn This is the second book by Jon Kabat-Zinn that makes the best mindfulness book list for me. This inspired work is so full of understanding about living with anxiety and stress, and so full of ways mindfulness can help, I couldn’t leave it out. • JOIN US! Sign up today and make new friends at happiness.com • Kabat-Zinn dives in-depth into the modern pandemic of stress. He describes how far-reaching the effects of stress are, and how unaware we may be of those effects: poor sleep, poor digestion, negative chemicals saturating our brains, and an erosion of connection with ourselves and others. He lays out the science on the mind-body connection and how mindfulness can be a powerful tool to promote physical, psychological and spiritual healing. 7. If you want to improve your work performance or enjoyment Mindfulness at Work: How to Avoid Stress, Achieve More, and Enjoy Life! by Dr. Stephen McKenzie Mindfulness is a tool to make everyday living more enjoyable and meaningful – and this includes work. Most of us spend about a third of our lives at work, so when it becomes a source of stress and dissatisfaction, it can take a huge toll on our peace of mind. RELATED: Mindfulness at work - 6 productive tips The author brings the practice of mindfulness to the most common work stresses many of us experience. You’ll learn how to improve your focus, sense of satisfaction and decision-making and, perhaps most important, your ability to have peaceful, positive relationships with work colleagues. 8. If you want to read a classic Practising the Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle The Power of Now is a ground-breaking classic on meditation. This follow-up book, Practising the Power of Now, takes some of the core ideas from the original and presents them in short practices you can try as you go about your day. Some practices ask you to take a few mindful minutes in a quiet place, but most offer ideas for how to explore mindfulness when you’re with other people, driving, facing a stressful situation or wanting to make a good choice in a difficult situation. Try this book to discover the power of now for yourself. 9. If you want to geek out on the science Buddha’s Brain: The Practical Neuroscience of Happiness, Love, and Wisdom by Rick Hanson Rick Hanson is one of the best translators of mindfulness practices for beginners. He’s also a neuroscientist and an expert on the fascinating world of our minds: how they have evolved to survive, what happens in our minds and bodies when we’re being mindful instead of stressed, how we can develop lifelong habits that slowly but surely help our brains to see more of the “good,” rather than what stresses us – and much more. Hanson has a lot of science at his fingertips and he presents it in a way that’s easy to understand and applicable to your life. And he draws a map of how all this can help you become more happy, loving and wise! 10. If you're a deep thinker The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself by Michael A. Singer One of the best mindfulness books is The Untethered Soul. It's a rich book, heartfelt and practical at the same time. If you’re someone who is deeply curious about your inner world, about how your habitual thoughts and emotions affect you, I fully recommend this book. The author looks at how all of us come into adulthood with a whole repertoire of thoughts and emotions that we barely question, but which govern everything we see, believe and do. Using traditional mindfulness practices he shows you how to build a loving relationship with your deepest self and to choose new a new path that will free you from sometimes lifelong patterns of suffering and unhappiness. Final thoughts I hope at least one of these picks from the best books on mindfulness speaks to an interest or challenge you have right now. Try a few of them and go with the author that you feel the strongest connection with. Do they speak from experience? Do they care about you as a learner and approach mindfulness in a non-judgmental, caring way? Listen to what feels right for you and enjoy the journey of mindfulness! ● Main image: shutterstock/Dudarev Mikhail Which of these mindfulness books have you read or recommend? Any which would you add to the list? Share your thoughts in the comments below... Written by Ann Vrlak Ann Vrlak is Founder of OneSelf Meditation and a meditation practitioner for over 25 years. She’s a Certified Meditation Teacher for adults and for children (the best job ever!). She loves to share how the perspective and practice of meditation can support people with their everyday stresses and on their journey of self-discovery.

Still have your doubts that meditation really works? Then here's the scientific proof to suggest that it does. Sonia Vadlamani looks at some of the key meditation studies and discusses why consistency is key when it comes to getting results. Gone are the days when meditation was a practice reserved mostly for yogis and Buddhist monks. Meditation is now a phenomenon that has transgressed set notions – thanks in part to the ubiquitous nature of apps like Calm and Headspace – most people have heard of meditation, even if they’ve never tried it. Celebrities such as the Beatles, Madonna and Oprah Winfrey have also played their part in helping meditation permeate into the mainstream. In fact, the global meditation market was worth $1.2 billion in 2017, and this figure is set to reach $2 billion by 2022. Yet, while trying to find a balance between app subscriptions, self-reflection, hectic schedules and time constraints, if you’ve ever thought 'does meditation really work?', then you're not alone! Several styles of meditation exist, with transcendental, mindfulness, mantra and gratitude meditation being some of the most widely practised. Any form of meditation can prove to be challenging – especially in the beginning. But science shows that if you find the right form of meditation for you, and be consistent with your practice – then meditation really does work. Let’s take a look at the proof after briefly revisiting some of meditation's benefits to the body. The benefits of meditation While different forms of meditation exist, they all have a common aim – to train your mind to concentrate, and to direct your focus solely on one subject, be that the present moment in mindfulness meditation, or a mantra in mantra meditation. Sofa, so good! Research to date suggests meditation does work shutterstock/fizkes Thus, meditation is essentially a vital exercise for the brain that builds up your ability to ward away distractions and stay engaged. The more focused you are, the lesser you react to external distractions. This also teaches you to calm your senses and react in a sensible and productive manner. There are other science-based benefits of meditation too – it helps alleviate stress, improves heart health and boosts brain power. The key parameter, nonetheless, is that one needs to be consistent with their chosen meditation practice in order to begin seeing any short-term or long-term benefits. Indeed, science shows that consistent meditation rewires the brain by increasing the density of regions related to self-awareness, concentration, memory, and compassion. At the same time, the sections of the brain linked to stress and anxiety tend to become less dense. The proof that meditation really does work There's been growing scientific interest in meditation in the past decade and the research clearly supports the idea that meditation does work. Let's take a look at some key studies. A 2012 trial study by Goyal M et al. at Johns Hopkins University on more than 3,500 participants revealed that meditation could play a moderate role in managing cortisol, the stress hormone known to create responses like disrupted sleep, impaired judgment, rise in depressive thoughts and anxiety. RELATED: Can't sleep? 14 fixes to get a good night's rest Another experiment by David M Levy et al. at the University of Washington found that mindful meditation can help reduce distractions and eliminate the tendency to multitask, thus helping individuals stay focused and feel more positive emotion regarding their task performance. “All the recent science-backed evidence shows that meditation really does work – if you’re consistent with your practice.” As for long-term benefits, meditation has been linked directly to a healthier and more preserved ageing brain. A study conducted by UCLA found that participants that practised meditation for an average of 20 years had more brain grey matter volume (responsible for processing information) than non-meditators. And a systematic literature review by Amy Gimson et al. at University of Southampton and University College London implied that meditation could be an essential aid to prevent or alleviate the symptoms of anxiety for individuals in their 40s or above, thus lowering the risk of cognitive impairment and dementia. So, how long before meditation starts to work? Several new meditators mistakenly assume that they will begin to experience the full benefits of meditation within a few days. Others think of meditation as an over-the-counter instant pain-relief medicine, or as a cure-all for all their problems. Using guided mediation apps work for many people shutterstock/Africa Studio The truth is that meditation is not the quick-fix one may be seeking, and there's no set time period for it to start ‘working’. In fact, while some beginners may start noticing certain benefits immediately, most people would need to practice meditation on a regular basis to be able to appreciate its advantages. RELATED: Meditation for beginners – our top 6 videos The key here is to not overthink it and select a suitable meditation practice which you can perform consistently. There’s no set time for how long you should meditate – it’s ideal to observe how long you can manage or feel the need to meditate, especially when you’re just starting out. It’s best to start small, and to not jump into extended meditation programs right away. Meditating for just three to five minutes has been proven to be beneficial. Finishing five-minute meditation sits initially for say, a week, will reward you with a feeling of accomplishment early on, allowing you to believe that you’re ready for longer meditation sessions. A 2012 study showed that meditating for 11 minutes regularly for eight weeks resulted in improved mood and sleep, lower levels of perceived stress and reduced depressive thoughts in patients with cognitive impairment, and their caregivers. “The truth is that meditation is not the quick-fix one may be seeking, and there's no set time period for it to start 'working'”. Indeed, so far other studies point to the idea that consistency of meditation – not necessarily the duration – is key for you to start experiencing its benefits. You may find even one meditation session to be incredible, but the real power comes from being able to keep at it every single day. A simple meditation technique that works Meditating is a simple process – it doesn’t require any magic tricks or hacks. All you need is a quiet place to sit in and concentrate. If you find it challenging to meditate amidst a chaotic day, we suggest a morning meditation upon waking is a calm and peaceful way to start your day before it becomes busy. RELATED: 5 strategies to help you develop a regular meditation practice Sit in a comfortable place – a chair or on a cushion on the floor – with your back straight. Set a timer for as many minutes you can conveniently meditate for and close your eyes. Now, try to relax your body and focus on your breath – inhaling and exhaling slowly. Do not try to curb away your thoughts. Instead, when a thought enters your mind – trivial as it may be – notice it, acknowledge the thought, and let it exit your mind. Go back to focusing on your breath. With time and practice, you’ll find it easier to keep thoughts and urges at bay, and your ability to concentrate will get stronger. Installing meditation apps on your phone may help you create a more suitable environment for meditation, and their guided meditations might make it easier for you to concentrate. Like we mentioned earlier, there’s no set rule or method for meditation, except that you should be consistent with your practice. The takeaway: does meditation really work? All the recent science-backed evidence shows that meditation really does work – if you’re consistent with your practice. If you’re still not convinced, we would encourage you to try it for yourself and experience the benefits. Start small, as we’ve suggested. Even finding the time to meditate for two to five minutes every day will enable you to train your brain. As Arianna Huffington, co-founder of Huffington Post – who has been meditating since she was 13 says: “starting with just five minutes of meditation every day will open the door to creating a powerful habit, and the many proven benefits it brings.” Main image: shutterstock/Koldunov Written by Sonia Vadlamani Fitness and healthy food blogger, food photographer and stylist, travel-addict. Sonia loves to write and has resolved to dedicate her life to revealing how easy and important it is to be happier, stronger and fitter each day. Follow her pursuits at FitFoodieDiary or on Instagram.

Accepting our mortality helps us let go of busyness and focus on what’s most important to us in order to live a happier, more meaningful life. By OLIVER BURKEMAN on behalf of Greater Good Science Center. The average human lifespan is absurdly, terrifyingly finite. If you’re lucky and you live to 80, you will have lived about 4,000 weeks. This truth, which most of us ignore most of the time, is something to wrestle with if we want to spend our limited time on this earth well. Given that, it follows that time management, broadly defined, should be everyone’s chief concern. Yet the modern discipline of time management (or productivity) is depressingly narrow-minded, focused on devising the perfect morning routine or trying to crank through as many tasks as possible, while investing all your energy on reaching some later state of well-being and accomplishment. It ignores the fact that the world is bursting with wonder — and that experiencing more of that wonder may come at the cost of productivity. As a recovering “productivity geek,” I know how it feels to become swept up in the idea of discovering the perfect system of time management. But I was eventually forced to accept that my struggles to achieve a sense of perfect control or mastery of my time were counterproductive, leading not to a life of more meaning but one of more overwhelm and stress. I came to see that I needed to give up the quest for that kind of control, letting go of the impossible goal of becoming perfectly efficient and embracing my limitations instead, so as to make more time for what was really valuable. Part of that embrace of limitation involves facing the anxiety that comes with acknowledging mortality. When we recognize the shortness of life — and accept the fact that some things have to be left unaccomplished, whether we like it or not — we are freer to focus on what matters. Rather than succumbing to the mentality of “better, faster, more,” we can embrace being imperfect, and be happier for it. Here are 10 suggestions I make in my book, Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals, about how to live with your limited time in mind. 1. Adopt a “fixed volume” approach to productivity We all need to make tough choices about what we can realistically get done, so that we can prioritize the activities that matter most, instead of reacting to a constant barrage of demands. One way is to keep two to-do lists — one for everything on your plate, one for the 10 or fewer things that you’re currently working on. Fill up the 10 slots on the second list with items from the first, then set to work. The rule is not to move any further items from the first list onto the second until you’ve freed up a slot by finishing one of the 10 items. A related strategy is to set a pre-established time boundary for certain types of daily work — for example, to resolve to write from 8 to 11 a.m. — and to make sure you stop when time’s up. 2. Serialize Focus only on one big project at a time. Though it’s alluring to try to alleviate the anxiety of having too many responsibilities or ambitions by getting started on them all at once, you’ll make little progress that way. Multitasking rarely works well — and you’ll soon find that serializing helps you to complete more projects anyway, thereby helping relieve your anxiety. Forget multitasking: tackle one project at a time 3. Decide in advance what to fail at You’ll inevitably underachieve at something, simply because your time and energy are finite. But strategic underachievement — nominating in advance areas of your life in which you won’t expect excellence — helps you focus your time and energy more effectively. For example, you might decide in advance that it’s OK to have a cluttered kitchen while you finish your novel, or to do the bare minimum on a particular work project, so you can spend more time with your children. “When we recognize the shortness of life — and accept the fact that some things have to be left unaccomplished, whether we like it or not — we are freer to focus on what matters.” To live this way is to replace the high-pressure quest for work-life balance with something more reasonable: a deliberate kind of imbalance. 4. Focus on what you’ve already completed, not just what’s left to do Since the quest to get everything done is interminable by definition, it’s easy to grow despondent and self-reproachful when you can’t get through your whole to-do list. One counter-strategy is to keep a “done list,” which starts empty first thing in the morning, but which you can gradually fill in throughout the day as you get things done. It’s a cheering reminder that you could have spent the day doing nothing remotely constructive… yet you didn’t. 5. Consolidate your caring Social media is a giant machine for getting you to spend your time caring about the wrong things — and too many of them at once. We’re exposed to an unending stream of atrocities and injustices, each of which might have a legitimate claim on our time and our charitable donations, but which add up to something no human could ever effectively address comprehensively. Once you grasp that fact fully, it’s good to consciously pick your battles in charity, activism and politics — and devote your spare time only to those specific causes. Focus your capacity for care, so you don’t burn out. 6. Embrace boring and single-purpose technology Digital distractions allow us to escape to a realm where painful human limitations don’t seem to apply: scrolling idly around online, you need never feel bored or constrained in your freedom of action, which isn’t the case when it comes to doing work that matters. You can combat this by making your devices as boring as possible, removing social media apps and, if you dare, email. It’s also helpful to choose devices with only one purpose, such as the Kindle reader. Otherwise, temptations will be only a swipe away, and you’ll feel the urge to check your screens anytime you’re bored or facing a challenge in your work. 7. Seek out novelty in the mundane Time seems to speed up as we age, likely because our brains encode the passage of years based on how much information we process in any given interval. While children have many novel experiences and time therefore seems slower to them, the routinization of older people’s lives means that time seems to pass at an ever-increasing rate. RELATED: Mindful minutes - 10 small practices that make a big difference The standard advice is to combat this by cramming more novel experiences into your life. That can help, but it’s not always practical. An alternative is to pay more attention to every moment, however mundane — to find novelty by plunging more deeply into your present life. Try going on unplanned walks to see where they lead you, taking up drawing or birdwatching, or playing “I Spy” with a child — whatever draws your attention into the moment more fully. Spend more time on simple pleasures shutterstock/Just dance 8. Be a researcher in relationships The desire to feel in control of our limited time causes numerous problems in relationships, resulting not only in controlling behavior, but also commitment-phobia, the inability to listen, boredom, and missing out on the richness of communal experiences with others. “Pay more attention to every moment, however mundane — to find novelty by plunging more deeply into your present life.” When faced with a challenging or boring moment in a relationship, try being curious about the person you’re with, rather than controlling. Curiosity is a stance well-suited to the inherent unpredictability of life with others, because it can be satisfied by their behaving in ways you like or dislike — whereas if you demand a certain result instead, you’ll often be frustrated. 9. Cultivate instantaneous generosity Whenever a generous impulse arises in your mind, give in to it right away rather than putting it off. Don’t wait to figure out if the recipient deserves your generosity or if you really have the time to be generous right now (with all of the work you have left to do!). Just do it. The rewards are immediate, too, because generous action reliably makes you feel much happier. 10. Practise doing nothing When it comes to the challenge of using your 4,000 weeks well, the capacity to do nothing is indispensable, because if you can’t bear the discomfort of not acting, you’re far more likely to make poor choices with your time, such as attempting to hurry activities that can’t be rushed, or feeling you ought to spend every moment being “productive,” regardless of whether the tasks in question really matter. RELATED: How to practise Niksen – the art of doing nothing Doing nothing means resisting the urge to manipulate your experience or the people and things in the world around you, and to let things be as they are. You can try the “do-nothing” meditation, where you set a timer for 5-10 minutes and then try doing nothing; if you catch yourself doing something — thinking, say, or even just focusing on your breath — gently let go of doing it. As you keep letting go, you’ll increase your ability to do nothing, and gradually regain your autonomy. You’ll no longer be so motivated by the attempt to evade how reality feels here and now; instead, you’ll learn to calm down, and to make better choices with your brief allotment of life. • Main image: shutterstock/Syda Productions This essay is adapted from Four Thousand Weeks, published by Farrar, Straus & Giroux. Copyright © 2021. All rights reserved. happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practice, share Are you a happiness.com member yet? Sign up for free now to: ■ enjoy our happiness magazine with practical life tips ■ share and support others in our happiness forum ■ learn with free online classes in our happiness Academy Mindfulness | Gratitude | Friendship Written by Greater Good Science Center This article originally appeared on Greater Good, the online magazine of the Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkeley. happiness.com is honoured to republish them with the kind permission of the Greater Good Science Center. greatergood.berkeley.edu

Most of us are trying to find greater happiness in our lives. Follow these 11 science-backed tips from Calvin Holbrook every day, and you could naturally boost your well-being. In today's modern and busy world, finding happiness can seem challenging. Our lives are more stressful than ever and we have less time to relax and enjoy life. The recent shift in mainstream media becoming increasingly negative only helps to fuel our anxiety and wider unease, leading to greater misery and unhappiness. Happiness is a state we all want to achieve, but is it even realistically possible to be upbeat and content the whole time? And what exactly is happiness? Would you consider it a way of life, a certain mood, or a state of mind? It's clear happiness levels fluctuate, but is there a way to increase or regulate them? In fact, as most of us have probably realized by now, there’s no magic way to stay joyful all the time. However, there is some science behind the nature of happiness. Furthermore, once we understand this, we can develop our skills to find happiness and remain joyful for longer periods consistently. So, follow these 11 science-backed ways to increase your levels of joy and you should be able to see a positive difference in your daily well-being and discover deeper happiness more easily. Finding happiness: 11 positive changes to make From staying social to practising gratitude: make these 11 changes to your life and start finding more happiness. 1. Stay social and build quality relationships Science is clear on this one: you can find and maintain happiness through developing quality relationships. We humans are a social species and need regular contact. In fact, loneliness is proven to decrease levels of happiness and recent studies show it can even be as harmful to mortality as smoking 15 cigarettes a day. But don’t start adding random people on Facebook just yet: simply having many different acquaintances doesn’t lead to a boost in happiness levels: it’s the quality of those relationships that's key. RELATED: How to make new friends as an adult In a landmark 75-year, multigenerational study, Robert Waldinger measured happiness levels in people from Boston’s poorest neighborhoods. He found that the most joyful were those with high-quality social connections. Lonely people were less happy and, significantly, had poorer health. Having a relationship with a stable and consistently caring person made the difference. So, take time to nurture more meaningful relationships with the people you love while also eliminating toxic friendships. Build your bliss: find happiness by staying close to great friends 2. Force out a smile Buddhist Thích Nhất Hạnh once wrote: “Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy.”’ In fact, studies have shown that smiling and other external expressions work as a continual feedback loop, helping to reinforce our internal emotions. Psychological scientists from the University of Kansas conducted a study in which they assessed the impact of smiling on one’s physical and mental state. They came to the conclusion that making yourself smile can help lower your heart rate during stressful activities. So, smiling even when we feel down or unhappy can actually makes us feel happier. Furthermore, try smiling at strangers, too: studies shows that happiness really is contagious, so you may just get a friendly grin back that lifts you up! This is an easy practical tip which can help you in finding happiness on a daily basis. 3. Find your 'flow' It sounds simple, but take time to think about what you really love doing in life and make an effort to do more of it. Go for simple things you can fit into your schedule on a daily or weekly basis. Maybe it’s being in nature. Perhaps it’s reading, wild swimming, visiting an art gallery, cooking a delicious meal, or just dancing around the living room. Whatever your daily happy buzz, make time for it in your life and it will help you in discovering greater happiness. Better still, if you can find an activity where your mind is fully immersed in a feeling of focus, involvement and enjoyment, you've probably found your flow. This blissful state, where you're totally 'in the zone' creates true moments of joy and helps your forget any worries. Find your flow: do what you love and find deeper happiness 4. Develop a more meaningful life Meaningfulness is a major happy factor that you can extend into your whole life. Whether it's through gardening, volunteering, or becoming politically active, meaningful activities have been shown to boost people's happiness and reduce stress levels at the same time. Indeed, a study from the Annals of Behavioral Medicine found that people who took part in leisure activities became 34 per cent less stressed and 18 per cent less sad. So, finding meaning can translate to finding happiness. 5. Think positive thoughts Some people seem to live by the ‘glass half full’ and ‘every cloud has a silver lining’ anecdotes, and for good reason. In fact, you can actually increase your happiness levels by focusing on positive things and reducing negative thinking. Here's a simple tip: every time you think a negative thought, try and replace it with a positive one. This practice will help to retrain your usual thought patterns to bring more positive thoughts into your life. “Science shows that writing a daily or weekly gratitude journal can make finding happiness easier.” Likewise, changing your perspective on your situation can help in discovering happiness too. If you’ve made a mistake – however big – focus on your past achievements instead, visualizing your successes. Learn more about how to stop ruminating and start living with hope and appreciation. 6. Practise gratitude Showing gratitude is proven to make you feel happier and more humble. We're often focused on what we don't have, but, instead, be grateful for what you do already have: your home, food on the table, clothing, and access to water/electricity. Many millions of people in the world don’t have these things (and, interestingly, many of them are still happy). RELATED: 5 benefits of gratitude practice Moreover, science shows that writing a daily or weekly gratitude journal can make finding happiness easier. The Journal of Happiness Studies published a study that used gratitude letters to test how being grateful can affect our levels of happiness. The researchers concluded that: “Participants included 219 men and women who wrote three letters of gratitude over a three-week period. Results indicated that writing letters of gratitude increased participants' happiness and life satisfaction while decreasing depressive symptoms.” So, put pen to paper before going to bed and be grateful for your day. Finding happiness: gratitude journals helps you appreciate life 7. Stop comparing yourself to others In our social media savvy world, flaunting your travels, relationships and purchases on Instagram is all too common. However, comparing yourself to other people will only lead to unhappiness. Indeed, data from a 2010 Europe-wide survey of 19,000 people showed that those who compared their incomes to others were less happy with what they had. Furthermore, while other people’s lives may appear ‘perfect’, there’s always a hidden story we’re unaware of. We usually only share our best moments on social media, rather than our darkest fears and anxieties. Instead of comparing yourself to others, focus on achieving your own dreams by goal setting. If needed, change your social media habits and/or delete accounts. 8. Exercise daily Working out is proven to boost levels of happiness. In fact, exercise has such a profound effect on well-being that it’s an effective strategy for tackling depression. In a study cited in The Happiness Advantage – a book by Shawn Achor – three groups of patients treated their depression with medication, exercise, or a combination of both. All three groups experienced similar improvements in their happiness levels in early days, but the later follow-up assessments proved very different. Six months later the groups were tested to assess their relapse rate. Of those that had taken the medication alone, 38 per cent had slipped back into depression. Those in the combination group did a little better, with a 31 per cent relapse rate. But with the exercise group, the relapse rate was just nice per cent, suggesting it really did make a difference to finding happiness. So, make sure you fit some exercise into your daily routine. If you’re struggling to find time to get to the gym, you could try mindful running or forest bathing to connect with nature. Wheel good for happiness: boost your well-being through exercise 9. Get plenty of sleep If you don’t rest well, you won’t be able to function at your best. Regular sleep deprivation breaks down our productivity, alertness and mood. Aim for between seven and nine hours kip a night and this will help keep your happiness levels up. A 2017 study from the Division of Sleep and Circadian Disorders at Brigham and Women's Hospital, and MIT Media Lab Affective Computing Group, showed that keeping regular sleep patterns contributes to the happiness and well-being of college students. The study looked at 204 students over one month. The results show that higher sleep regularity was significantly related to higher morning and evening happiness, healthiness and calmness during the week. “Starting your day with just five to ten minutes of meditation will help you in finding happiness. Try meditating in the morning, shortly after waking.” “Irregular sleep-wake schedules are common in our modern society," said lead author Akane Sano, PhD. “Our results indicate the importance of sleep regularity, in addition to sleep duration, and that regular sleep is associated with improved well-being.” Follow these 14 science-backed sleep hacks if you're struggling to get a decent night's kip. 10. Practise meditation Starting your day with just five to ten minutes of meditation will help you to find deeper happiness. Try meditating in the morning shortly after waking: the immediate heightened inner clarity and focus it will give you will set you up for the rest of the day. In fact, there are many studies that have shown that mediation can boost happiness levels by reducing stress hormones, shrinking the part of the brain that controls anxiety, and by stopping rumination, amongst other things. And, according to Psychology Today, meditation is the strongest mental practice that has the power to reset your happiness set point, thus turning you into a more joyful person and literally rewiring major areas in your brain so you can be happier. Feel the focus: finding deeper happiness through meditation 11. Go outside more often While we can’t control the weather, spending time outside is essential for our well-being. In The Happiness Advantage, Shawn Achor recommends spending time in the fresh air to improve your happiness. “Making time to go outside on a nice day also delivers a huge advantage,” he says. “One study found that spending 20 minutes outside in good weather not only boosted positive mood, but broadened thinking and improved working memory.” RELATED: Coastal living – 4 benefits of living by the sea Meanwhile, a study from the University of Sussex corroborated the idea that being outdoors made people happier: “Being outdoors, near the sea, on a warm, sunny weekend afternoon is the perfect spot for most. In fact, participants were found to be substantially happier outdoors in all natural environments than they were in urban environments.” So, whatever the weather, make sure you get outside of your four walls to boost your well-being. Finding happiness: the takeaway Finally, one last thing. Science also suggests that some people are simply ‘born happier’. Indeed, we all enter this world with different temperaments and often maintain a certain state of happiness over our lifetimes. In The How of Happiness, researcher Sonja Lyubomirsky suggests that only around 40 per cent of our happiness is under our control (recent life events and biological set points predetermine the other 60 per cent). So, if accurate, this research means only about half of happiness levels can be controlled at any given moment. If you can incorporate as many of these 11 steps into your daily life, you should be able to increase your happiness levels over a period of time. Seeking out a positive state of mind, practising certain actions, and enhancing quality relationships all help: but these habits require consistent work to be successful and help you in finding happiness. ● happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member yet? Sign up free to: ■ enjoy our happiness magazine ■ share and support in our happiness forum ■ self-develop with free online Academy classes Authenticity | Motivation | Courage | Success Written by Calvin Holbrook Calvin edits the happiness magazine, makes gay artwork and loves swimming, yoga, dancing to house/techno, and all things vintage! Find out more.

If you regularly struggle with making choices, you could be living with so-called 'decision fatigue'. Psychologist Stanislava Puač Jovanović explains how to tackle indecisiveness with seven practical techniques, so you can move forward with your life. It’s normal to be indecisive every once in a while, especially if you’re about to make a meaningful, life-changing decision. However, if you find yourself frequently agonising over the most straightforward choice such as picking spaghetti or pizza, there might be something else lurking behind your indecisiveness. I bought my apartment without even seeing it in person. I was simply too psychologically exhausted from unrelated demands and decisions I was making each day. I couldn’t bring myself to ponder over what’s nearby, whether there’s an elevator in the building, and which side of the world the bedroom is facing. So, I went for the first ad I came across that seemed remotely fine and fitted my budget. True story. Luckily, it’s a great apartment, and I didn’t regret it. However, it might have also been one of the worst decisions I had made in years. How is this relevant? When you can’t make decisions (or can’t be bothered to), there is likely to be a hidden reason behind it. The good news is that there are also ways you can overcome it. This article will help you understand indecision, why it happens, and how to try and avoid making bad choices. Struggle with indecisiveness? You could have decision fatigue There are plenty of reasons why a person might be indecisive. Some are related to the decision itself, such as a lack of information. However, many are not. We’ll concentrate on the latter because that are the reasons that could, ironically, make decisions about your life for you. The path to freedom: learn how to be less indecisive Emotional disturbances Indecision could be a symptom of an emotional disturbance. Depression, in particular, is tied with a negative outlook on the future, our own worth, and the intentions and character of others. Additionally, motivation is often non-existent. A depressive person will, therefore, have a hard time making any choice whatsoever – or wanting to make one. RELATED: The time is now: how to stop worrying about the future Indecision can also stem from anxiety. An anxious person might be at an advantage in terms of making sure that they have enough information before deciding on something. However, anxiety (and, similarly, high neuroticism) mostly results in being unable to make up one’s mind beyond any practical reason. It causes overwhelming fear of making the wrong choice and not being capable of coping with it. The dread of hurting, alienating, and disappointing others could also be too much to bear. So, indecision becomes a sort of a defence mechanism. Dysfunctional beliefs We’re all tangled up in a myriad of beliefs about ourselves, others, and the world. Some are accessible to our conscious examination. However, some escape our critical analysis. Those are usually the ones we embraced as a part of ourselves when we were very young and never got to question them again. Dysfunctional beliefs meddle with our career choice, romantic relationships, or any other decision, for that matter. Convictions about how things should be could make us either procrastinate or, on the other hand, make rash decisions. Perfectionism is a textbook example of a creed that often causes severe indecisiveness. “There are plenty of reasons why a person might struggle with indecisiveness. Some are related to the decision itself, such as a lack of information. However, many are not.” Nowadays, we have more options than ever before in human history. We get to pick (or be a part of the decision about) almost every aspect of our day-to-day living. In fact, researchers at Cornell University found that we are making an average of 35,000 remotely conscious decisions each day. That’s a lot of opportunities to get it wrong. And it’s exhausting. With this, we reach an interesting source of wavering or being paralysed when we stand facing a decision. When we are indecisive, we might be ego-depleted. According to Roy Baumeister, a social psychologist who extensively examined this phenomenon, our willpower comes in limited supply. With each choice we make, we drain a bit of this resource. Bear in mind that we’re not only making choices between different meals, careers, or towns to live in. We are, daily, also choosing to suppress our basic, low-lying urges. We decide to replace them with higher-order, more responsible choices favouring long-term benefit. Yet, as a result, we end up experiencing decision fatigue. We then tend to procrastinate, go for the easiest option, act impulsively, or rely on rules of thumb. Can’t make decisions? Here are 7 strategies that work The consequences of being indecisive often go beyond missing a train because you weren’t sure if you wanted to go left or right. They stretch much further and can cause innumerable trouble. Indecision could make you act irrationally. Your career, personal relationships, health, and your overall well-being could suffer. So, discover these seven tried and tested ways you can overcome indecision and avoid its adverse consequences. 1. Make important decisions early in the day Decision fatigue usually happens at the end of a decision-riddled day. You probably know the horror of deciding what to have for dinner after you’ve spent ten hours at work, making critical judgments. Now, a dinner choice is a relatively insignificant matter. However, if it were the ruling on whether to move, marry, or change a career, decision fatigue could, potentially, mess up your life. So, make sure that you leave the (expected) significant decision-making for the morning, when you’re rested and clear-minded. 2. Routinize the banal choices Some of the most successful people have a curious habit. You might have noticed that Obama, Zuckerberg, or Steve Jobs wear (wore) pretty much the same clothes. They've all explained that they need not waste their time and energy on deciding what to eat or wear every day. So, take a page out of their book. Routinise the unimportant decisions as much as you can. Commit time to make healthy choices just once, such as which food you’ll eat, what clothes you’ll wear and when you’ll exercise. Then make them a routine. That way, you leave plenty of willpower and psychological energy for the important and less routine decisions. Can't decide? Go with your gut! shutterstock/Taisiya Kozorez 3.Don’t make decisions on an empty stomach It may sound odd, but there’s scientific proof of this old decision-making wisdom: don’t make big decisions on an empty stomach. The appetite-increasing hormone ghrelin can hinder your ability to make a right call. Findings from several experiments revealed that we’re better equipped to make (proper) decisions when we’re not low on glucose levels. Simply put, with every decision we make, we use some of our energy. And it needs to be replenished if you want to make judgements with your full capacity. 4. Pros and cons lists and other tools A tested way of analysing your options is to make a pros and cons list. It’s a simple but effective means of taking control of the chaos in your mind when facing a decision. It’s also an excellent way to make sure you’ve covered it all and get rid of the anxiety. In addition to this technique, you can also utilise other tools, such as SWOT analysis, or journaling, to address the unhelpful beliefs you may have. 5. Go with your gut Even though it might sound irrational, intuition may, in some cases, be your go-to method of making a choice. Intuition, as a psychological construct, is nothing ethereal or mystical. It’s also not to be confused with impulsiveness, which is guided by an urge for immediate satisfaction of emotional or other needs. Intuition is based on expertise and can be a great way of making decisions when speed is crucial, such as in business or healthcare. “Recognize that some decisions you will make may not work out, and that's OK. You will manage. Get support when you need it – and keep moving forward.” 6. The 10/10/10 rule The 10/10/10 rule, proposed by Suzy Welch, a business writer, is a fast and effective tool to use when you need to put your decision into perspective. So, when you can’t tell if your decision is the right one, simply ask yourself these three simple but insight-evoking questions: How will I feel about it 10 minutes from now? How about 10 months from now? How about 10 years from now? Your answers should help you get a feel for making a well-informed choice. 7. Face your fears and move forward Yes, life is daunting. And yes, we’re often burdened with unhelpful beliefs about it. However, most of our concerns are irrational. And we also have a much greater capacity to overcome problems than we realise. So, recognize that some decisions you make may not work out, and that's OK. You will manage. Get support when you need it – and keep moving forward. Decide not to be indecisive Indecision doesn’t merely affect you before the decision is made. It was found to cause post-decision dysfunctional behaviour, such as worry, as well. In other words, the effects of being indecisive don’t end with you picking an option. It can linger with you much longer than that. You might also get used to giving the power to others, or become a conformist, which are rarely optimal options. Break free from indecisiveness and its influence on your life. Start by making this resolution – not to be indecisive anymore! ● Main image: shutterstock/fran–kies Written by Stanislava Puač Jovanović Stanislava Puač Jovanović has a master’s degree in psychology and works as a freelance writer and researcher in this area. During her early career, she gained several certifications (life coach, assertive communication trainer, peer educator, fitness instructor). Her primary focus is on questions relating to mental health, stress-management, self-development and well-being.

Breathing is essential and something we do without thinking. But a new book suggests that we should pay it more attention as we can use the power of the breath to heal emotional and physical symptoms. Jacqui Paterson digs deeper. Breathing. It’s the most natural thing in the world, right? Controlled by the medulla oblongata – one of the most primitive parts of our brain – that automatically starts the moment we enter the world and take our first tremulous, wailing breaths. We rarely pay attention to this essential biological process where, very simplistically, air is pulled into the lungs, where oxygen is extracted and dispersed around our body, and the waste product – carbon dioxide – is exhaled out. In fact, probably the only time many of us really think about breathing is when we’re having trouble doing so –when we’re puffed from exerting ourselves, or when panic attacks cause us to hyperventilate. But, perhaps, we should be a lot more conscious of the healing power of the breath on a day-to-day basis. That’s because when we don’t give our breathing enough focus, it defaults to its basic auto-pilot function. Yes, it’s enough to keep us alive, but it’s usually shallow and erratic and doesn’t allow us access to the huge array of additional healing benefits breathing can provide. The healing power of the breath In fact, abdominal breathing techniques have been used for centuries, especially through the practise of yoga. Indeed, so-called breathwork makes up a huge component of this ancient Indian practice, which unites mind, breath and body to improve fitness, health and well-being. RELATED: Tummo breathing and meditation – a guide But, in fact, there are so many ways breathwork can be used to our benefit. Our breath is an endless resource we can call on at any time; a fact well known to psychotherapist and breathwork expert, Oliver James, who has used breathing techniques to totally transform his life. Can we use our breath to heal? shutterstock/LumineImages Five years ago, at the tail-end of his psychotherapy training, James came to the realisation that breathing wasn’t just an unconscious reflex, but something that united every living person on the planet. He devoted the next year to studying breathing techniques, soaking up all the published works he could find, but also exploring, reflecting and experimenting with his own breath. What he discovered was there was a style of breath to lessen or relieve multiple situations, from cravings and insomnia, to public speaking and nausea. This realisation changed his life, and compelled him to share what he’d learned in his book, 21 Breaths (Breathing Techniques to Change Your Life). There is a breath for everything, he states confidently. Before you dismiss the words as a bit ‘out there’, James backs it up with biological fact, explaining how each of the individual parts and systems of our body rely on breathing and the absorption of oxygen, and how we can improve each function simply by making our intake of air more purposeful and efficient. Think of it like putting fuel in a car – the basic version will allow it to run, but the enhanced version helps it run more smoothly and efficiently and will better protect all the components of the engine. Breathwork works in the same way – except the engine is your body. How to breathe properly James starts by asking a simple question – are we breathing properly? The best way is to use the diaphragm, a muscle that separates the chest from the stomach, for abdominal breathing. According to the British Lung Foundation, this is the main breathing muscle and works by contracting when you breathe in, pulling the lungs downwards, stretching and expanding them. When you breathe out, it relaxes back into a dome shape, and helps push the carbon-dioxide heavy waste air out. “We should be a lot more conscious of the healing power of the breath on a day-to-day basis. That’s because when we don’t give our breathing enough focus, it defaults to its basic auto-pilot function.” Your stomach muscles also come into play while exercising, pushing air out of the lungs in a process called forced expiration, AKA the heavy breathing that happens when you exert yourself! Finally, there are also muscles between the ribs that also assist breathing, the intercostal muscles. When they all work together, the gas exchange process (converting oxygen into carbon dioxide) works smoothly to keep our bodies fit and healthy. However, modern life is more sedentary than ever, with many of us sat working at a desk and failing to move around much during the day. This means we often default to chest breathing, where we’re only using the upper chest muscles to activate our lungs. Obviously, this is adequate at keeping us alive, but activating the chest muscles – more typically used when we exercise or during emergency situations – can make the body tense up. Then we take rapid, shallow breaths, which can increase feelings of anxiety. From here, the chain of events continues – if your body detects a stress response, it can activate your fight-or-flight, quickening your pulse and giving you a burst of adrenalin. If it continues to gather pace, it can develop into a panic attack. RELATED: How to help someone having a panic attack – 7 key tips James has a simple test to find out whether you’re relying on chest or abdominal breathing – lie flat on the ground with your knees bent and lay one hand on your chest and the other on your stomach. Which hand feels the most movement? This is where you’re breathing from on a daily basis. Breathing exercises can help with emotional and physical health So, your first task is to ensure you’re breathing smoothly and deeply from your diaphragm. Breathing is something we do without thinking, but abdominal breathing requires us to override that basic functional breath and consciously work to improve its quality. In time, you can reset your body and the better quality breathing will be your norm. From here, you can begin to explore James' 21 Breaths and discovering the healing power of breath. Breathing exercises you can try Here are four of the 21 healing breath techniques from James' book you can practise. 1. 'The Rising Tide': for insomnia After this last year of fear and uncertainty it’s hardly surprising insomnia has been on the rise; arguably one of the most helpful breaths James suggests is the ‘Rising Tide’ – the Breath to Sleep. Lying on your back with your eyes closed and breathe deeply into your lower belly. Hold your breath and tense your entire body until you feel the need to exhale. The next inhale is longer and slower until it reaches to your collarbones, then imagine it going further up into your skull. Again, squeeze your entire body and hold the breath, then allow all the tension to drain from your body as you exhale. After 10 breaths, return to normal; repeat the cycle for a total of three times. 2. 'The Star': for posture For all those inadvertent home workers who’ve spent the past year hunched over laptops on sofas and kitchen tables, ‘The Star’ – a healing breath to improve posture – is another gem. It uses the breath to concentrate on elongating the spine, creating space between those scrunched up vertebrae and encouraging the shoulders backwards. With consistent practise you can calm your breathing, release muscle tension, and improve your posture. Stand with your back against a wall, palms facing outwards. Step your feet out around 15cm and make sure your head, shoulders and buttocks are flat against the surface of the wall. Inhale and exhale slowly and deeply, using all your abdominal muscles, and feel how the breath lifts and lengthens your spine. Pause for a few seconds at the bottom of your breath, and continue pulling up from the head and spine as you press backwards with your head and buttocks. Enjoy that delicious stretch! 3. 'Diaphragmatic Breathing': for heartburn Acid reflux is a common partner of stress, and can cause a lot of discomfort. If you want to avoid going down the medication route, ‘Diaphragmatic Breathing’ – the Breath for Heartburn, might be your answer. “Breathing is something we do without thinking, but abdominal breathing requires us to override that basic functional breath and consciously work to improve its quality.” In 21 Breaths, James points out there are many contributing factors for heartburn, but the right breathing techniques can help to release tension in the diaphragm and calm the digestive system. Start by sitting in a comfortable positive, with the knees below the hips. With both hands resting on the lower abdomen, shut your eyes and breathe in through the nose and out through the mouth, making sure the breath stays relaxed and effortless. Inhale until you can feel your abdomen fill and inflate beneath your hands. Pause for a moment at the top of the breath, then slowly exhale. Continue for 15 to 20 minutes. This should be carried out half an hour before eating, or any time you feel that uncomfortable twinge of heartburn. 4. 'The Hum': for public speaking fears If Zoom calls fill you with dread, ‘The Hum’ – a breath to help public speaking – could be your saviour. Yoga practitioners might find this breath familiar, as it follows a similar principal to Bhramari, or the ‘Bee Breath’; both use the vibrations created by humming to release tension in the body. Begin with 10 deep abdominal breaths Continue with 10 breaths while humming. Close your eyes to concentrate more clearly on all the sensations the sound creates. Try stretching your body in different directions during the practise to discover what feels most calming. At the end of your breathwork you’ll feel more focused and relaxed, and ready to tackle that video conference with confidence! 21 Breaths also features healing breath to calm a nervous flyer, one to increase confidence, one to help lower blood pressure and even a breath that teams with self-reflection to help heal a relationship. The takeaway: healing power of breath Breathing is an automatic and essential function but we need to pay more attention to it and its potential to heal or help certain health conditions or situations. Whatever your ailment, you could have the remedy right under your nose – literally! • 21 Breaths: Breathing Techniques to Change Your Life, by Oliver James, is published by Unify Books. Main image: shutterstock/fizkes happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member? Sign up for free now to enjoy: ■ our happiness magazine with practical life tips ■ share and support others in our happiness forum ■ self-develop with free online classes in our happiness Academy Nature | Astrology | Spirituality Written by Jacqui Paterson Jacqui has been a true-life and travel journalist for over 25 years and has travelled all over the world telling people's stories. Originally from New Zealand, she's now based in the UK, where she also wrangles two pre-teen daughters, and runs her lifestyle blog, Jacqui Paterson.com

Imagine a world with fairly distributed wealth and a happy, enriched workforce. These are two of the aims of Buddhist economics. Ed Gould delves into the background of this economic model and asks whether it can ever become a reality. Economic life may be something that seems out of our control. Indeed, the forces of macroeconomics can appear akin to a tsunami that individuals can do little about. And yet, even an enormous wave is made up of single drops of water. Individuals can decide how they spend, save and deal with the world from a financial point of view. Essentially, Buddhist economics looks at finances from a spiritual and ethical angle. Economics is studied from the standpoint of human psychology and how natural emotive reactions can direct a range of economic activities. So, what exactly is Buddhist economics? One Sri Lankan economist has described a Buddhist economic system as something that “has its foundations in the development of a co-operative and harmonious effort”. Writing in 1976, Neville Karunatilake said that the ideal place to operate in this way was within a “group living” setting. Perhaps building on the ashram idea of communal living espoused by Gandhi, Tolstoy and others, this approach would lead to a diminished level of “selfishness and acquisitive pursuits” which might have been seen in the days the Buddhist king Ashoka's rule. Referring back to a pre-industrial time, many classically trained economists might easily miss the point of what Buddhist economics can mean for the 21st-century world. However, as we shall see, Buddhist ideas about economics have developed throughout the world over the last few decades. This is partly because people are increasingly aware of the fragility of the global financial system and because of the destructive nature of many industrial processes which harm the planet. In an attempt to address these issues, some economists have tried to look at the principles behind Buddhist ethical teachings and apply them to areas like work, productivity, commerce and even concepts such as ownership. After all, it was the ethical nature of Buddhism that led Ashoka to invest in public works programmes such as those which built hospitals, hostels and parks. “Buddhist ideas about economics have developed over the last few decades partly because people are increasingly aware of the destructive nature of many industrial processes which harm the planet.” Building interest in the ethical dimension of Buddhist economics, the first international conference of its type was held in the city of Budapest in 2007. Further such conventions, which look into all aspects of Buddhist economic thought, from increasing happiness to facing up to the economic challenges of Western economies, have since taken place. How did Buddhist economics get to this level of acceptance among modern academics? Not child's play: Buddhist economics isn't easy to implement The development of Buddhist economics According to the Buddhist writer, P A Payutto, the traditional study of economics has avoided vital questions about human morality and ethical considerations. However, as ecological concerns have become more critical in the eyes of many people around the globe, so ever-increasing growth – something that most capitalist economies rely upon – has become seen as negative. Therefore, alternatives economic views have become increasingly mainstream. Both right and left wing economic views have, according to the zero-growth economic models espoused by certain green politicians, got little to offer regarding preserving the world's resources. Buddhist economics fits into that tradition and has been gaining more significant attention since Payutto started publishing in the 1990s. RELATED: Spending money – can you buy yourself happiness? The idea of Buddhist economics was first espoused in the 20th century by E F Schumacher, a German statistician, who came up with his ideas while travelling through southeast Asia. Schumacher ended up being an economic advisor to Prime Minister U Nu of what was then Burma. His idea was to reject the economic theories of both Karl Marx and Adam Smith, both of whom focussed on units of labour as being the primary economic drivers in any economic model. Instead, Schumacher espoused a view of economics from a Buddhist point of view. Essentially, Schumacher opted to redefine work from something that could be sold, for example to employers, or exploited, through slavery or unpaid labour, as well as choosing to view it as something that did not necessarily need to be conducted most efficiently. In other words, his view of work was one that was there to enrich the basic happiness of the person doing it from a spiritual standpoint, not from an economic one. When work works: we should be enriched by our labour efforts Let's look at what Schumacher means by taking an example. In a factory, the most efficient way of making an item for sale into the wider economy might be to divide the labour up so that each worker does a repetitive task over and over. This simplifies their job function, makes the production method more predictable and lowers costs, especially if production is speeded up significantly. The outcome might be that the factory owner makes more money with such a system. Henry Ford, the American car maker, is often cited as a pioneer of these sorts of workplace practices which were developed for economic reasons. Schumacher turns that idea on its head. He put forward the idea that work should not be measured by economic output. “In other words, Schaumacher's view of work was one that was there to enrich the basic happiness of the person doing it from a spiritual standpoint, not from an economic one.” Indeed, according to his Buddhist principle, work is there to offer a worker the chance to utilise and develop all of his faculties, not just one or two key skills. Also, this will enable a worker to overcome egocentric ideas, mainly when work is conducted with other people in a common task, for example, building a house together. Crucially, Schumacher stated that work should “bring forth the goods and services needed for a becoming existence”. In other words, work ought to create enough economic output to sustain life but no more. Working just to accumulate more and more wealth is pointless from a spiritual perspective. Being rich is, in other words, counterproductive. Economic problems and Buddhist solutions Since the global financial crisis, many people have woken up to the idea that the economic system that has sustained the West, in particular, may not be the be-all-and-end-all. If the system could crash and the money supply seize up once, then could it do so again? In addition, the rise of China as a global economic force – a country that does not run on liberal economic models – has caused some people to think that the way things have been done does not mean that is the way they must continue. The world becomes more global in its inter-connectedness, so goods move more rapidly and resources are used up. Some see the emergence of nationalism in recent years as a direct result of global economic trends over which local communities have little control. Global economic challenges like these can be met by Buddhist teachings. Not only do they convey the idea that man is interdependent on his fellow man, but that overproduction for the sake of economic growth is undesirable. “Since the global financial crisis, many people have woken up to the idea that the economic system that has sustained the West, in particular, may not be the be-all-and-end-all.” According to Clair Brown, an economics professor at UC Berkeley and the director of the Center for Work, Technology and Society, students she teaches are focussed on the tremendous economic inequalities that globalization has produced. In a world where the richest one per cent of the population own half of all the wealth, it's clear that inequality – and abject poverty – is rife. Rise above? Buddhist economics could challenge poverty Brown teaches that happiness, founded on less inequality, and the simple act of helping each other with compassion is the answer to these undeniable economic challenges. She puts forward the idea that economists must let go of the principle that people are fundamentally selfish and that they will always choose the best economic outcome for themselves. By studying cities in the so-called Rust Belt of America, she points out that economists must work in a way that is “compatible with what neuroscientists are finding out about people’s well-being and the way minds work.” How can mankind and our planet benefit? The economic challenges of poverty, inequality, globalization and ecology can all be met by adopting a Buddhist approach to economics, so its proponents claim. On ecology, for example, Professor Brown cites the withdrawal by the US from the Paris Accords as something that does not ascribe to Buddhist teachings of being mindful of others. RELATED: Six science-backed benefits of living a simple life Man can benefit from adopting Buddhist economics because of self-interest, so inherent in Western economic models, is illusory. Instead of bartering for the best deal, the approach should be to adopt an economic model of mutual reciprocity. Why? Because we feel negative about ourselves and others in the former model and a higher degree of happiness and inner peace with the latter. Imagine what could be achieved by humans if everyone just got on better with one another because they felt less pressured to make a few pounds? From a global point of view, this would bring about a deceleration in the exploitation of the Earth's valuable resources, helping to make economic life sustainable not just for today but for future generations. ● Main image: Colourbox.com happiness.com | The fine art of being: learn, practise, share Are you a happiness.com member yet? Sign up for free now to enjoy: ■ our happiness magazine with practical life tips ■ share and support others in our happiness forum ■ develop with free online classes in our happiness Academy Work life balance | Biology | Community living Written by Ed Gould Ed Gould is a UK-based journalist and practitioner of Reiki.